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"Shit happens" - Forrest Gump

 

Islam:

If shit happens, it is the will of Allah

Protestantism:

Let the shit happen to someone else

Catholicism:

If shit happens, you deserve it

Judaism:

Why does shit always happen to us?

Sufism:

The wise man never notices shit happening

Christian Science:

If shit happens, pretend it doesn't really exist

Taoism:

Shit happens

Confucionism:

Confucius says: "Shit happens"

Buddhism:

If shit happens, it isn't really shit

Zen:

What is the sound of shit happening?

Hinduism:

This shit has happened before

Solipsism:

Shit happens because I wish it

Mysticism:

Just experience shit happening

Asceticism:

If shit happens, renounce it

Agnosticism:

Nobody knows why shit happens

Gnosticism:

I know why shit happens but won't tell you

Atheism:

Shit just happens and that's all there is to it

Cartesianism:

Shit happens to me, therefore I exist

Platonism:

There is ideal shit happening somewhere

Stoicism:

I don't care if shit happens

Epicureanism:

Let's party while shit doesn't happen

Cynicism:

Of course shit happens

Occultism:

Shit materializes from other planes of existence

Terrorism:

Shit will happen unless you do as I say

Pollyanism:

It's so nice that shit happens!

Puritanism:

S** can happen all day as long as you don't call it that

Behaviorism:

You are conditioned to having shit happen

Freudianism:

If shit happens, it's your mother's fault

Parapsychology:

Shit happens without material causes

Surrealism:

Purple shit happens near melting clocks

Cubism:

If shit happens, you won't recognize it

Cultural relativism:

Shit happens everywhere differently

Optimism:

If shit happens, we'll find a way to use it

Pessimism:

If shit happens, there won't be enough for everybody

Tabloid Sensationalism:

Green shit from Mars happens to Elvis clone

Biblical Creationism:

Shit happens because God created it

Secular Humanism:

Shit happens because it evolved from primitive shit

Scientific Reductionism:

If shit happens, find out what kind exactly

Scientific Obscurantism:

Amorphous excrement does occur in given cases

Bureaucracy:

I don't care if shit happens as long as you fill out the forms

Feminism:

Women demand to have shit happen

Ecology:

If organic shit happens, it's OK

Capitalism:

Let's profit from shit happening

Socialism:

If shit happens, let's distribute it equally

Patriotism:

Our shit is better than your shit

Conservatism:

They don't make even shit happen like they used to

Liberalism:

Shit shouldn't happen tomorrow

Classical Physics:

Shit does not 'happen', it just moves around

Quantum Physics #1:

Shit happens but you can't say both where and when

Quantum Physics #2:

Shit happens in discrete quanta called shitons

Holistic Physics:

If shit happens, it happens everywhere at once

Microcomputing:

If shit happens, we'll fix it in the next version

Computer Science:

All shit can in principle happen on a Turing Machine

Applied Mathematics:

The probabity of shit happening approaches unity

Engineering:

When shit happens, paint over

Medicine:

If shit happens, take two Aspirins and call me in the morning

Economics:

Shit happens because there's a geat demand for it

Politics:

If shit happens, make a deal with it

Diplomacy:

Let's pretend shit doesn't happen

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Videoannonse
Annonse

The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country...

 

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I dindn't live in this century...

 

I have made good judgemenst in the past. I have made good judgements in the future...

 

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls...

 

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the imuprities in our air and water that are doing it...

 

They misunderestimated me...

 

I think we agree, the past is over...

 

It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it...

 

 

 

ja... du gjettet riktig... dette er verdens mektigste mann... George W Bush

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  • 2 år senere...

<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars

<Cthon98> ********* see!

<AzureDiamond> hunter2

<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me

<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******

<Cthon98> thats what I see

<AzureDiamond> oh, really?

<Cthon98> Absolutely

<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2

<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?

<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that

<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> awesome!

<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?

<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw

<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.

Lenke til kommentar
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars

<Cthon98> ********* see!

<AzureDiamond> hunter2

<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me

<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******

<Cthon98> thats what I see

<AzureDiamond> oh, really?

<Cthon98> Absolutely

<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2

<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?

<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that

<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> awesome!

<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?

<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw

<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.

8123007[/snapback]

Haha, den er så bra. Man skal være ganske godtroende for å gå med på noe sånn :!:

Endret av Sindrelol
Lenke til kommentar

Enda litt mer lettlurt:

 

br0kenrabbit says:

hi

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

good evening

 

br0kenrabbit says:

What's ip?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

up?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

my name is greg a member of the valve online Support team

 

br0kenrabbit says:

On MSN?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

yes :)

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Why?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

we logged multiple ips from your account and ned to verifi your information

 

br0kenrabbit says:

My information?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

we believe someone may have stolen your account mmmm you havent shared youre account infomation with anyone have you?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

No. I don't even have it written down.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

hmmm maybe a keylogger on you r PC then maybe you need a format?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Well...

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

if you can verify your account information to me i can insure that only your ip have access to it Its a new security feature were trying because this happens so muchlogin names and passwords aint safe anymroe You know. L:)

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Well

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

dont worry this connect it secure

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Can I be honest with you, Greg?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

k

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Look, I don't know how you go this MSN account name, don't really care, either.

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Unlike you, I DO work for Valve. Trace my ip and you'll see.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

huh?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

bs

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Trace it.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

how

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Start/run/cmd type Tracert and then my IP address and hit enter.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

oh k

 

br0kenrabbit says:

As an employee, I know that Valve employees will NEVER contact users over MSN. I also know a valve employee will NEVER ask a user for his/her username and password.

 

br0kenrabbit says:

I'm putting a temporary hold on your Steam account.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

why?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Have you read the ToS?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

Tod?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

tos

 

br0kenrabbit says:

terms of service

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

were?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Greg, this is a serious infraction against the Tos. You are at risk of losing your account.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

why

 

br0kenrabbit says:

I just told you why

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

:(

 

br0kenrabbit says:

I need some information from you if you want me to unlock you account. I'm going to write you up but I will only suspend you account for three days, since this is your first infraction, okay?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

k

 

br0kenrabbit says:

First, what is the name the account is registered to. Not the user name, the persons real name who created the account. This is for verification purposes.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

xxxxx xxxxxxx

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Is this you?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

ya

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Are you the only user of this account?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

ya

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Okay, and what is the username

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

xxxxxxxx

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Okay.

 

br0kenrabbit says:

I see you have purchased a few of our games, thank you. :)

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

some. dude

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

m

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Do you always log on from the same IP?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

ya

 

br0kenrabbit says:

And who is your internet providers, your ISP?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

xxxxxxx

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Thank you. One moment, please, let me verify this information.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

am i gonna be bale to play 2nite?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

What is your city of residence?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

That depends on if you cooperate. You're doing fine so far.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

xxxxxx

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Illinios?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

yes

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Okay. And what is the password associated with this account?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

xxxxxxx

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Okay. Do not try to log into steam. If you are connected now you need to log off.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

why

 

br0kenrabbit says:

So I can update your account.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

can I play 2 nite

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

clan fight

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

wont win without me heh

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Heh. You'll have to wait a few minutes. Are you logged off?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

ya

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Okay. Give me just a moment.

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Try to log in now.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

k

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

It says login failed wtf wtf!!@?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Greg

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

did u ban me?????>WHY

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Greg

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

what

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Valve will never ask for your username and password.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

what??

 

br0kenrabbit says:

I don't work for Valve dude, but you just got pwnt.

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

omg dude wtf why?

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Why were you trying to steal my account?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

i wanst

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Then why were you asking for my information?

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

i was just making a joke but not cerious honest dude just give

my acount back pllllleeease i'm only 13 and save d up for like a year to buy it

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Greg

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

dude pleas

 

Greg_ValveOLS says:

what

 

br0kenrabbit says:

Go mow some yards, bitch.

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Enda litt mer lettlurt:

 

[...]

br0kenrabbit says:

Go mow some yards, bitch.

8124177[/snapback]

 

Jeg gråter. :tease:

 

Duke Nukem er kongen av konger når deg gjelder sitater;

 

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum. And I'm all outta gum.
Die, you son of a bitch!
Eat shit and die!
Your face, your ass... what's the difference?
Damn, I'm looking good
Nobody steals our chicks... and lives!
This *really* pisses me off!
I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck!
So help me Duke!
You're an inspiration for birth control!
You're gonna die for that!
It hurts to be you.
Guess again, freakshow. Duke's coming back to town, and the last thing that's gonna go through your mind before you die... is my size 13 boot!
I'm God's gift to women!
I prefer a good cigar... and a bad woman
The bigger they are, the more they bleed!
You're too good looking to kill, but I'm gonna kill you anyway!
Ah, New York! If I can kill 'em here...I can kill 'em ANYWHERE!
Come on Morphix, there's only two ways this can end, and in both of them, you die!
Endret av Emomilol
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<MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike

<goatboy> what?

<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.

<goatboy> er?

<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.

<goatboy> and?

<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.

<goatboy> ...

<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.

<goatboy> i dont get it

<MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL.

<goatboy> bastard

 

 

---

 

 

Denne er best!

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Klikk for å se/fjerne innholdet nedenfor
(Mootar) morons.

(Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless

(Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network

(Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways

(Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer

 

Krypterte nettverk ftw.

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"Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half." --Gore Vidal

haha genial.

Mange som er godtroende her. Vet ikke helt om jeg tror på alle..

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<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars

<Cthon98> ********* see!

<AzureDiamond> hunter2

<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me

<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******

<Cthon98> thats what I see

<AzureDiamond> oh, really?

<Cthon98> Absolutely

<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2

<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?

<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that

<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******

<AzureDiamond> awesome!

<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?

<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw

<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.

8123007[/snapback]

Har greid å lure en på den måten. Han følte seg ganske dum ut etterpå :p

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