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101 rules of black metal!

Genial liste for deg som skal bli svart metaller :D

 

1. Don't be gay.

2. Be "true".

3. All people who aren’t "true" are gay.

4. Be grim.

5. Be necro.

6. Be simultaneously grim and necro if at all possible.

22. When in doubt, say "True Norwiegian Black Metal!"

70. Spelling things correctly is neither grim nor necro.

94. Own every Darkthrone release. Listen to exactly none of them.

 

 

:D

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101 rules of prog metal!

 

 

10. Make sure your drummer has a double bass pedal.

12. Own every side-project a member of Dream Theater has been involved in. Listen to approximately none of them regularly.

19. If a mainstream fool tells you that shredders are mindless wankers, tell him that "at least they can tune their guitars, har har", and walk away defiantly.

23. Accuse any prog metal musician that cuts his hair of selling out.

29. Get an Ibanez. This is not negotiable.

98. Have side-projects. Make sure that all side-projects consist of pointless jamming over endless repetitions of clicheed riffs.

99. Make sure that at least one of your side-projects feature Mike Portnoy on drums.

100. If you cannot get Mike Portnoy, get someone who sounds like him.

 

:D

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23. Accuse any prog metal musician that cuts his hair of selling out.

29. Get an Ibanez. This is not negotiable.

99. Make sure that at least one of your side-projects feature Mike Portnoy on drums.

100. If you cannot get Mike Portnoy, get someone who sounds like him.

Har har, dette er great late night fun. :!:

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10. Make sure your drummer has a double bass pedal. Fixed!

12. Own every side-project a member of Dream Theater has been involved in. Listen to approximately none of them regularly. Fixed! (høyrer på det tho' =P)

19. If a mainstream fool tells you that shredders are mindless wankers, tell him that "at least they can tune their guitars, har har", and walk away defiantly. Hell yeah!

23. Accuse any prog metal musician that cuts his hair of selling out. Næh...

29. Get an Ibanez. This is not negotiable. Fixed! (opp til fleire ganger)

98. Have side-projects. Make sure that all side-projects consist of pointless jamming over endless repetitions of clicheed riffs. Fixed!(riffa våre rocker tho')

99. Make sure that at least one of your side-projects feature Mike Portnoy on drums. Njet...

100. If you cannot get Mike Portnoy, get someone who sounds like him. Fixed!

 

:w00t:

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Siden jeg er godt i gang:

 

196 rules of doom metal!

 

1. Life is too short to experience all that is good.

2. Life is too long to enjoy living.

3. Every day is a funeral.

4. Do not wear anything but flat black clothes and combat boots.

5. Do not smile

6. Do not laugh.

13. It is acceptable to listen to non-doomy music if you play it at 1/4 of its normal tempo.

20. Album covers must contain one of the following: Ruins, Spirits in agony, A cemetary sculpture of an angel, or A pretty painting of heaven...

21. But you're not a Goth!

40. If you feel down, then listen to some truly soul crushing, suicidal doom to cheer you up.

64. True doomsters are too depressed to go to band practice.

 

 

:wee:

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