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Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

 

Chapter 1: Irish Influences

 

 

That was his grandpa’s name, too, and that pleased him. He had always felt a closeness to Grandpa Sullivan. He was ever ready to go to Ohio, where they were today, whenever Lila decided to go see Grandma and some of the aunts.

 

If it was nice weather, as today, they usually stopped at Swamp College Cemetery to pay respects to the two family graves there, that of Grandpa and that of Uncle John, who had been killed in Germany during the War. Usually, Lila and her two sisters kept the graves looking as good as they could, considering the cheap headstones that had been put in place many years ago. Grandpa’s, in particular, was weathering badly; it was of cheap granite, and the polished surface was hardly readable any more.

 

Robert had been to that cemetery many times over the years and remembered how the markers had looked; at least, he remembered Grandpa’s. A cluster of grapes beside a plain cross was the design of the carving that Grandma Sullivan chose back in 1947. It was now hardly discernible on the old, cheap slant marker which had three lines of wording carved on it”

 

IN LOVING MEMORY

ROBERT SULLIVAN

1879 – 1947

 

 

Although his grandparents had been quite poor for most of their lives, Robert felt proud to be among their offspring. The Sullivan name, itself, brought a sense of being somebody. Robert figured that, somewhere in the last 100 years or so, someone had decided to drop the “O” from “O’Sullivan”, just to try to remove any stigma of being Irish. Yet, to Robert, the Irishness was a major part of the pride - - along with the solid Christian character of much of the old family. Besides his own observations, Robert had learned a lot about the family’s Christian heritage through stories Lila, his mother, repeated over the first nineteen years of his life.

 

There were a few scandalous events, skeletons in the closet, so to speak, but they were skillfully explained to Robert’s satisfaction. Generally, he was quite pleased to be a part of this Sullivan experience.

 

“Robert, are you listening, Son?” It was the voice of Lila. Clearly, she had been trying to talk to him for the last few seconds but was getting no response.

 

“I’m sorry, Mom,” he finally responded. Chuckling, he added, “I guess I was just remembering things and so much involved in my thoughts that I didn’t hear you. What were you asking me?”

 

Joining her son in chuckling, Lila went on, “I was about to ask if you really remember Grandpa Sullivan. He’s been gone now for about eight years. You must have been around eleven or so when he died. What do you remember about him?”

 

“Yeah, I remember some stuff, like Christmas. You remember how we always had to go to Grandpa and Grandma Sullivan’s on Christmas Day every year.”

 

Lila nodded agreement. “I always wanted to see my family at Christmas. Chauncey never seemed to care about seeing his side of the family, but it was really important to me. So, what do you remember most about Christmas at Montezuma?” (Montezuma was the little town where the older Sullivans had settled in a small house to be near several of their children.”

 

“I never liked to come here to Ohio for Christmas, to be honest about it,” Robert answered. “None of us boys did.”

 

Confused, Lila chose the obvious question, “But, why?”

 

“Well, you and Dad always gave us a great Christmas, lots of toys and good stuff. We hated to leave it all behind for the day, when we had just seen it for a few minutes. Then, too, we knew Grandma didn’t have much money and couldn’t get us much of anything. So, we spent the whole day here with nothing great to do. Some years, Grandma Sullivan gave us a hanky apiece, with maybe the Three Little Pigs on it or something like that.” After a pause, Robert continued, “Of course, Grandma Lewis never gave us anything, not for any special days.” he explained. “I guess we were selfish, a little.”

 

“Not really, Son,” countered Lila. “Maybe I was the selfish one, dragging you boys out every time I wanted to make the long trip from St. Leon to here.”

 

“You didn’t get to come here often, Mom,” Robert didn’t want his mother to feel any guilt for seeing her family only three or four times a year. “Are we about ready to head back, now? I still have to do the milking and things before too late.”

 

“I’ve been wondering how to tell something to you and to your brothers and Chauncey,” Lila confessed. “I think I’ll be back here again next week to take Grandma back to live with us.” She looked troubled, deep in thought about something, aware that this unscheduled act would put a lot of strain on a less-than-ideal marriage. “You heard what Ruth said, didn’t you? You know a little about Grandma’s condition after what Ruth told us. I just have to do something to help Grandma.”

 

This was quite a surprise, but Robert tried to not show undo alarm, either in his facial expression or in his voice as he asked, “Can you really swing it? I mean, Dad will... err, where would you put her, and who would take care of her; I mean, you and Dad both work second shift.” He paused to do some more thinking, then went on, “Mom, if there’s no one else in the family to take her in, I guess I can try to be a help somehow, if there’s something I can do. Still, I don’t know what it would be, at least, not right at the moment.”

 

“You’ve got your life to live, Robert. I can’t expect any of you boys to take care of my mother. I have to talk to Chauncey and try to work out a plan.” Lila tried to smile and toss off any appearance of worrying. Walking toward the car, she suggested, “We’d better go back to Ruth’s and say good-bye and be on our way. You’ve got the milking to do, and probably a date with Sandra again tonight, right?”

 

Blushing a bit, Robert stammered out some news, “Mom, you told me a few days ago that maybe God was trying to tell me that I shouldn’t be seeing her anymore; remember the tight chest and the breathing problems I was having?” After Lila gave a slight nod while walking to the car, he went on, “Sandra is not interested in God or church. I don’t want to talk about it, but she’s wanting to carry on in ways that I don’t think the Lord approves. My pastor sometimes mentions the problem of going to places that I’ve sometimes gone with her. I don’t feel good about it.”

 

“So, it’s off?” Some relief showed on Lila’s face, but she said no more about it or about the earlier discussion they had had.

 

“It’s off. I’m sure God has a better choice for me. And it’s OK. I do like Sandra, but I love God and don’t want my life to displease Him.” After a pause, Robert asked, reaching out his hand for the keys, “Want me to drive?”

 

On the way from Ruth’s home to St. Leon, Robert and Lila had a lot of time to talk. Part of the talk centered on some possibilities for dealing with Grandma Sullivan’s move to their home; some was about general family concerns; some was about memories of the grandparents, especially the catfish heads which Grandpa nailed to the tool shed wall when he caught a really big one. Although Lila was not attending church, and hadn’t for most of her married life, she talked to her oldest son about church and her Christian life during her teen years and the early months of her marriage to Chauncey Lewis, Robert’s father.

 

During the two and a half hour trip home, Robert began telling his mother of how a book he had recently read had been influencing his life. “It’s called Have We No Right?. It’s really supposed to be a missionary book, but it deals with the day-to-day life of any Christian. This book got me to thinking, you know? I started out a little over a year ago to be a Christian. Some of the people at the Friends Church looked at me sort of funny, or at least I felt they did, when I went up to the altar that Sunday morning. They treat me OK, but I think some of them think I’m going off on the deep end, that I’m too Christian. I hope they don’t feel that way, but I think a couple of them do.”

 

“Who, Robert?” asked Lila with surprise obvious. “I didn’t think anyone felt that way. Who are they?”

 

“No, if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t want to have you feeling bad about someone, and for sure, I wouldn’t want them to even know I have these doubts.” He reached over and patted Lila’s shoulder as he drove northward to Michigan. “That’s not what I was wanting to say anyhow. This book suggests that we have no rights as Christians, that is, no rights to make big money or to get married or lots of other things. It’s only if God chooses for us to have these things that we may have them. Miss Kuhn, the writer of the book, feels that when we take up our cross daily to follow Him, like the Bible says, we are satisfied with what He chooses for our lives. That sounds good to me.”

 

As she occasionally did, Lila began losing her ability to be calmly rational. “Does this mean you’re not ever going to get married, Robert?”

 

“Not at all, Mom, he countered. “Probably God has someone for me, but I’m only nineteen, you know. What’s the hurry? But if not, I believe He will make me happy with whatever my life holds. Quit worrying. Besides, I’ve got better choices available than Sandra, you know. Remember the three girls at Buckingham Church I told you about? And, then too, when I went to Lester Chapel last Thursday night, I saw a girl who seems really nice, not that I’m looking that desperately, but my eyes are open.”

 

They decided to find other topics of discussion for the remainder of the trip to St. Leon, including how Robert’s college classes were coming.

 

Finally they pulled the red and white station wagon into the drive. Home at last.

 

As expected, Chauncey did not receive Lila’s request with great understanding, at least. not at first. As he usually did, he had to swear a few times, taking off the billed cap to expose his very bald, darkly tanned pate. Lila knew him well, though, and suspected that, after his tirade, he would become more rational. She was right, too. Although they had had enough conflict in their twenty-one years of marriage, they had some good foundations on which to build agreements. Neither of them felt their parents should ever be put into a nursing home if any of the children were able to take them in.

 

As Robert headed out to do the milking, he felt confident that his parents would work out some way to take in Grandma Sullivan. They cared about each other’s relatives, and despite any amount of swearing Robert heard, he knew they were concerned about caring for their people. Sometimes, Robert felt that his parents enjoyed bickering and acting angry with each other.

 

Because of the trip to Ohio, Robert had not got home early enough to get his daily chores done and still get to the Thursday night prayer service at a neighboring church. He decided that he would to go to the little country church on First Night service, Sunday night. He was torn between that church and Buckingham, which is his usual Sunday night choice.

 

Chapter 2: SCOTCH INFLUENCES

 

 

The Sullivan relatives, Lila’s side of the family, seemed honorable to Robert, somehow more honorable in some ways than the Lewis side. He greatly admired the Christian background of Lila (before she married Chauncey). He had also learned that most of his aunts and uncles on the Sullivan side had been dedicated Christians in their youthful days. Attending the church of God, most of them were involved in special music for the church, and many of them were baptized by the old lady pastor of the church. Although some of them had departed from their early teachings, they all seemed to remember and cherish the religious training that Robert and Sarah Sullivan had provided.

 

In Robert’s eyes, the Lewis side was less admirable than his mother’s family. Yes, he had a pride in being a Lewis, but it was altogether different than the pride in his Sullivan bloodline.

 

From what he’d been told over the years, Lila met Chauncey by accident. Chauncey’s oldest sister, Viola, lived in Montezuma and was active in the same church, which Sullivans had always attended. One Saturday afternoon, Chauncey paid a visit to Viola and her husband in Montezuma. On the same afternoon, Sarah Sullivan and Lila dropped in to see Viola on church business. It seems that Chauncey saw something in Lila, which he wanted for a wife so he began driving down from Michigan most weekends to see Viola, and to drop in at Sullivans. Much to Sarah’s dismay, this courtship developed into a proposal and, in time, to a simple non-church wedding. Chauncey was not much interested in church or religion but apparently pretended to care, at least, until after he had convinced Lila to marry him.

 

Robert had never known his father to show any inclination toward godliness. His habits of life, his foul language, and his general rough life style in no way resembled those of a Christian gentleman.

 

Chauncey and Robert were not much like father and son. If Chauncey was working outside on a tractor or working with the farm animals, Robert and his two brothers were not welcome to watch and try to help. Chauncey had little patience with children and usually told the boys, “Go in the house with your mother.” After many such messages, they no longer volunteered to go out to spend time with their father. Robert tried to like his dad but had little in common with him.

 

Still, there was a pride in being part of the Lewis family. Lewis is an old name, no doubt named after the island of Lewis, which is off the northwest coast of Scotland. Robert remembered accounts told by his father, and also by Grandma Lewis, that they were not just a Scotch family. There was an American Indian in the distant branches of the family tree. And, too, Grandma Lewis had been a Kirschner, a very German name. All of this added to Robert’s pride in the Lewis name.

 

True to his mostly Scotch heritage, Chauncey had some of the attributes, which Scotsmen are supposed to have. He was an extreme penny pincher as well as a pack rat. He seldom threw anything away. When an old automobile was no longer functioning and roadworthy, it was pulled to the back of Chauncey’s 80 acre farm and kept. Weeds grew up around and claimed the collection of cars and farm implements, which would never run again, but Chauncey always claimed that he was going to repair them and use them again.

 

Kerry was about as much a penny pincher and pack rat as his father. He was three years younger than Robert, somewhat taller and more muscular, and was gifted with good looks. To Robert, it seemed that everything which Kerry touched turned to gold. He always seemed to have money although it was Robert who had a full-time job. Too often, Robert was, to use Kerry’s phrase, “financially embarrassed”. Kerry did odd jobs for neighbors and answered ads he found in Boys Life Magazine, ads promising great prizes for selling such items as garden seeds, salve or wall plaques. He seemed able to sell anything to anyone and earned quite a lot of enviable prizes. The prize which he valued the most was the gold-fendered bicycle he earned for selling garden seeds.

 

The youngest of the three boys was Benjamin, whom they all called Ben. He was the only one in the household whose name was ever shortened. He was the only blond in the household; the other two boys had very dark brown hair. Ben was five years younger than Robert. He found himself excluded from his brothers’ activities to a great degree. Kerry and Robert had formed a rather close bond in early childhood, before Ben was born, and they remained pals and confidants throughout childhood. Ben tried to tag along with his brothers in the early days of his childhood but seemed to realize that he was an outsider, never able to become as accepted as he would have preferred. He found ways to entertain himself when the older boys ignored him.

 

Robert and Kerry loved their younger brother, of course, and were protective of him; they just preferred to not include him in their childhood play.

 

It was when Ben was four years old that the family became more concerned for his welfare. On the day after Easter Sunday, Ben had his new Easter basket in the back yard. He was pulling long grass along the fence behind the garage and placing it into his basket. An old neighbor lady walked down to visit Lila and Chauncey that morning. Ben saw her coming and began running toward her. He didn’t notice some twine on the ground, which tripped him. Falling forward, he put his hands in front of himself to stop his fall. His left hand fell, palm down, on a small sliver of steel, which had apparently fallen into the grass the previous fall when Chauncey had worked on a hay baler there. The steel severed some tendons of the hand, which flipped back into his wrist. The local doctor was unable to do more than ease the pain and stop the bleeding. He told Chauncey that it would be necessary to take Ben to Detroit for surgery.

 

Chauncey and Lila went twice a week to Detroit to visit Ben, leaving Robert and Kerry home to take care of chores. They were too young to visit Ben in the hospital, and neither of them liked the long drive to Detroit. Ben’s hand was never again completely functional after the surgery. The family became more protective of Ben from then on. Still, he was never able to become as close to either Kerry or Robert as they were to each other.

 

The family bond in Chauncey and Lila’s home was strong although unspoken. They seldom expressed affection in words, and not often in tender actions. Still, they all sensed that they were part of each other and everyone seemed secure in that.

 

When Lila came home from Montezuma and told Chauncey that Grandma Sullivan was getting worse, he scolded, swore and grumbled for a while, as Lila expected him to do. She suspected that he would cool down, though, and work with her to come up with some type of plan. After all, he had always prided himself in his vow that none of his family would end up in a nursing home if he could help it - - and Sarah Sullivan was considered a part of his family now. If she needed a home, he would arrange it somehow.

 

As Robert entered the kitchen after milking the only cow, which was now producing milk, he heard his parents discussing Grandma Sullivan. He eavesdropped as he strained the bucket of milk and poured two gallons of it into the pasteurizer to be processed before being refrigerated for the family’s use.

 

It was Lila speaking, “Ruth said she’s much worse since Billy left. She told me that Paul came in to check on Mom one day last week and found that she was burning the papers in the waste can, but she was burning them in the dining room. Chauncey, she’s going to hurt herself or maybe burn the house down if she’s left alone.”

 

After a couple of swear words, Chauncey asked, “It’s that hardening of the arteries in her head, ain’t it? They said it would get worse over time.”

 

Sadly, Lila continued, “Yes, she only remembers some things and only off and on. She sometimes calls me Ruth instead of Lila. While I was there, she said something about Dad being gone awfully late that day. I reminded her that Dad’s been dead for a long time. I could tell that it didn’t register when I said it. Her mind is gone.” She looked at Chauncey for a few seconds and added, “I can’t quit my job to move in with her, and the boys need me here anyhow. I don’t know what to do about her. And, I couldn’t afford a nursing home, even if I was willing to put her in one.”

 

“Let’s talk to Robert and Kerry about this. I can finish the middle bedroom upstairs for Ben. If he moves up there, you mom can use the downstairs room he’s been in.” Chauncey, true to Lila’s expectations, had cooled down and was ready to tackle the “family” problem. “You’ve got a lot of bills, I take it, so you can’t quit your job.”

 

Actually, it was Lila’s income, which provided most of the extras for the family’s use. True, Chauncey butchered a beef and a couple of hogs for the freezer every winter, and they had milk and chickens and eggs. Still, the carpeting on the floors and the reasonably nice furniture were present because Lila worked hard at the corrugated box factory and used her paychecks for these niceties. Birthdays and holidays were always celebrated in good fashion because of Lila’s income.

 

They decided to talk to the boys before making concrete plans for Grandma Sullivan, but Lila felt sure her husband would help in providing a home for her mother.

 

Not realizing that Robert was in the kitchen and listening to their conversation, Lila added, “Chauncey, good news. Today, as we were driving home from Ruth’s, Robert said he’s done with Sandra. He seems to have found a nice girl at Lester Chapel Church out there in the country, where Bill goes. I think he wished he could have gone there tonight, but it’s too late.”

 

Chauncey’s toothless grin, which Lila had grown to expect any time there was good news, was shining at the prospect of Robert and Sandra breaking up. His comment, though neither judgmental nor condoning, was, “Oh, yeah?” Lila understood that her man was concerned about their oldest son and that he seemed glad that the girlfriend situation was changing.

 

“Yes, it’s better for him to find a girl in church. I hope he lets us meet her before long,” sighed Lila.

 

Chapter 3: INFLUENCE OF A PENNY

 

 

As expected, Robert was faithful to the little Friends Meeting House on the First Day morning service, their way of expressing Sunday morning. Although a very small church, they were faithful to meet on Sunday mornings and to hold one or two revival meetings every year. Their small number of members and at tenders made it difficult to afford to have many services per week. As with many of the little congregations in the community, people attended their own churches on Sunday mornings and often attended neighboring churches on Sunday nights and prayer meetings nights. Robert usually attended four or five nights a week lately. He attended his own church on Sunday morning, usually Buckingham Community Church on Sunday night and since some churches had prayer meeting on Tuesday night, some on Wednesday night and some on Thursday night, Robert could go as often as five times a week if he so chose.

 

There were many churches he chose to attend besides his own. The Buckingham Church, about five miles away, was one of his favorites. The lady pastor was a Quaker, a member of the Society of Friends. However, the Buckingham Church was not of any denomination. Robert liked the messages the fervent little preacher lady brought. He did a lot of growing spiritually at her church, usually on First Day evenings. Too, she had three teenaged daughters and a son.

 

As Lila expected, Robert went to Lester Chapel on the following Sunday night although he had often been choosing Buckingham for his Sunday night services. Lester Chapel was a small church where many of the Lewis aunts and uncles attended. It was a member of a denomination, but that was seldom even mentioned from the pulpit. Their sentiment was, “We’re all here to worship God so why talk about names which may tend to divide us?”

 

Lila knew she should not ask too many questions when Robert returned home Sunday night. He tended to keep things to himself until he was ready to share news. She was hoping her son would find someone better than Sandra for his special friend, yet she felt it was improper for her to try to handle this area of his life for him. Although no longer claiming to a Christian, herself, she did breathe a prayer on Sunday night that Robert and this unnamed girl would begin communicating.

 

The unnamed girl of Lila’s prayer was Penny Spangler. She attended the Bible college in Adrian, about 25 miles away and felt close to the Bill Lewis family. Bill was Chauncey’ oldest brother. Bill and Beulah and their handicapped son were members of the Lester Chapel Church, and Bill was a Sunday School teacher. Sometimes, Penny spent the whole weekend with Bill and Beulah on their farm, which was about two miles from the church.

 

It seemed that Lila’s prayer was being answered this Sunday night. Penny had volunteered to lead in the half-hour children’s chapel, which was just before the evening service began. As Robert always got to services early, he experienced Penny’s attempt to bring a lesson to the children.

 

During the regular evening service, Robert allowed his mind to wander from time to time. He was thinking of this red-haired Penny. Her red hair had streaks of blond and brown in it, making a multi-colored head of hair, but the red was most noticeable.

 

Penny seemed so sincere, so uncomplicated, and so pretty. Her smile was easy. She was shorter than Robert’s five foot six height; she was slim, trim and proper, and seemed so cheerful. She had obvious talent as well. She played her clarinet during the song service. It was loud enough that he could hear it clearly over the 30 or so voices which were singing. She seemed quite committed to living a Christian life.

 

When opportunity was given for personal testimonies, Penny was the first one to stand to tell some things about her life. One piece of information which Robert noticed in her short testimonial was that she felt a call to become a missionary, to Africa. Her college classes were preparing her for a future as a missionary teacher.

 

Something beautiful was happening inside the chest of the young man who had decided to quit seeing the worldly-minded Sandra. As he had told his mother only three days earlier, God has a better plan for those who want to please their Lord.

 

After service that night, Robert lingered longer than usual to mingle with those who were there. Being naturally timid, he was hoping that Aunt Beulah would make an attempt to introduce this redhead to him. Finally, he took it upon himself to approach Penny and try to break the ice with a compliment. “That was a good lesson you gave for the children tonight,” he began. “Oh, by the way, my name is Robert Lewis.”

 

Penny’s winning smile removed the apprehension he had felt earlier about trying to meet her. Her smiling reply was clearly heartfelt, “I tried to bring what I felt God would help them to remember and use. Beulah says that some of these children seldom come to services so I wanted to give them something useful.” Continuing, she asked, “Lewis? Are you related to Bill and Beulah Lewis?”

 

“Yes, Bill is my dad’s brother.” Stammering a bit, Robert nervously went on, “So that makes Bill my uncle, yep, Uncle Bill and Aunt Beulah. I’m their nephew.”

 

Robert immediately realized that he had said nothing really profound in all his stammering. Feeling embarrassed, he suggested, “Maybe I’ll see you on prayer meeting night?”

 

“Usually, I don’t come during the week, being in college and all,” Penny explained. I need all the time I can find for my studying; I’m not a straight A student. I have to work hard for the grades I get.” Seeing what seemed like disappointment, Penny added, “But, I’ll have to see about Thursday night. If I’m caught up on homework, I may ride along to church with the pastor. No promises, though.”

 

“Sounds fair enough,” answered the young man. “See you Sunday night if not Thursday, OK?”

 

“I’ll be here if I can,” Penny answered as Robert headed toward the door. “Keep looking up. That’s where our help comes from. ‘Bye.”

 

Robert felt like flying, or screaming, or something to reveal his heart’s lightness. It was a short drive home.

 

Robert’s eight-mile drive to work each day was usually a time of devotion for him. He often reflected on some of the Bible verses he’d read before leaving for work; many times, he sang some of the old songs of the church as he drove.

 

The next few days, however, were different. He found himself thinking a lot about the young lady he’d talked to on Sunday night. His thoughts were sometimes light and hopeful as he recalled her cheery spirit and light way of expressing things. Sometimes, though, he was remembering her testimony about a call to service in Africa. Once, he found that he had slowed the car down to almost creeping speed. He had been so engrossed in thought about Penny that he was not paying enough attention to his driving.

 

Of course, on Thursday night, Robert was a Lester Chapel early. That was not unusual, though. He often had been a bit indignant that he got to the church before anyone else and sometimes waited in the car for a half hour or so before the regulars arrived. They were farm people and knew the church would be there when they arrived so they were never in a hurry to get there. This was upsetting to the punctual Robert. Usually, the pastor was the last to arrive as he drove 25 miles as he, too, was a student at the Bible college in Adrian.

 

This particular Thursday night, Robert wished the pastor would be early, but he was not. As usual, the song service was delayed because everyone felt they should wait for the pastor to be there before starting. Everyone, including Robert, was inside when the pastor finally arrived. The pastor came in, followed by his wife who was carrying their one-year-old son. She closed the door and came to the second pew from the front, her regular spot.

 

Robert’s heart sank. The excitement he had allowed to build up inside him was now ebbing away. He had hoped that Penny was as excited about the prayer service as he was and that she had applied extra time to her studies the last couple of days so that she would be free to come to the service on Thursday, but apparently, she had more to study than expected, or even worse, she’d not thought about him.

 

The, something thumped against the church door, and it opened. There was Penny, carrying her Bible and her clarinet. The clarinet case had bumped the door as she tried to turn the knob.

 

Energy pumped back into Robert, replacing the sense of depression, which had begun building when he thought that she had stayed behind at the college. The long wait for the church people to arrive, and then for the pastor to arrive, the long wait was now worth it - - he got to see Penny tonight!

 

Robert decided to try to ignore his natural timidity and have a more pointed conversation with Penny after the service ended. Going against some of his own principles, he spent a lot of time thinking during the service, thinking of how to open a conversation with Penny and thinking of what to say once the conversation got started. He even prayed silently that God would help him become acquainted with her. Surely, God would be pleased for him to at least try to get to know her better.

 

Actually, Penny made it easy for Robert. After the service, she approached him, asking, “Do you make music? I bring my clarinet every service; how about you, any instruments or a good singing voice?”

 

“And you do a good job on the clarinet, too,” Robert jumped into the conversation. Continuing, and answering her queries, “I took lessons on piano and was in the school band for a year, playing trombone. I don’t have a trombone, now, though, so I can’t bring it.”

 

The two soon found themselves rather isolated toward the back of the church and very much interested in sharing information about each other. It was easier that Robert had expected. Surely, God was answering his prayer, enabling him to get more acquainted with Penny.

 

The pastor finally interrupted, “Penny, I hate to spoil your fun, but I really have to be heading back home. Maybe you two should get together sometime outside of church - - no one to rush you. Just a thought.”

 

“And a good one, too,” Robert seized upon that opportunity to try to make a date with her. “Between my full-time job and my part-time studies at the community college, I’m kind of busy, but I know I could find time to drive over and see if you had time for a Dairy Queen. You think there would be any interest?”

 

“There’s always time for ice cream, Sir,” teased Penny. “I happen to know it’s about mid-term time, and by Saturday I should have an hour or so of free time.”

 

“Great! Here,” handing her an index card he’d stashed in his Bible, he suggested, “write down the address. What time? I’ll be there!”

 

Returning the card on which she had written an address, she said, “Not early. I sleep in every chance I get. Why not try around noon.”

 

“Noon it is. Have a good night...and a safe trip home.”

 

Her return trip to Adrian took around 35 minutes, riding back with the pastor and his family. Robert was home in less than ten minutes. How he wished it could have been a longer trip so he could spend time thinking, and yes, and praying a prayer of thanksgiving to God for helping with arranging the date with Penny.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked second shift, Robert had the rest of the evening to go to his room and rejoice. Ben and Kerry were engrossed in the TV in the living room downstairs. They hardly noticed that Robert didn’t even stop for a night time snack but went straight upstairs to his room.

 

The next morning, Lila was up before Robert left home for his job and then to school for the Friday session of an education course he was taking. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays were longer days for him, with the work and the late afternoon class at the community college.

 

Lila sneaked glances at Robert as he had his breakfast and got ready to leave for the day. She really wanted to know if he and this girl at Lester Chapel were showing any mutual interest in getting acquainted. She felt she knew her son rather well, although he tended to be quite secretive at times. She wasn’t sure but felt that perhaps she was seeing more grinning on Robert’s face this morning. How she wished he would talk sometimes, but she knew better than to pry into his personal life.

 

“Mom, I’ll be going to Adrian Saturday for a few hours, just thought you’d like to know,” Robert awkwardly announced. “I want to go see someone there.”

 

“Anything you want to tell me about it, Robert?” asked Lila, knowing it was futule to ask. She knew he would tell her what he wanted her to know, but it would be in his good time.

 

“Maybe, sometime. I got to get going, now,” was the brush off she received; she had expected that type of response. Robert would tell her more quickly if she just remained patient. Any nagging or prying would surely cause him to become much more cautious about revealing his thoughts.

 

It seemed like a long time from Thursday night to Saturday morning. Robert was busy enough with the job and his college class along with chores at home. Still, Friday night was not a church night except when one of the local churches happened to be in revival meetings. This was not the case this week so Friday night seemed long to him. Some time of reading, some praying, some sleeping , and a lot of daydreaming helped the night to finally come to an end.

 

Saturday morning, at last. Robert had hoped that his mother would sleep in this day, but she was up rather early, considering she had worked Friday night and did not get home until after midnight. Often, she and Chauncey both slept later on Saturday and Sunday mornings. Today, however, it was only Chauncey who slept late. Robert was uncomfortable, not knowing whether or not to tell his mother the purpose of the trip to Adrian today. This type of talk did not come easy for him.

 

Again, he felt lucky when Lila said that she had to go to town to get some groceries and some of the things they would need to get a room ready for Grandma Sullivan to move into. This news removed his obligation to do more talking than he wanted to do.

 

“I’ll be gone when you get back, Mom,” the relieved Robert said. “I should be back long before time to do the milking.”

 

“All right, Robert,” answered Lila. “Have a good time.”

 

He intended to do just that, have a good time, a good time with a pretty young lady, a good time that would honor God as well. He felt sure that there was a world of difference between Penny and the worldly Sandra, and for that he was thankful.

 

Robert was somewhat early arriving ad Adrian. It would have been out of character for him to have been late. It always irritated him to be late for anything. There had been times in the past when he had driven 40 or 50 miles to go to a special revival meeting or a missionary service only to notice , upon checking his watch, that he was a few minutes late. In some such instances, he turned the car around and returned home rather than go into the service late. Punctuality was almost an obsession with him. Too, today he wanted to be sure he could find the right house.

 

Penny was staying with an old friend of the family who happened to have an extra bedroom in her home. It was less expensive than staying in a dorm at the Bible college. Robert had no trouble at all finding the correct house, but he drove on by and parked a few blocks away to wait. After all, he was early, too early. It wouldn’t do to look too eager.

 

Penny, though, was still not ready at the appointed time. Actually, she was in character to not be punctual. Her rather carefree nature was not fond of schedules and timetables. When Robert knocked, the older lady with whom Penny was living answered and asked him in and entertained him for about fifteen minutes until Penny finally presented herself.

 

Robert learned a few things while waiting. The older lady explained a few things about her relationship with the Spangler family. She also inadvertently revealed some things, which Penny may or may not have revealed for quite some time. Robert figured that Penny would sometime get around to telling him, herself, but for now, he would just allow himself to enjoy the afternoon with her and learn all the good things he could about her.

 

They did go to the Dairy Queen, where Penny ordered largely. Robert had said that she should order anything she wanted. He was surprised, however, at how much she ordered and that she ate it all. How did she stay so slim?

 

After the meal, the two decided to go to a shopping mall just to have a comfortable, air- conditioned place to walk and talk. They both enjoyed the two hours they had together. Neither of them actually asked for much personal information, just general areas of mutual interest, which was largely in the area of Christian living and general thoughts as to what the future may hold.

 

Penny shared that she felt a missionary call, probably to Africa. She talked about some missionary books she had read. This opened the conversation to some of the reading, which Robert had done.

 

“Have you read Have We No Right?” Robert asked her. “I found it recently and am really concerned about some of the thoughts in it.”

 

Penny answered, “No, I usually read about missionary experiences rather than introspective books. I like the action books. One of the men I’ve read about a lot is Hudson Taylor.”

 

“Oh, Hudson Taylor’s Spiritual Secret. That was quite a book. Did you like it?” queried Robert.

 

“No I haven’t read it. Tell me more about it so I can decide if I want to read it.”

 

“It’s about his experiences in China, of course. I like how he tried to allow God to meet all his needs. If he needed something, he prayed and did nothing to make the thing happen himself,” said Robert. “Like once, he needed money to pay his rent, and his employer had forgotten to pay him, which seemed to be a regular pattern. Instead of telling his boss he needed the money, he asked God to remind him. Just in the knick of time, He did, too.”

 

“Do you really like that kind of thing?” Penny asked. “I prefer to just tell people if they owe me something, not take every little thing to God in prayer.”

 

“Don’t take me wrong in what I’m about to say,” began Robert. “I feel worship is more important than service. I think we need to be in an attitude of worship all the time, even if we are not doing some kind of Christian service. I think Hudson Taylor felt that way, too.”

 

“Maybe, but it’s not how I see it,” countered Penny. “I see service as an expression of worship.”

 

This conversation was the nearest thing to a disagreement that the young couple experienced during the entire afternoon.

 

All too soon, Robert had to offer to take Penny back to where she was staying, explaining that he had chores to do yet that night. Penny also felt she needed some time to get things done for the next week’s studies.

 

On the way back to St. Leon, Robert had a lot to think about. He wished Penny had felt like telling more about herself as he wanted to know a few things but realized that it isn’t proper to be too inquisitive.

 

What a great day this had been! God surely understood Robert and knew exactly who to bring into his life to bring joy. “Surely, this is the beginning of something outstandingly good,” thought Robert as he neared their farm near St. Leon.

 

Chapter 4: Grandma's Impact

 

 

Lila and Chauncey decided that they had no choice but to take Grandma Sullivan into their home, giving her the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had been using. The move was not accomplished the next week as Lila had planned; it took three weeks to get ready.

 

Lila decided to go get her mother on Saturday so that one of the boys could go along to help. They were not moving all the old furniture that was in Grandma’s house as they did not have enough room, and also because it was not in good condition. The children had all been contacted during the previous weeks, and all of them agreed that they should try to sell the old house and furniture as it was certain that Sarah Sullivan would never move back in.

 

Lila took Ben with her to go get Grandma. He did not like the trip from Michigan to Ohio, but he wanted to be as supportive of his parents as he could. He wanted Lila to let him drive part of the way, but as he was only fourteen, she put him off. “Just wait until you begin Driver’s Ed,” she promised. “Then, I’ll probably force you to drive every time I want to go anywhere.”

 

Lila and Ben were able to converse a little as they drove to Montezuma. In time, Ben managed to air his complaint about Grandma’s move into their home. “You know, I’m probably losing more than anyone else. See, I had to move into that middle bedroom upstairs so that Grandma can have my old room. Mom, that room has no windows. And, besides, Kerry and Robert have to go through my room to get to theirs so I have no privacy at all. It’s no fun being the so-called baby of the family, you know that?”

 

“I’m sorry it’s working out like this, Son,” consoled Lila. “If Robert or Kerry move out or get married or whatever, you can take the room they leave behind. I wish I could promise you more than that.”

 

 

 

“Why can’t somebody else take Grandma; why is it us?” whined Ben. “I haven’t seen her for over a year, I think, and she didn’t even know me then. This won’t be fun.”

 

Lila agreed, “It will be hard for all of us, Ben. With me working nights and your dad on nights, too, you boys will have your hands full sometimes. I can’t afford to hire someone to come in and cook for her and watch over her. It’s not fair of me to ask you young men to do this - - I just don’t have any answers.” She was about to cry, it appeared.

 

“It’s OK, Mom,” consoled her youngest. “Robert is good at cooking, and usually at least one of us is at home most of the time. We’ll make it. Something will work out, I hope, at least.”

 

When they arrived at Montezuma, Ruth and Paul, Lila’s oldest sister and youngest brother, were there, and Sarah was packed. Boxes were all around the living room, boxes which contained all the possessions which Sarah had collected over the years. Most of the items were quite old and would bring little at the auction they planned to have in a few weeks.

 

Grandma Sullivan had no idea what was actually going on as they packed her and the few belongings which would go with her into Lila’s station wagon.

 

 

 

“Where’s Robert?” asked Sarah. “He should be here now I would think.”

 

Ben spoke up in an attempt to answer his grandmother, “He couldn’t come, Grandma; I came instead.”

 

Lila tried to clear up Ben’s lack of understanding. “Ben, she means Grandpa, not Robert, your brother. She’s confused and doesn’t always realize that Grandpa’s dead.”

 

“Oh! Ok, I guess,” Ben raised his eyebrows in disbelief of this situation but said nothing more to Sarah. Clearly, young Ben could see lots of problems ahead, for him and for his brothers, not to mention his mother.

 

They got Sarah to their home and settled into the downstairs bedroom, which Ben had claimed up to a few days ago. She had to be told many times where to find the bathroom and how to get back to her bedroom.

 

Sarah Sullivan was not content sitting around. She had been a hard worker all her life and felt the need to be busy. They found her in the kitchen a lot, trying to wash any dishes she could find. There was no way to reason with her, to make her understand that the dishes would be done when there were more of them to do. Someone had to physically lead her back into the living room or to her bedroom. It was clear to all of the family that Grandma was going to be a lot of trouble. They all realized that she was not to blame, but they knew that problems lay ahead.

 

Robert and Kerry came in from doing their chores shortly after Lila and Ben arrived and got Grandma settled into her room. They tried to make friendly talk to her but quickly realized that she understood little, if anything, that they were trying to say.

 

As Robert strained the milk and put some into the pasteurizer, and as Kerry washed up, Lila and Chauncey had a chance to talk about the situation.

 

“Chauncey, while the boys are busy, let me tell you what Ruth and Paul said,” began Lila.

 

Chauncey looked up at her with concern as he rolled a cigarette paper full of Half And Half tobacco. “Yeah?” He was a man of few words, at least when doing serious business.

 

Lila continued, not realizing, yet not really caring, that Robert and Kerry were both hearing her as she spoke, “Ruth said she and Paul talked about it and called all the other kids. They decided to make me the legal guardian of Mom. I have a letter from them to take to the courthouse and to the Social Security. It declares me to be her guardian *[space]and gives me permission to sign her name on checks and to do her business.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” was the response from her husband. “How is the money to be used?”

 

“That’s it, Chauncey,” explained Lila. “They realize that Mom is going to be a great burden on us. They want me to have the social security checks for our needs as we take care of her.”

 

“So, what will you do with it? Buy her clothes and medicine, or what?”

 

“For one thing, I can now hire someone part time to take care of her while I work at night, maybe three or four hours a night, to keep her company and giver her her baths and see she gets her medicine at night,” explained Lila.

 

Kerry walked into the kitchen as Robert finished with the milk. “Did you hear that?”

 

“Yep, the Sullivans are taking care of their own,” answered Robert, “just as I figured they would. Makes me proud to in the family.”

 

“Maybe!” Ben’s entrance and the one-word response surprised Kerry and Robert.

 

“What do you mean ‘maybe’?”, asked Robert. “You’re part of the family, too, you know.”

 

“Right!” mocked Ben. “I’m the least member, getting booted out of my room and into the dungeon with no windows.”

 

“Oh! I’ve thought about that; it’s got to be hard for you,” said Robert. “I know I wouldn’t like a room with no windows, and it’s not really private, either, is it?”

 

“Oh, you noticed?” sneered Ben again. He walked away, clearly discouraged by the way the arrival of Grandma was affecting him and his life.

 

All Kerry and Robert could do was look at each other, wondering what could be done to make Ben’s lot easier.

 

It took a while for Lila to find someone to hire for three hours each weekday evening to get Grandma bathed and settled into bed. In the meantime, the boys were uneasy as they tried to shoulder the responsibility of watching over her. Lila arranged to get off work at ten o’clock each night, as a temporary solution. The boys watched over their grandmother until Lila got home to bath her and get her into bed. It was a burden for them, it cut into their plans for some evenings, it made Ben even more upset, but this was family, and they endeavored to make the best of the necessary inconvenience.

 

Robert had to miss some weekday church services for the two weeks that it took to find a neighbor whom Lila could hire. He spent more time in his bedroom, reading and thinking, thinking of the copper-haired Penny.

 

On the next Sunday night, he was at Lester Chapel, as one would expect. Amazing as it seems, the pastor arrived early to that service, along with his family and Penny. They had been invited to spend the Sunday with one of the church families so he did not have to make the double trip from Adrian to the church.

 

After the service, it was more natural for Robert and Penny to find themselves together, more natural than it had been two weeks earlier.

 

After some brief small talk, Penny announced, “I’m spending all next weekend with your aunt and uncle. I have Friday off at school so I will stay from Thursday, after prayer meeting until Sunday night. Then, I’ll go back to Adrian with the pastor. Thought you’d like to know.”

 

“For sure! Wow! That’s great news!” blurted Robert. He was already wondering if his mom would care to fix Sunday dinner for one more person. He wouldn’t say anything to Penny until he got Mom’s permission.

 

The two visited a while, until the pastor announced his need to be heading back to Adrian. Robert watched them drive away and didn’t notice his Aunt Beulah walking toward him.

 

“You hear the news, Robert?” Beulah asked loudly. She was the type who did everything loudly. “Penny’s going to be my girl for a few days. Maybe you should come over, too.”

 

“Maybe I should. I’ll give it some serious thought,” he answered.

 

`Since Lila didn’t get off until midnight, now that they had a lady taking care of Grandma, Robert decided to wait up rather than get to bed. Only one more day of work remained for the week; surely, he could get by on less sleep for one day. He felt the need of talking to his mother.

 

“You’re still up?” asked the surprised Lila. “Is there anything wrong?” Seeing the grin on Robert’s face, she answered her own question. “It doesn’t look like it, the way you’re all lit up. What’s going on?”

 

The usually timid Robert didn’t beat around the bush about what was on his mind. “Mom, would it be OK to have someone for dinner Sunday? The girl I told you about, the one at Lester Chapel, well, she’s spending the weekend with Bill and Beulah. I wondered if I could invite her to - -”

 

“I insist!” interrupted Lila. “I want to meet her. I can put on another plate between you and Ben.”

 

A voice interrupted her. Kerry had heard them talking and got up to find out what was so important. “You mean, between Robert and Kerry. It it’s a girl, she gets to sit beside the real man of the family; that’s me,” joked Kerry.

 

Lila announced, “So, it’s settled. You invite her, Robert, and I’ll put her plate between you and Kerry.” With that, they all went to bed in good spirits, looking forward to meeting Robert’s special friend on Sunday.

 

As one would expect, Robert was at Lester Chapel for the Thursday night service, and early, as usual. He still did not have the nerve to suggest that he and Penny could sit together in church. After all, church is for worship, not for distractions. Sitting with her would probably cause some distraction, at least for a while. Besides, he didn’t know if he would be welcome to sit with her anyhow; he had never asked her.

 

They visited after church and arranged to take Penny to his home to meet his family on Saturday. That way, it would not be so awkward on Sunday.

 

The family all knew before Saturday that they should try to be around home in the mid afternoon. Even Ben seemed less moody when he heard that Robert had a new girlfriend whom they would all meet on Saturday.

 

“I want to explain something before we get to my home,” began Robert as he opened the car door for Penny on Saturday. He had gone to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. They decided to just drive around a while. He wanted her to see where he worked and where he was taking a college class. Really, he just wanted to be with her. He felt he needed to tell her what to expect from his grandmother. “My grandma just moved in with us a few weeks ago.”

 

“That’s wonderful,” the exuberant Penny exclaimed. “I like older people. They have so much to share which I can learn from.”

 

“Not this time,” countered Robert. “The reason she is with us is that she can’t be alone at all any more. She has some type of artery problem in her head. She’s not sensible at all any more. She doesn’t even know my name or even my mom’s name. She usually forgets that Grandpa died eight years ago.”

 

With an understanding look, Penny acknowledged, “I have worked in hospitals and nursing homes. I’ve seen this type of behavior before so I won’t be shocked or offended by your grandmother. I’m sure she is sweet even if not really alert any more. Don’t be worried about how it will affect me,” advised Penny. “I’m considering getting training as a registered nurse after I get my teaching degree.”

 

“A little more information about this remarkable young lady,” thought Robert. “She’s amazing! A teacher and a nurse, both in the same person. I don’t deserve someone so talented.”

 

Meeting Robert’s parents and two brothers did not phase the exuberant Penny at all; nothing ever seemed to intimidate her. She was bubbly, laughing and joking a lot, really enjoying the hour in their home. She asked Robert about the piano so he coaxed his mother to play a couple of songs. She played a polka and a song that she called Now Is The Hour.

 

When she had finished that one, Penny said, “Oh, that last one is a church song, isn’t it? I like that one a lot.”

 

Lila responded, “No, we heard it a lot at some of the wedding receptions we’ve gone to the last few years for members of the Lewis family. It’s always the last song of the night, and the bride and groom dance in the center of the floor while other serious couples dance around them. The words are something like ‘Now is the hour, when we must say good bye’.”

 

Robert interrupted, “Mom, I think it is used in churches, too, but with different words. That’s where Penny heard the melody.”

 

Penny picked up the conversation, “Right. The words of the church song, if I can remember, are ‘Search me, Oh Lord, and know my heart today. Try me, Oh Savior; know my thoughts, I pray.’ I really don’t remember all the words, but it has been encouraging for me to pray that way at times.”

 

During this conversation, no one had noticed Grandma Sullivan until she began waving her hands and crying. Although crying, she had a big smile on her wrinkled old face. She would have been singing, no doubt, but she no longer knew how.

 

“Look at Grandma!” Robert said. “It looks like she thinks she is in church. Maybe she knew that song, too.”

 

Lila took over, “She was a good Christian and raised all of us in church. Some of us have left the training she and Grandpa gave us, but we can’t forget how we lived when we were young.” Discreetly wiping her eyes, she went on, “I know she no longer has her right mind, but I’m sure she is headed for God’s Heaven; I just know it!”

 

Again, Robert was so pleased with this element of his heritage being displayed in the presence of the young lady he was becoming fond of. Penny’s understanding smile made her so attractive, even more so when she got up and walked over to Sarah Sullivan and bowed down to give her a kiss on the wrinkled forehead.

 

It was a great afternoon! That was Robert’s judgment of the occasion of the meeting between Penny and his family. Everyone seemed pleased. Even Chauncey, who appeared for only about ten minutes, seemed entranced by her spirit, her jolly disposition and her quickness to become friendly. Ben watched from a distance, not actually entering into many of the activities. Clearly, he was impressed with the girl whom Robert had chosen.

 

As Robert was about to leave with Penny, Lila spoke, “Do you have any favorite foods I can fix for tomorrow? I mean, Robert said he had invited you for lunch so I want it to be special for you.”

 

“Anything! I enjoy eating. I’m sure your country-style cooking will suit me fine,” answered Penny with her hands and her eyes speaking along with her lips.

 

Grandma somehow sensed that Penny was about to leave with Robert. She arose from the chair with some difficulty and approached Penny. She tried to say something, but it did not make sense. Then, she gave Penny the best bear hug that an old lady of her condition could possibly give. “I want to pray for you, Ruth,” Grandma said. “And, I’ll sing it, too. Will you?”

 

Although this did not make any sense to anyone present, and although she called Penny by the wrong name, everyone realized that Grandma was somehow expressing great feeling for the petite young lady at Robert’s side.

 

“I’ll pray for you tonight, Grandma,” said Penny, not at all bothered by Grandma’s communication problems. Looking at the rest of the people in the room, she added, “I’ll pray for all of you, too. You seem to be such a happy family. I’ll ask God to give you the one thing which could make you even happier, and that is His Presence in your lives.” Looking at Robert, she went on, “Well, I’m ready, driver. I can’t come back again if I don’t leave, so let’s go.”

 

As they went out the front door, Penny spoke again, “I’ll see you all tomorrow, God willing. Bye-bye.”

 

Grandma was still up. She walked to the door and watched as Robert opened the car door for Penny. She watched as they drove off, then said, “I like him. He’s a good girl.”

 

“Yeah, we all like . . . him,” remarked Ben with mockery showing on his face, “Him?” Clearly, Ben’s youthfulness did not allow for the errors of the senile. He went out to sit in the lawn chair, wishing something good would happen in his life. His self pity was becoming more and more directed at Grandma. If she hadn’t moved in, he would still have his own bedroom instead of the semi-private dungeon upstairs.

 

Chapter 5: Influence of the Quakers (Friends)

 

 

Robert wondered if it would ever be possible to get Penny to visit his church on First Day morning services. When he felt a little more secure in their relationship, he would ask her to visit the St. Leon Friends Church.

 

His church - - why did he call it his? For one thing, he became a follower of the Lord Jesus in that meetinghouse. He and both brothers were forced to attend Sunday School there for the last few years. Lila and Chauncey never attended, unless they had made a rash promise to the pastor to attend a revival service. They did, however, insist that the boys go every Sunday morning. It was the church where Grandma Lewis had been attending for much of her life. Also, Lila understood it to be less liberal than the other church in town.

 

By now, Robert had been a Christian long enough and had lived a noticeably good life that the Ministry and Oversight Committee decided to put his name up for an office in the Sunday School. He was nominated for assistant superintendent of the Sunday School and was nearly unanimously elected. This helped to make it his church.

 

Although Lila tended to object, Robert had asked to become a member of the church. After the waiting period was finished, his name joined the twenty-three others listed as members of the local Friends Meeting.

 

He had suggested to the Ministry and Oversight Committee members that they needed more than just the one service per week. That suggestion did not go beyond the committee as they felt the expense was too much.

 

Only a few of the twenty-three members were living in the community now. They kept their membership even if they moved far away, usually because they wished to be buried in the church’s cemetery with their family members. Of the few members who did attend regularly, most were retired and on fixed incomes and could not support the church too well.

 

The meetinghouse was old, a very tall structure with high ceilings inside. That meant the heating bill was quite a problem for the treasurer. They paid a pastor to drive from Adrian on Sunday mornings. They had utilities to pay. They always provided good literature for Sunday School classes and take home papers to be read on Sunday afternoons. The summertime months required payment of a neighbor to mow the church and cemetery lawns. Robert really did understand that they needed to be cautious in their spending.

 

He finally decided that it had apparently been good that they were not having evening services any longer. Because of this fact, he had been attending neighboring churches (except on First Day mornings). And, because of attending Lester Chapel Church, he had met Penny.

 

Robert had great respect and love for many of the people at his church. He especially was drawn to an eighty-year-old man named L.G. Wibel. Brother Wibel had been an evangelist in his younger days and was now retired. He was the teacher for the old folks’ class. As assistant superintendent, Robert had the privilege of visiting any classes he chose. He chose Brother Wibel’s class often.

 

“Paul and Timothy”, that’s what he overheard a couple of the women say one day. They were not being secretive but were expressing admiration. When they realized that Robert had heard them, they explained.

 

Eula explained while the other sister nodded agreement, “We just said it reminds us of Paul and Timothy, in the Bible. You know, Paul was the aged preacher, but one of his closest friends was Timothy, the young convert. We think you and Brother Wibel resemble those two.”

 

After considering a while, Robert seemed to agree. He was spending a lot of time at the Wibel home. They lived in the town where he worked. Often, Robert chose to grab a quick bite to eat on his whole hour of lunch break. He then had a half hour or more to spend with the Wibels before returning to his job for the rest of the day.

 

Robert learned a lot in Wibels’ home. Quite often, Mr. Wibel went over his thoughts about the upcoming Sunday School lesson when Robert visited them on his lunch hour. When it seemed like a really interesting lesson, Robert usually decided to sit in on the old folks’ class for Sunday School.

 

That’s how it was this week. The lessons for the last few weeks had been focused on Quaker beliefs, practices and history. Robert was fascinated by L.G. Wibel’s interpretation of the teachings of George Fox, who founded the Society of Friends and of the teachings of John Wesley, the founder of Methodism. Robert was not yet aware that some of the beliefs of those two men of the past were not in full agreement. Besides, Brother Wibel was not about to point out the differences between the doctrines of the two.

 

On Sunday morning, Robert secretly wished Penny could be with him to hear his dear friend (a friend and a Friend). No doubt, she would enjoy his eye-opening teachings as much as he did.

 

Often, Brother Wibel used a version of a phrase to emphasize Bible teachings. It was, “That’s Bible teaching, not Wibel teaching”. He used it a lot this week, explaining that some of George Fox’s thoughts were not explicit in the Bible but were inferred. When he was in agreement with Fox, he would say, “That’s Wibel, not Bible”. Robert liked that; it made the honesty of Brother Wibel more evident.

 

It was a great lesson. Robert hoped he could share some of the thoughts with Penny later that day. It did seem a little different from the thoughts of some other people. Yet, Brother Wibel made everything seem so much in line with Bible teachings.

 

After church that morning, Robert did not linger to visit as he usually was in a habit of doing. Instead, he was clearly in a hurry to drive the six miles to Lester Chapel Church to pick up his lunch guest.

 

And, she was waiting. Beulah and Bill and their son were waiting with her, knowing that Robert would arrive as soon as he could get away from the Friends Church. How great to see the copper-haired Penny!

 

“Hola!” she yelled before he got the car stopped. She was walking toward his old car and opened the door herself, before he had time to get out and open it for her. “Com esta?” she asked.

 

“Hi!” answered Robert. “I guess that’s Spanish, right? How you doing? Ready to go, I see.” Then, waving to Bill and Beulah, he drove off with his prize.

 

Penny followed Robert into the house and greeted everyone she saw, even stopping to kiss Grandma. “Hi, Grandma,” she greeted. “How’s it going today? Do you remember me?”

 

Sarah Sullivan looked at her with a confused smile and started to make wordy sounds, which no one really understood.

 

“That’s OK, Grandma,” comforted Penny. “My name’s Penny. I was here yesterday, remember?”

 

The response was a somewhat blank, “Yeah.”

 

Lila came out from the kitchen with flour on her hands and invited Penny to join her, “It’s not proper to ask the guest to help, but I thought you might want to be part of the cooking team.”

 

Exuberant, Penny accepted the invitation, “Oh, I never get a chance to cook. I’d love to help. What can I do?”

 

Robert went to his room to deposit his Bible and take off his suit jacket as Penny joined his mother. When he got back downstairs and into the kitchen, he saw Penny with her hands in the noodle dough, all covered with flour and trying to roll the dough out to be cut into noodles. He had seen his mother doing that hundreds of times. In fact, he often made the noodles himself, anymore.

 

Lila was talking, as usual, “Maybe the noodle dough looks kind of rich. That’s because I made an angel food cake. Angel food cakes take thirteen egg whites so I use the thirteen yolks for the noodles. My boys love the rich noodles that result from only the yolks.”

 

Looking at Penny’s attempts, Lila decided to come to her rescue. Penny had rolled out the dough on the floured counter top. However, instead of cutting the dough into squares to be piled on top of each other so that many noodles could be cut at once, she was cutting one noodle at a time.

 

“Here, Dear. Let me show you how I do it.” Lila cut the dough into eight inch squares and stacked several on top of each other and cut down through the stack a few times, making uniform noodles for the broth. “That may be easier for you, if you want to try it that way.”

 

Ben had been watching and just rolled his eyes in a mocking fashion. Robert saw him mouth, “Dumb blond.”

 

Not much embarrassed, Penny said, “I don’t cook much. My mom never wanted us kids to bother when she cooked. And, she always said that I do everything backwards.” Looking up to see if anyone was laughing at her and noticing nothing of the sort, she continued, laughing, “Mom said I even mop the floor wrong. She said I wring the mop the wrong direction. That’s silly, I think. How can you wring the mop wrong?”

 

No one really knew how to answer so they just chuckled along with her.

 

When Lila called everyone to come to eat, Penny went in to lead Grandma to the kitchen. Everyone was quickly around the table and clearly about to begin filling plates, but Lila stopped the activities.

 

“I know we don’t usually do this, but we have a guest, Robert’s friend,” she announced. “I wondered if I could ask Penny to say a table grace before we eat.”

 

Kerry and Ben both raised eyebrows at the suggestion but paused to see what would happen. Chauncey, who usually waited until everyone in the family got their plates filled before he took any food, just remained patient, as usual.

 

Penny warmly accepted the invitation to have a short prayer to thank God for the food. After her prayer, they began their noisy chatter as the bowls of food circled the table.

 

Kerry, who considered himself a gift to women, felt the need to explain, “Penny, did you notice that you’re between the two men of the family? That was my idea. I’m showing Robert how to treat a lady.”

 

“Yes, I noticed,” Penny answered. “How lucky can I get to be surrounded by these three gentlemen.” Ben noticed that she glanced at him as she spoke. Clearly, she was including him. It was a good feeling, even if it was the ‘dumb blond’ who was providing the inclusion for him.

 

The first meal with Penny as guest was a joyous occasion for everyone, especially Penny. Although no one remarked about it at the time, most of the Lewis family noticed that Penny ate quite heartily. In fact, she refilled her plate several times, remarking on the cooking skills of Lila.

 

“I just love to eat,” she announced unnecessarily.

 

Everyone except Grandma and Ben were involved from time to time in the mealtime conversation. Penny learned some things about their family, and they learned a few things about her plans for nursing school after getting a teaching degree.

 

“Are your parents living?” Lila finally asked Penny. She had hoped the information would come out in the conversation more naturally, but since it did not, she decided to become direct about getting some background.

 

“Yes,” answered Penny. “My mom lives in Bay City. My dad is remarried and lives in Midland. I see Mom about once a month.”

 

Robert figured this was a chance to get some background information which he had wondered about for some time. He joined into the questioning, “Are they retired?”

 

Penny seemed quite willing to share some of the family history. “Not Mom. She cleans in a nursing home there at Bay City. She hopes to get social security in a few years and then retire.”

 

“And your dad?” Robert interrogated.

 

The response was not quick to this last question. Penny was obviously weighing her words before speaking. Finally, she answered, “I’m not sure. Like I said, “ I don’t see him a lot.” Seeing that her answer was rather incomplete, she added, “My dad used to be a pastor. After he and Mom broke up the home, I lost contact with him, especially when he remarried about five years later. We didn’t have much material goods when I was a child, and I feel my dad could have done better.” She paused a long while, making for some uncomfortable silence around the table. She then added, “He’s sick, I think. My youngest sister, Janet, keeps in touch with him and has told me that he has leukemia.”

 

Robert felt the atmosphere was getting too tense so he decided to change the subject. “Penny, I think you would have liked the Sunday School lesson I heard this morning at my church. I wish you could have been there.”

 

This subject change was not a move which made everyone feel comfortable. Ben rolled his eyes and decided to be excused, telling Lila that he was going to the neighbor boy’s house to practice his music. Chauncey got up and walked to his favorite chair in the living room to smoke. Kerry, too, said a few polite words and excused himself for other pursuits. Only Robert, Penny, Lila and Grandma stayed around the table.

 

With few people around to hear her, Penny decided to reveal her thoughts about Robert’s wish for her to attend the St. Leon Friends Church. She began, “I don’t know how to say this, but I really do not want to attend that church. They have some ideas that I really don’t accept. I’m sure some of the people are good people, but I feel they have some problems in their practices.”

 

Robert was not prepared for this type of announcement; it surprised him a great deal. He had not figured that Penny was so outspoken. Too, he had no idea that anyone could find something wrong with the church which had been so instrumental in his becoming a Christian and in his spiritual growth.

 

“What?” inquired Robert. “I have seen nothing wrong with the Quakers. They seem just like the people at Lester Chapel and at Buckingham Church. In fact, the lady who pastors at Buckingham is a Quaker, too. What have I overlooked in the Friends people?”

 

Not wanting to open a Pandora’s Box of problems, Penny skirted the areas of her concern with, “Let’s discuss it another time. For now, just borrow one of the disciplines of Lester Chapel Church and compare it with that of the St. Leon Friends. I think you’ll see some big differences.”

 

Both Lila and Penny were eager to end the conversation for now. No one wanted to ruin this good day with talk of religious differences.

 

Penny suggested, “Let me help with the dishes, Mrs. Lewis.”

 

Lila countered with, “No, I and Grandma will do them a little later. And, call me Lila, OK?”

 

Before any response was possible, the telephone rang. Lila went to answer it and with a concerned look, offered the receiver to Penny, saying, “It’s for you, Penny.”

 

 

 

Lila led Grandma to the living room, and Robert followed, allowing Penny some privacy for the call.

 

After a couple of minutes, Penny entered the living room. The call was finished. No one wanted to ask her about it as it was her business, not theirs.

 

Penny said, “That was Ramona on the phone, Ramona Santana. She’s one of my college friends. She said that my dad called the emergency number at school and says I should call him soon. She gave me the number.”

 

“Go ahead and call from our phone,” offered Lila. “We won’t bother you. I want you to use it.”

 

“No,” replied Penny. “He knows I don’t want to talk to him. He should not be calling me; he needs to let me call him if I ever decide I want to.”

 

“But, maybe it’s a family emergency,” suggested Robert. “You should at least find out.”

 

“He’s tricky,” said Penny. “Ramona says that he claims it has something to do with my younger sister, Julie. I doubt there’s anything to it. See, Julie is really close to my dad, but she doesn’t live any better than he does. She’s divorced, has a son, and lives a pretty wicked life. I think it is some kind of trick to make me talk to Dad.”

 

No one knew what to do except let Penny make the decision to ignore the call from her father. Robert felt that she should have at least tried one call, but he allowed it to be her decision.

 

They visited another hour or so. Then, Robert drove Penny back to Bill and Beulah’s house, promising to see her at the evening service.

 

As he drove back home, it occurred to Robert that he had not been attending the Buckingham Church nearly as often as he had formerly done. Since meeting Penny, he attended the Friends Church and Lester Chapel most of the time. He had found someone who was beginning to be important in his life. Surely, this was of God. Surely, it was becoming about time for Robert to find a church home and settle down to serve and worship in one particular church rather than drift from one to another as he had been doing.

 

If so, which church should be his? Was there really something about the St. Leon Friends Meeting that he should have noticed, something which marked it as a less-than-perfect group with which to be associated?

 

Chapter 6: The Importance of a Gift

 

 

Robert went to Lester Chapel Church for the Sunday evening service as he had told Penny he would do. His mind was busy, more so than usual, throughout the service. He did not actually concentrate on the service as much as he normally was in the practice of doing.

 

It was not an easy thing to simply shake off the feeling of confusion about the telephone call which Penny had received only a few hours earlier. Robert could understand the idea of not feeling close to a parent. He, himself, did not feel close to his father and never had felt the bond that some sons feel with their fathers. Still, if his dad had called him with a desperate-sounding message, Robert felt sure that he would give it serious consideration. He was sure that he would return such a call. Penny’s refusal to return her father’s call seemed less than honorable. She must have some pretty terrific problems in her background to have such negative feelings for her father and her sister.

 

He wondered if Penny would request prayer about the situation when the pastor asked if anyone had requests. She did not.

 

After the service ended, the two of them got together as everyone expected them to do anymore. In fact, the pastor’s wife suggested, “Robert, why don’t you sit with Penny during the services? I mean, we all know that you are seeing a lot of each other - - just a suggestion.”

 

Robert glanced toward Penny, just to see if there was any type of reaction. She had a big smile. By that, he knew that she had been wondering the same thing.

 

“OK, I will,” promised Robert a bit shyly. “I see no reason not to. Just watch, Thursday night I’ll be up front and on the right side of the aisle instead of where I usually sit.”

 

“Attaboy!” shrieked Beulah. Robert doubted if she even knew how to speak in a softer voice.

 

As Robert and Penny used the last few moments to talk together before the pastor announced his need to be leaving, Robert could not help but say something about the phone call which Penny had received earlier.

 

“I was praying for you this afternoon,” he told her. “I even forgot to squirt the cat with milk this evening while I was milking the cow. I squirt her every evening but forgot this time. I was thinking and sort of praying in my mind.”

 

“Why?” she asked. “Have I done something to make you doubt my spirituality?” It was a question in jest; she was as jolly as usual, apparently having forgotten the call.

 

“No,” he answered. “You know, about the call. It may be really an urgent problem in your family. So, I decided to do all that I know to do, and that is to talk to God about it.”

 

Losing her big smile momentarily, Penny said, “I and my sister, Julie, have not spoken for over a year and a half. I love her a lot, but she decided that there’s something about me that does not deserve any love and respect from her. I don’t know what my dad is up to, but it sounds kind of strange to me.” She paused, thinking deeply. Then, with a return of her big smile, she continued, “If there’s anything really serious, and if I find out about it, I’ll let you know. OK?”

 

“OK. If you say so,” replied the young man as he tried to remove any signs of worry from his countenance.

 

Of course, Lila was up when he got home from the service, and she wanted to know if he learned anything more.

 

“Not much, Mom,” Robert told her. “She said that she and her sister haven’t been on good terms for over a year. Penny thinks her dad is tricking her in some way. Really, I don’t understand their situation at all. I’m going to pray about it a lot, though, just in case it is serious.”

 

Robert worked the next four days and did the usual things, milking the cow at night, studying for his one college class a while, and even attended the Buckingham prayer service on Wednesday night.

 

The small crowd of worshippers at Buckingham Church were surprised when Robert came through the doors that Wednesday night.

 

“Well, the prodigal has come home,” teased Sister Liming, the pastor of the little community church. “We about gave up on seeing you again, Robert.”

 

“Sorry, but I’ve been spreading myself too thin and decided to try to settle down and try to find one church to call my home church,” he explained, feeling a bit guilty.

 

She gave him a quick, little hug and said, “I was only joshing, Brother Lewis. We really are glad to see you here tonight. We think a lot of you and want God’s best for you always.”

 

Several voices expressed agreement with Mrs. Liming’s sentiments. Robert felt quite at home here, as he always had. After all, although the church was not officially of any denomination, Mrs. Liming and her family were all very much Quakers. At that thought, Robert again briefly wondered about the few negatively toned expressions which came from Penny the previous Sunday around the lunch table.

 

When prayer time came around, Robert stood to his feet. “I have a concern which I would like for all of you to remember as you pray tonight,” he said. “I don’t feel I should say any more about it at this time. Let’s just say it is an unspoken prayer request. God knows what it is. I will appreciate your prayers.”

 

“Of course,” agreed the lady pastor. She was a model of propriety at all times, very professional, very discreet and very concerned about the few people whom she felt God had entrusted to her care. “God knows what this need is. We will remember Robert’s request as we pray. Does anyone else have an expression of need?” Seeing none, she suggested, “As many of us who can, let us kneel for our time of prayer tonight. I’ll not ask anyone in particular to lead the prayer. Just feel free to obey the Spirit.”

 

This was very much the custom anyhow, both here at Buckingham and at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. Often, the time of prayer lasted twenty minutes or even longer. And, Robert loved this part of the service. One person would usually feel he or she should pray aloud. After this prayer, often there would be a few minutes of silence until another worshipper felt that God would be pleased to have him voice his petitions toward Heaven. It was typical Quaker style. Usually, Robert did not pray aloud. Perhaps he was too shy. Perhaps he was afraid his words would not be the best words for the occasion. He seldom prayed aloud. And even this night at Buckingham, he prayed silently when he was not listening in on another person’s prayer. He was praying for Penny and about the phone call. He knew no more so could not pray very explicitly. He echoed what he heard in Sister Liming’s prayer, that God’s will would be accomplished in the situation.

 

The next day, which would be called ‘fifth day’ by the Quakers, Robert was eager for evening to arrive. He felt sure that Penny would try to be present in the prayer service at Lester Chapel. Just before he left home, he received a phone call. He felt uneasy about it but answered, suspecting it may be from Penny. It wasn’t.

 

When he answered the phone, he heard his mother’s familiar voice, “Robert, Son, it’s Mom. I aimed to leave a note on the table for you but forgot. I wondered if you would want to invite Penny to come for Thanksgiving Dinner at our home. What do you think?”

 

“I think it sounds great!” he answered. “Her family is so far away, and I’m sure she has little money for traveling very far. I’ll ask her if she’s there tonight.”

 

“And, I know it’s not my business, but I’d like to know if something bad has happened in her family,” Lila said with some hesitation.

 

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything, Mom,” he replied. “It’s OK. I think we are all kind of anxious about that call on Sunday. See you later. Bye.”

 

Penny was present at the evening service. She even got into the church house before the pastor and his family. Robert noticed that she was not carrying her clarinet case this time. He caught her eye immediately, as he was sitting on the right side of the aisle as he had agreed to do. She gave him her wide smile and quickly sat beside him. Her expression did not give any evidence of problems in her life so Robert assumed that she had not heard any more about her family’s attempt to call her a few days earlier.

 

“I decided to sit with you and sing tonight,” she told Robert. “After all, I haven’t heard you sing at all because I always go up front and play the clarinet during the singing. Tonight, I’ll find out how good a bass voice you have.”

 

Slightly embarrassed at the thought of his singing being judged, he replied, “Maybe I’ll get to hear you, too.” No more was said until after the service.

 

Since Penny seemed as jolly as usual, Robert relaxed and entered into the service with his mind and his heart, putting forth his usual effort to truly worship. That was his practice for every service. That’s why he attended the services, to worship.

 

When the benediction signaled the close of the service, it was easier than usual for the couple to begin talking as they were already sitting together. They simply remained in their pew and talked.

 

After the polite things were all said, Robert decided to redeem the time since all too soon the pastor would call to Penny, saying it was time to head for Adrian.

 

“Well, I’ve been wondering all week if you’d heard any more about your sister,” he began.

 

“I expected you to ask something like that,” Penny remarked. “I talked to Ramona, my friend at college. She took the original call on Sunday. She says that my dad was trying to reach me about Julie having some medical emergency or such. I’ve had some trouble with him, what little contact I’ve had with him so I have genuine doubts about his message about Julie.”

 

With concern showing, Robert asked, “Did you call him, or Julie? That seems to be the best way to get to the bottom of all this.”

 

“No, I didn’t!” she replied with some display of having been offended by his query.

 

“I’m sorry if I got out of place, Penny,” Robert offered. “It’s just that it makes sense to me to try to find out what’s going on. That’s all. I’m sorry if I was too nosy.”

 

Her big smile returned as she said, “I forgive you. I can take care of this situation. It is my family, and I know how to deal with them. OK?”

 

“Let’s change the subject,” suggested Robert.

 

“Yes, Let’s do that,” Penny returned.

 

“Mom called from her work just before I left home to come here tonight,” he told her. “You’ve been invited to our home for Thanksgiving, that is if you want to come.”

 

“Do I!” she exclaimed. “I wouldn’t miss Lila’s great cooking for anything. And, maybe I can cut the noodles correctly this time. Plan on me. I’ll be there.”

 

“I was really hoping you’d give that kind of answer,” he confided. “Everyone enjoyed your visit Sunday, even Grandma.”

 

“Yes, she’s precious. I can tell that she was really a great Christian lady before her mind went bad,” Penny said. “I’m not always sure that Ben liked me, but being a teenager, he probably doesn’t know for sure what he likes.”

 

“Just between us, Penny,” Robert confided, “I’m very concerned, even afraid for Ben. For now, just know that I would be glad to have you remember him when you pray at home. I know he needs God’s help. Actually, Mom does, too. I think she’s making some big mistakes in decisions she makes about Ben. I wish she was home at night to see him.”

 

“I think I understand, to a degree,” Penny replied. “I am from a broken home. My parents divorced when I was in my teen years. It’s hard enough to open up to parents when everything is going well in the family. But, when the mother works and the father works, and with the extra burden of your grandmother there, no doubt Ben feels there’s no one to care about his problems.”

 

“I guess so,” agreed Robert. “I doubt that I’m doing enough for him, either. I guess Kerry and I are closer than Ben and I. Maybe I can do something about it. I don’t know for sure, though, what it is.”

 

As the pastor called for his wife and Penny to get ready to leave for Adrian, Penny advised, “Give it some attention as you pray. God has an answer. Remember the verse in Philippians 4:13. It says, ‘I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.’ That’s your assignment for the rest of the week; just practice that verse, OK?”

 

“Will do!” was his answer.

 

 

 

Two days later, Saturday morning, Lila answered the ringing phone in her kitchen. Yelling up the stairs, she called for Ben, whose room was at the top of the stairs, to knock on Robert’s door and tell him there was a phone call for him.

 

“He’ll be right here, Penny,” Lila spoke into the phone. “By the way, he told me that you said you’d be here for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Oh, here’s Robert.”

 

Looking somewhat disheveled from having been awakened from sleep on the only day he could plan on sleeping late, he reached for the receiver and said, “Hello, this is Robert.”

 

Lila, watching from a few feet away, could soon tell that it was a serious call, not just chit-chat, which Penny and Robert had not been doing anyhow. She waited for the conversation to end to ask, “Is it about the call last Sunday, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom,” re replied. “She wondered if I could drive to Adrian so we can talk. I guess she got another call and wants someone to share it with.”

 

“So, you’ll be driving to Adrian right away?”

 

“Yes, as soon as I get the cow milked,” he answered.

 

Lila suggested, “Let me do it for you this morning, or I may get Ben or Kerry to do it. That way, you can get around and be on your way.”

 

“Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate it,” was Robert’s only response.

 

In less than an hour he was at Mrs. Draper’s door, where Penny stayed while in college. This time, Penny did not keep him waiting as she had done earlier. She answered the knock on the door herself. Robert could see a difference in her, besides the evidence that she had been crying. Her demeanor was different. The jolly look was not on her pretty face, having been replaced by what seemed to be bewilderment.

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to drive so far on your day off, Robert,” she began. “It’s just that I feel you are quite a spiritual young man, and right now I need to talk to someone who is spiritually alive.”

 

“It’s OK,” he consoled. “Is it about your sister?”

 

“Yes, it’s a long story, and I really should tell you some of the details. I called my youngest sister, Janet. She’s a good Christian. She gave me some advice, but she is in the family and doesn’t see everything the same as I do.”

 

“What kind of things?” he asked. “I mean, don’t tell me what you don’t think is my business, but I’ll be glad to pray and help however I can.”

 

Glancing at Mrs. Draper, who was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room, Penny suggested with a smile, “I think we should go somewhere and spend some time talking. I don’t know where, maybe to one of the parks here in town. Is that all right?”

 

“Of course,” was Robert’s response.

 

“I’ll be back after a while, Mrs. Draper,” Penny excused herself and Robert.

 

“All right, Dear,” smiled the older lady. “If I’m out, just let yourself in.”

 

As they were getting into Robert’s car and driving off, Penny explained, “Mrs. Draper is a great family friend and all, but I really don’t feel like exposing all my problems to her. I guess she’s a Christian, but not my confidante.”

 

“I think I understand what you mean by that,” was Robert’s response. “Now, tell me how to get to the park.”

 

As they drove, Penny began unloading some of her family’s secrets, at least those which related to her relationship with her sister, Julie.

 

“I hope you’re not embarrassed by what I may tell you today, Rob,” she began.

 

Robert stopped her with, “Robert. I’m Robert, not Rob nor Bob. I’m named after my Grandpa Robert Sullivan, and I never let anyone nickname me.” Placing a hand on her wrist, he went on, “Don’t be offended. I just wanted to let you know what to call me. Now, what were you saying about me being embarrassed? Sounds like you’re about to tell me something pretty far out.”

 

“I guess it is, at least from Julie’s point of view,” said Penny. “She hasn’t spoken to me for about a year and a half. My dad neither. He and Julie are really close, and together, they have really caused me a lot of pain, inside pain,” she explained, putting her hand over her heart.

 

“I’m very sorry to hear that,” he answered.

 

Getting somewhat misty-eyed, Penny went on, “I love my sister; I really do and always have loved her. Still, she has caused me tremendous emotional anguish. Honestly, I’m confused, very confused. How could someone whom I love so much be so hateful to me as to not even speak to me, or even look my way, when we saw each other? She was at my youngest sister’s house many months ago, when Janet’s youngest son was born. We were having a baby shower, and it should have been a really happy occasion.” Penny was on the verge of crying.

 

Not knowing for sure what to do, Robert placed his hand on Penny’s wrist and patted it. To him, it was a gesture of comfort. Obviously, she understood his intention and gave him a big, teary smile. She paused to get control of her emotions, pointing out landmarks and interesting houses as they drove toward a park.

 

“Turn right here,” Penny said, but she pointed to the left. As Robert began turning toward the right, she again spoke, “No, I said to go left. Now we missed the road and will need to turn around.”

 

“I’m sorry,” answered Robert. “I thought you said to turn right.”

 

“But I pointed to the left, Robert,” she scolded. Then, she quieted herself and replied, “It’s partly my fault, I guess, if I said right and pointed left. Sorry.”

 

Trying to dismiss the little incident, Robert managed a weak smile, saying, “It’s OK. I’m sure you’re worked up, and I could have mistaken what you said.”

 

“I forgive you,” answered Penny. “Let’s just turn around up there at that gas station and come back. Then, turn right, R, I, G, H, T, and into the drive which leads to the park.”

 

When they got the car parked in a shaded spot near a vacant picnic table, Robert got out and opened the door for her, leading her to a clean spot at the table.

 

“Now, whenever you’re ready to tell me your story, I’ll be here to listen. Take your time. Mom took care of my morning chores so I have many hours for you if you need that much time.”

 

Flashing her great smile, which added so much to her beauty, she reached for Robert’s hand and squeezed it between both of her hands. Robert’s heart welled up with unexpressed emotion. What a good sign!

 

She began again, “I told you that some of my story could be embarrassing. It’s this.” She took a deep breath and continued, “Julie and I were not only sisters but best friends until over a year ago. We shared secrets and had so many of the same interests. Even after she got married, we stayed close. But about a year and a half ago, she heard something about me, and believed it, and has never spoken to me since.”

 

Robert was a good listener, nodding, smiling when it seemed appropriate, gently squeezing the hands which were still holding his.

 

Encouraged by his patient listening skills, she went on, “I not only had bad things being said about me, but I lost one of the closest people on earth. I thought she would at least ask me about the things she heard about me. She should try to find out the truth before discarding me as her sister and close friend. It hurts me so very much.”

 

“Do you feel like telling me what the lies were about,” asked the young man. “I mean, if you don’t want to, it’s all right. I’m not trying to pry into your personal life.”

 

Waving him to silence with a slight smile, she said, “I plan to tell you, but it may influence your thoughts about me.” She watched his face, studying for evidence of his thoughts. Seeing nothing except what appeared to be genuine concern, Penny resumed.

 

“This is hard to talk about. Someone, I think it was my dad, told Julie that I had been doing something really bad. I guess she believed it without trying to find out if it is true.” She glanced at Robert again.

 

She went on,” The story seems to be related to sexual misconduct. The way it was retold to me is that I flirted with someone when I was around twelve years old and then that I allowed him to do some wrong stuff with me. In fact, I have been accused of doing this several times and with more than one person.”

 

“And it’s just someone’s lie against you.” Robert finished the thought.

 

Penny did not respond, maintaining silence as she looked at the ground. Robert could not tell whether she was embarrassed or lost in thought or if she did not intend to answer his question. He was somewhat uncomfortable with her silence at this time.

 

Finally looking up at him, Penny said, “The painful part is losing my sister. Her hatred toward me is clear as anything. At Janet’s baby shower last year, the whole family was there except my dad. We were all having a fun time, except whenever Julie saw me glance toward her. She got an awful icy look on her face and turned her head away every time. I tried to speak to her, but she pretended she could not hear me, like I no longer existed.”

 

She turned away from Robert slightly and sobbed quietly. This was a difficult problem for him, making him at a loss as to what he should do. Cautiously, he put his arm over her shoulders. He felt this would enable her to lean on him for comfort if she chose to. She did.

 

“I still love Julie, deeply. I really do and don’t want to stop loving her,” Penny sobbed, less in control now.

 

Robert allowed her to cry, but he was not accustomed to being a comforter. He felt that, although this was not a pleasant experience for either of them, this time of heartbreak would strengthen the bond which seemed to be building between him and Penny.

 

When she regained control, she decided to share more. “The call last Sunday was about Julie, as you know. It’s not that she necessarily feels any different toward me, but she has a problem. She and my dad tried everything they could before feeling the need to contact me. My sister, Janet, called early today. She’s married to a Christian man. They have two children. She’s close to me and also close to my dad. Janet says that Julie is very seriously sick. She has leukemia.”

 

“Wow! That sounds pretty serious,” interjected Robert.

 

“Yes, it is,” Penny replied. “She needs a bone marrow transplant. The donor should be someone in the family if any of us have the same blood type she has. None of them do, but I do. She needs me to donate marrow so she can live.”

 

“Is it dangerous for you?” asked Robert.

 

“Not really,” was her answer. “I would have to have a physical exam. If I’m healthy enough, they would give me a spinal tap to make it painless. It takes an hour or so, and I would be free to go home in a few hours. I could have a little discomfort for a couple of days, nothing more.”

 

Pausing to process the information he’d just received, Robert watched Penny’s countenance undergo a change. She had been sobbing; then she became reflectful; and now she was regaining a hint of her warm smile.

 

“I’ve prayed about it all morning, Rob - - , I mean, Robert,” she announced. “And, I think I should take a couple of days off next week and go to Lansing for the tissue tests. I want to call Janet this afternoon to tell her that Julie can begin her chemotherapy. Her immune system will be destroyed by that. Then, she will die if I do not go through with the marrow donation.”

 

“So, you’ve decided for sure. Right?”

 

“Yes, I think it is what the Lord would be pleased to have me do. The book of Micah says that a person’s enemies are sometimes those of his own family. That’s how I saw Julie, as my enemy, but not because I wanted her to be an enemy. Somehow, she decided that I was bad, and she discarded me. I haven’t even seen my nephew, her son, who is over a year old now. She did not want to make any contact with me. But now, it looks as though God is using this bad sickness to change her attitude toward me.”

 

“Even if a person’s enemies may be those of his own family, the Bible also says that only One has love that is closer than the love of a brother, and that is the Lord Jesus,” remarked the young man. “To me, this says that a brother’s love, or a sister’s love in this case, is very strong. God has a plan for every life. Probably, He is using Julie’s sickness to bring you two together again.”

 

“I think I agree,” was Penny’s answer. “Now, I feel ready to go back to Mrs. Draper’s and call Janet, if that’s all right with you. I really do appreciate your help and encouragement today, Robert.”

 

“Let’s get something to eat first, OK?” he suggested.

 

She nodded, “Super idea, Mr. Lewis!” Her big smile had returned.

 

After their meal, Robert returned her to Mrs. Draper’s home, and then he went back to St. Leon. Although concerned, he had a rather good feeling about Penny’s decision to donate marrow for her estranged sister. For sure, this was pleasing to God.

 

The next day, the Lord’s Day, or for the Quakers, First Day, was a good day for Robert. Lila suggested he invite Penny for lunch although no previous plans had been made for her to be their guest. Penny excitedly accepted Lila’s invitation.

 

She spent the whole afternoon at the Lewis home so that she and Robert went together to Lester Chapel for the evening service.

 

They quietly prayed together after the service, before she returned to Adrian with the pastor’s family. The subject of their prayer, of course, was the testing she would undergo in Lansing the next day. They also prayed about any family meetings, especially if Penny would be seeing Julie at all.

 

Robert felt the anxiety the next few days. He could hardly wait until Thursday night to see if Penny had returned from Lansing and would be at the prayer service. She was there, but, of course, the pastor was running late so any news had to wait until after the service.

 

Quickly after the last ‘Amen’, Penny turned to Robert to try to tell him about the trip to Lansing. “I had the tissue tests, and everything is set. My tissues and Julie’s are a good match, thank the Lord. I’ll go back the week of Thanksgiving, on Monday, for the real thing.”

 

“That’s great, I guess,” began Robert. “But, does that mean you won’t be at our house for Thanksgiving?”

 

“Oh, no!” she reassured him with her big smile. “I plan to come back on Wednesday. Janet and her husband will bring me to your Aunt Beulah’s that afternoon. You can pick me up on Thursday morning. Now, you can quit worrying about that.”

 

Relieved, he asked, “Did you get to see Julie?”

 

A shadow darkened her smile. “Yes, I went to the hospital. I wanted to tell her that I love her and am going to give her part of my own body as evidence.”

 

“That news should have pleased her,” he figured.

 

“She wouldn’t even talk to me,” confided Penny. “She turned her head toward the wall when she saw me come into the room, and she never would look toward me.” Penny’s lip quivered a bit as she told him this news.

 

“I’m very sorry, Penny,” Robert responded. “It’s hard to believe she could treat you this way, especially when you are offering her life.”

 

“I’ll still donate the marrow, though,” she said. “I still love her, and I told her so. She still insists on being hateful to me, though, and it hurts me a lot.”

 

When the pastor announced his readiness to head back to Adrian, Robert told Penny, “God can change her feelings about you. I expect her to realize what you’re doing for her, something that no one forced you to do. I’ll be much in prayer about all this.”

 

Chapter 7: Impact of a Loss

 

 

The day before Thanksgiving was always an exciting time at Lila Lewis’ home. She worked diligently to prepare a perfect Thanksgiving meal for her husband and three sons. It was one of the major annual traditions and usually varied little from year to year. There was always a gigantic tom turkey in the oven overnight. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, gravy, noodles, pumpkin pie, dressing, a big relish plate, and some type of cranberry salad were always on the table or on the counter when the table was too full to hold any more.

 

Lila knew that she would end up throwing away the cranberry salad in a couple of days. The boys never wanted any of it, but she always prepared it because it was a part of Thanksgiving’s tradition.

 

Everyone in the family knew of Penny’s trip to Lansing. Even Chauncey asked a lot of questions of Lila about the procedure which Penny had to go through to help her sister. Kerry and Ben said nothing, but Robert knew that they were very much aware of the noble deed which his special friend had done for Julie.

 

Lila was using Wednesday morning to get the noodles cut and the pies made. She had to go to her job at the corrugated box factory by three o’clock Wednesday afternoon so she was trying to get as much done as possible before leaving for work.

 

Ben had been watching her for a half hour. Not much for cooking, himself, he enjoyed watching Lila or his oldest brother whenever they cooked. Robert did most of the cooking at night when Lila was at work.

 

“Mom,” he finally managed to begin talking of what was on his mind. “I’ve been wondering something.”

 

“What’s that, Dear?” she asked.

 

“My friend has a problem, and I wondered if we could help him with it.” Ben did not often ask favors. Usually, he remained quiet and tried to work out his own problems.

 

Realizing that this was an opportunity to have more communication with her quietest son, Lila was open to whatever he had on his mind.

 

“Which friend are you meaning, Ben?” she asked, opening the way for him to talk more.

 

Pausing briefly, Ben squirmed a bit, then answered, “It’s Martin, Martin Jackson. He’s a senior this year, and he wants to graduate from Chester High.”

 

“Well, why can’t he? What’s the problem?”

 

“His dad is moving to Wisconsin right after Christmas for a different job. If Marty can’t find somewhere to stay, somewhere in this township, he will have to move with his dad and not graduate here.” Ben did not appear comfortable with all the questions, and he realized that his mother would need to do more probing before he could even hope for her to grant the request he was about to make.

 

As expected, Lila had some pointed questions. “How do you happen to be so close to a senior, Ben? You’re only fourteen years old. This Marty must be seventeen or eighteen in order to be a senior this year.”

 

Not looking up into his mother’s eyes, Ben tried to make it appear innocent. “He’s usually down at the store front where we practice at night. See, he’s a good bass player, and he practices with us. We don’t run around together or anything, just work on our music. He’s a good guy, Mom. You’d like him.”

 

Trying to not chase her youngest son off with too many questions, Lila tried to change the direction of the conversation to a degree. “What did you think I could do about his problem with finishing school here? I’m not quite understanding what you’re trying to ask me.”

 

“Never mind, Mom,” Ben tried to dismiss the questions, hoping that he may be able to bring it up again later. “We can talk another time. You’re really busy now, OK?”

 

Pausing with a smile, she washed her hands and sat down at the table with Ben. “No, Ben. I have time now. I’m not too busy to spend time with you. Now, tell me what you had in mind, Son.”

 

The heat was on for Ben. It was time for him to open up to his mother.

 

“I know we’re kind of crowded here now since Grandma moved in. But, to help Marty, I would let him share my room if we could find another bed,” he began.

 

Lila’s eyes widened. “Well, I didn’t expect this kind of request, Ben. We really are crowded right now. Besides, I’m awfully busy with working and taking care of Grandma’s needs and all the work I have just for our immediate family. I don’t know about taking in one more person.”

 

“Just forget it!” Ben was quickly defensive. “I don’t have any rights here anyway. Maybe I’ll just find somewhere else to live. I can’t have my friends here or anything.” His anger was irrational. He got up to walk out the back door.

 

Rising to stop him, Lila called, “Ben, don’t go out. I want to discuss this. I didn’t say that we can’t help. Just give me a chance to work on it.”

 

When Ben stopped and turned around, she continued, “You can have your friends over. Sometimes you do have company. That’s all right. But taking someone in is something else.”

 

“Mom, bring it up some other time, when I’m not angry,” suggested Ben. “For now, I’m going to the store front to practice.” He walked out.

 

Within a few short minutes, Lila’s spirits had changed from joyful anticipation of one of the biggest family celebrations of the year to a dark feeling of slowly losing one of her dear sons.

 

Kerry walked in at just that moment and noticed the despair written on his mother’s face. “Mom, what’s wrong? I saw Ben outside, and he looked upset. Now, I can see that you’re worked up, too.”

 

“We just had a misunderstanding, Kerry,” Lila said. “It will clear up. It’s going to be OK.”

 

“I’m not too sure, Mom,” he answered. “He’s been changing a lot lately, for a few weeks. Robert said something to me about it, too. He needs some kind of help.”

 

“Maybe after the holiday,” she sighed. “We can work on it then. For now, we must plan on a good day tomorrow. We have Penny coming for Thanksgiving, and it will be a good day. I’m sure. Your dad and I will deal with Ben later.”

 

 

 

Thanksgiving Day dawned with a lot of excitement in the Lewis home. Lila was excited about the entertaining and the cooking involved for her as she wanted to again provide a perfect meal for her beloved sons and her mother. And, the realization that Penny would be present added to her determination to have a perfect day.

 

Robert was up early, anticipating his trip to Bill and Beulah’s to get Penny. He figured he would need to wait for her to finish getting ready. He was correct as she had got up only a half hour earlier and was in no great hurry to get around. So, Robert waited about forty-five minutes before opening the passenger side door of his car for her.

 

Entering the Lewis home, Penny’s big, warm smile met Grandma Sullivan first and then Ben, who was sitting with a scowl on his young face. Her smile seemed to have a good influence as Grandma began babbling, and Ben started to grin.

 

Hearing the commotion from the kitchen, Lila came into the living room and gave Penny a hug. “Welcome back. I’ve been waiting for your help, if you feel like having a part in preparing the meal.”

 

“Of course, I do,” Penny squealed. “I won’t cut the noodles one at a time this time.”

 

“The noodles are already cut,” said Lila. “But I haven’t yet whipped the cream to put on the dessert. Care to do that?”

 

Nodding with delight, Penny responded, “Yes, just show me what to do. That’s something I’ve never done.”

 

Standing directly behind her, Ben couldn’t resist rolling his eyes in disbelief. This time, however, he did not mouth any disrespectful comments as he had done earlier. It was clear, however, that he found it incredible that a twenty-one year old woman didn’t know how to cook at all.

 

Lila gave Penny brief instructions and went back to carving the big turkey. Chauncey was watching from the doorway between the kitchen and living room. It was always an irritation to him when Thanksgiving dinner was not ready precisely at noon. Lila was very much aware of Chauncey’s irritation so she worked as efficiently as possible to get the meal on the table.

 

Just about the time Lila had the table as perfect as she could, Penny began asking, “What did I do wrong? The whipped cream was getting really pretty, but now it’s getting lumps in it. Did I do something wrong?”

 

Lila burst out laughing as she inspected Penny’s project, saying, “You’ve whipped it too long. It was ready earlier, but when you kept whipping it, it became butter.”

 

Laughing at herself, Penny said, “I’m sorry. Like I said, I’ve never done this before. Now, I’ve ruined the whipped cream. It’s not funny, but it really is funny, too. Now there’s no whipped cream for the pie.”

 

“No, that’s not true,” Robert chimed in. “I squeeze a lot of cream from the cow every day. I’m sure we can skim enough off the milk in the fridge to try again. Right, Mom?”

 

Delighted with Penny’s latest kitchen problem, Lila laughed, “Of course. I’ll skim off some more cream and let you start over again. Don’t be upset, Penny. This happens a lot to new cooks.”

 

 

 

As expected, the eating of the meal did not begin until after Lila asked Penny to pray a Thanksgiving prayer. In the past years that had not been a part of their custom at the holiday, but this year was different, and no one seemed to mind, not even the impatient Chauncey. After Penny’s prayer, Chauncey glanced at his sons with a big, toothless grin and winked. Clearly, he thought highly of this young lady.

 

Talk around the table was general, nothing specific about Penny’s trip to donate marrow for her sister. During a lull in the conversation, Grandma began one of her times of nonsense talk. As everyone realized that she did not know what she was saying, no one felt the need of any type of explanations or apologies. They just let her talk.

 

“Today, today, today, today,” said Grandma Sullivan, over and over. Nothing more than the one word, today.

 

Robert mentioned to his mother, “Mom, I heard her early this morning, and that was all she said. I wonder why.”

 

“It’s hard to say, Son,” Lila answered. “She probably doesn’t even know what she’s saying. It’s OK, just let her say it.”

 

The meal ended. Lila said, “I’m leaving everything on the table. Everyone can just come in and pick up whatever they want for the rest of the day. But for now, let’s go into the living room and be more comfortable.”

 

Lila would not have been surprised if some of the boys had excused themselves to go outside or to their rooms, but none did. Even Chauncey stayed inside, waiting to hear anything he could about Penny’s medical ordeal of a few days earlier.

 

“How are you feeling, Penny?” Lila finally asked, hoping the question would open the way for Penny to talk about the donation.

 

“Oh, I’m great!” was Penny’s answer. “I’m a little sore from the puncture, but it’s not really too painful. I’m glad I could help my sister.”

 

Now, everyone felt they could ask questions. “Is she friendlier to you now?” To the surprise of everyone, the question had come from Ben.

 

Briefly overtaken by an expression of sadness, Penny lowered her eyes and answered, “No, not really, Ben. She would not talk to me before the procedure, saying she was too sleepy from the anesthetic and too sick from the chemotherapy. So, I accepted it for the time. But, after it was over, I waited around until the next day, hoping to get to talk to her. She wouldn’t talk.”

 

“I’m so sorry, Dear,” consoled Lila. Grandma, too, seemed aware of Penny’s sadness. She watched her and rocked in the rocker and wiped her eyes briefly.

 

“Sorry. Today, today, today,” repeated Grandma as she rocked.

 

Penny decided to continue. “I went to Julie’s room on Tuesday, two days ago, just before Janet drove me back to Adrian. I told her I was praying for her and that I was glad I got to be the one to donate marrow for her.” At that, Penny could no longer hold back the sobbing.

 

Chauncey got a very uncomfortable expression on his face and looked at the floor. Ben began shuffling his feet and put his hands into his pockets and then pulled them out again, clearly ill-at-ease. Kerry quietly walked out of the room and went to the bathroom, saying nothing.

 

“Today, today, today.” It was Sarah Sullivan’s chanting.

 

Finally, Penny composed herself and manufactured a small grin. “This is Thanksgiving, not a funeral.” she announced. “God is helping me. He knows, and I know, and I think my sister knows that I love her deeply. My gift to her was not conditional. I did not ask her to repay me by being pleasant to me. I think she will think about it for a long time, and she will some day be grateful and thankful.”

 

“I hope so,” finally Robert spoke. “She needed what you were able to give her. That should mean something to her.”

 

Her smile returning, Penny suggested, “Robert, why don’t you play the piano for a few songs. This is a holiday so we need music.”

 

Kerry and Ben usually did not hang around when Lila or Robert played the piano, and this time was no exception. Ben said, “Mom, I’m going to the store front. I think Marty and some of the others are going to be there this afternoon to practice. OK?”

 

“All right, Son,” Lila answered. “Bring them in for some leftovers after a while if you want. There’s plenty.”

 

Kerry just quietly disappeared for a few hours, most likely going to a friend’s house for football. Chauncey slipped to the master bedroom for an afternoon nap. This left Penny, Robert, Lila and Grandma in the living room where Robert was beginning to play chords on the piano as he decided what songs to play.

 

“That’s an Easter song, Robert,” laughed Lila as she recognized that he was playing In The Garden. This is Thanksgiving.”

 

“I know, Mom, but it’s one of my favorites,” said Robert. “This song touches me deep inside sometimes.”

 

“Me, too, Robert,” said Penny. “Go on. Play it. I like it, especially the chorus. It says, ‘And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known’.”

 

Robert played the song a few times. Lila spoke to Penny while his music continued, “This reminds me of a friend of mine, many years ago, when I was a teenager.”

 

“You mean, this song?” asked Penny with a big smile.

 

Nodding, Lila told her, “Her name was Ethel, and she was going with a boy named Andrew. Whenever they sang that song in church, some of us would look at Ethel and laugh, and she knew what we were thinking.” Lila was beaming as she told the account.

 

With her face beaming with happy anticipation, Penny asked, “What were you thinking?”

 

“The chorus, we changed the spelling of a couple of words and sent Ethel a note. Instead of ‘And He walks with me and He talks with me’, we changed the words to ‘Andy walks with me; Andy talks with me’. It was so funny. We shortened the name Andrew to Andy. Ethel and Andy finally got married, and we’ve always laughed with them about how the chorus sounds.”

 

“That’s hilarious!” squealed Penny. “I can see that you liked to have fun when you were young. So do I. None of that ultra serious stuff for me. I think God wants us to laugh and enjoy life.”

 

Sarah Sullivan clearly enjoyed Penny’s good spirit and joined in with, “Today, today, today, today.”

 

Robert finished the song, played a couple more songs and then suggested, “Let’s go out for a walk, OK, Penny?”

 

Getting up with her contagious smile, she replied, “Sure thing. Let me find my jacket.” She went to the guest closet and pulled out a rather well-worn red jacket and slipped it on as Robert opened the door for her.

 

It was a nippy day for a walk, but the temperature was still above freezing. They decided they could endure the chill and walked about two miles and then walked back to the Lewis homestead. Their walk was slow in order for them to have more time to talk.

 

When they got back into the house, Lila and Grandma were just finishing with the dishes. Grandma was all smiles as she loved to dry dishes. Also, she always lit up when she saw Penny.

 

“How was the walk?” asked Lila in an effort to have conversations open up. It was clear that she thought highly of Penny. No doubt, she hoped the relationship would develop into an eventual marriage proposal.

 

Lila’s question went unanswered for some time. Robert said nothing, his countenance being less than joyful. At last, Penny decided to converse.

 

“It’s kind of cool, but it was nice to get away from the noises of the city and to hear a few birds and see a few wild creatures. We even saw a pair of deer a long way back from the road.” Her face with filled with the trademark smile which they all loved so much.

 

Knowing her son rather well, Lila decided to not ask any more of Robert, allowing him to talk whenever he was ready. Still, she began to worry about his quietness on this holiday, and especially with the presence of the girl he seemed to care quite a lot for.

 

They snacked and played a few rounds of Scrabble until around six o’clock when Robert announced he needed to change his clothes and go get the cow milked.

 

“Oh, let me come and help you,” squealed Penny. “I’ve never tried to milk a cow.”

 

Robert worked on a weak smile and said, “Sure, we’ll make a farm girl out of you yet.” With that, he went and changed and led Penny to the stable.

 

Penny was laughing and talking a lot when they got back inside. Robert showed her how he strains the milk and puts two gallons into the pasteurizer each evening. He seemed more at ease now, but Lila felt there was still some sort of problem he was stewing about.

 

After eating some warmed over food, Penny asked Robert to return her to Beulah’s where she would stay for the weekend, until Sunday night.

 

Robert was back home rather quickly after taking Penny to his uncle’s, more quickly than Lila had expected. Since Kerry and Ben were still gone, and Chauncey had driven over to see his mother for a while, only Grandma Sullivan and Lila were at home. Robert decided to talk.

 

“Mom, there’s a problem,” he began.

 

“Yes, I could tell that something was wrong after your afternoon walk with Penny, Son. What is it?” she asked.

 

“Well, she’s going away,” he answered with the expression of a whipped puppy on his face. He was not too talented at hiding his feelings, especially from Lila.

 

“Who? Penny?” she asked. “Where?”

 

“Yes, Penny,” he responded with some disgust being evident. “Her friend at college, that Ramona who called here that one Sunday afternoon, she’s talked Penny into going into what she calls ‘home missionary work’, in Texas of all places.”

 

“Texas? That’s hard to believe. I mean, she’s only got a year of college left, doesn’t she? Why not finish first, before going into something so far away?”

 

Lila had strong ideas concerning being practical. It was a product of having to raise three sons on a limited income and of living on a farm. Careful planning was an intimate part of her nature.

 

“She says God told her to go,” explained the young man. “Her friend at college, Ramona Santana, is from near El Paso, Texas. She told Penny that she could do home missionary work among the Mexican people there and at the same time get some training as a nurse at a hospital there.”

 

Silence filled the room for a couple of minutes, finally broken by Sarah Sullivan, “Today, today, today.” Robert and Lila looked at each other upon hearing Grandma’s words.

 

Although it was still rather early, too early to go to bed on this holiday evening, Robert excused himself to go to his room. For him, solitude was often a necessity, to enable him to sort out his thoughts, and to pray. This night would be spent in his room although he often took long walks around the farm, even late at night, to meditate and pray.

 

 

 

Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, usually was a big shopping day for Lila. She always planned a big Christmas for her family. It was one of the reasons she worked at the factory, to provide good things for her boys. Today, however, she was distressed about Robert’s quietness, and also about Ben’s request to help Martin Jackson by finding a place for him to stay until graduation. She’d still not confronted Chauncey about that situation. Too, this year she had Grandma living with them so Lila decided to try to stay around home on this big shopping day.

 

Robert came in from milking the cow. “Good morning, Son,” Lila welcomed. “Any plans for the day?”

 

Before he could answer, the phone rang.

 

Lila answered it and handed the receiver to Robert, “For you, Robert. I think it’s Penny.”

 

He was a little brighter in spirits after ending the phone conversation. “It was her. I’m going to Bill and Beulah’s, and we’re going to town for a while.”

 

With a smile, Lila said, “Have fun. Tell her ‘hi’ for me.”

 

Mostly, Robert and Penny just rode around, stopping occasionally when a particular store or strip mall seemed of special interest to one of them. The shopping trip served as a chance for them to talk with some leisure as they enjoyed each other’s presence. Neither Robert nor Penny wanted to open up problem areas to discuss although both were eager to have the discussion of problems out of the way.

 

“I’ll be around yet for Christmas, and even New Year’s,” said Penny. “So, that means I want some ideas for Christmas gifts I can get for your family. Know what I mean?”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean,” Robert replied. “It means you are determined to go to Texas. I can’t change your mind in any way, can I?”

 

“Don’t say it that way. It sounds so pessimistic,” she answered. “Besides, I prayed and feel it’s an open door for service, and I should go.”

 

“Won’t that door always be open? I mean, it’s in the United States, not overseas where you need visas and such. You can always go to Texas, even in a year, after you finish your degree,” he countered.

 

“That’s not definite, the open door part,” she explained. “Ramona’s older sister is in the admissions department of the nursing school at Columbia Medical Center. She can assure my acceptance for the spring term and can help me find some financial assistance. I can get an LPN degree in two years or an RN in about three and a half years. That door may not remain open, such as, if she is no longer working there to help me get in.”

 

“But why clear out there?” queried Robert. “There are hospitals here in Michigan with nursing schools.”

 

“This is a special one, with three locations in El Paso and is in the foothills of the Franklin Mountains. Ramona has told me all about it,” sighed Penny.

 

“How do you know that God wants you there?” was Robert’s response.

 

“I just know it. Everything is falling into place, and my heart wants to go. I can be a missionary to the Mexican people there and still be getting my nursing degree.”

 

“But you have just one more year and you’ll be finished with your teaching degree here. Why not finish it first?”

 

With some frustration showing, she answered, “God’s ways are not as our ways. That’s in the Scriptures. His ways do not always sound sensible to humans, but years later, we sometimes see what He had in His plan that we could not see earlier. This is, definitely is, God’s will.”

 

Such talk continued throughout the afternoon hours. The young man realized that there was no need to try to persuade her to change her plans.

 

 

 

Robert spent as much time with Penny as he could, any week days that she had time, he drove to Adrian to be with her. She spent every weekend at Bill and Beulah’s so they could be together. It seemed to Robert that she wanted to be with him as much as he wanted to be with her. Still, she did not budge concerning her decision to go to Texas. He hoped that their time together would change her mind, that she would consider the possibility of building a future with him rather than going several hundred miles away from him.

 

Robert bought her a fancy, leather-bound Bible commentary for Christmas. He knew she would enjoy its use in her private devotions, and maybe, for her school work. He found a side-by-side Spanish/English Bible and had a sales clerk hold a copy of it for him in case he decided to buy it at the last minute for Penny. He knew that she had no knowledge of Spanish and felt it could be helpful if she did, indeed, move to work among Spanish speaking people.

 

As always, Lila had big Christmas plans. Her living room was extra large, but by the time she got the Christmas tree up and the tremendous number of gifts under it, the room seemed too small. The evergreen bushes outside the front of the house were decorated with electric lights long before Christmas. Electric candles were in every window which faced the road. Lila had stored several canisters of homemade candy and some of Chauncey’s favorite store-bought chocolates and caramel squares. The only grocery store in St. Leon was holding three cases of assorted flavors of soda pop for her until Christmas Eve. She knew that she could not try to store it at the farm. The boys would find it and begin celebrating with it before Christmas. Lila was ready for Christmas, her absolute favorite holiday, although she really seemed to enjoy every holiday.

 

With the boys and Chauncey being so impatient about holiday celebrations, Lila had decided several years earlier that the best time for their Christmas celebrating was on Christmas Eve rather than waiting until the next morning. Besides, if Robert’s girl friend was being included this year, and Lila was determined to include her, it would be more convenient to celebrate the evening before Christmas. She discussed this with Penny a couple of weeks before Christmas. Penny said that her family usually did not get together for the holiday; they just phoned or sent cards or both. Christmas Eve fit into Penny’s schedule quite well.

 

In the middle of the afternoon on the day before Christmas, Robert drove to Adrian, to Mrs. Draper’s house, to pick up Penny. She would enjoy the evening with the Lewis family and then spend the night at Bill and Beulah’s house. Robert was nervous about the trip. He planned on asking a question which he feared asking.

 

“Penny,” he began when she was seated in his car and they were already on the outskirts of Adrian, headed toward St. Leon. “Um, can we talk? I mean, I want to say something to you. I kind of don’t know how to start.”

 

Seeing his awkwardness, trying to put him at ease, she gave him her open, friendly smile. “What is it, big boy? You aren’t afraid to talk to me, are you? Let me help you get started; is it good or bad?” She laughed to put him at ease. She was so good at being friendly and approachable.

 

“Well, I’ve known you for almost four months now,” he began. “And, I think, really, I know, that we enjoy being together. Right?”

 

She nodded and continued her warm, smile-filled encouragement.

 

Swallowing with discomfort, he continued, “I’d like to offer you a better alternative to moving to Texas.”

 

“And what could that be?” she asked, still carrying the open smile on her slightly freckled face.

 

“I’m scared to say it,” he confessed. “Give me a minute to, just wait a little. I’ll say it yet.”

 

 

 

She seemed to have no notion of the message he was trying to give her. “Don’t be afraid of me, Robert. Just say it,” she laughed.

 

“The alternative is to help me plan a wedding,” he finally managed to say. “Penny, I would like for you to consider marrying me. Later, we could think about going somewhere in Christian work or whatever God wants of us. What do you say?”

 

“Wow! What a surprise!” she blurted. “I’ve not been having such serious thoughts about our future, Robert. I enjoy being with you, yes, but I’m really not ready for such a commitment.” She paused, watching the clouds cover his young face, then added, “I’m not saying ‘never’, just not right now. I’m sorry if I’m hurting you.”

 

Embarrassment showed. Robert tried to cover it. “I was too blunt, I think. Don’t let this ruin Christmas for us. OK? I picked a bad time to bring this up. It’s just that I really don’t want you to go to Texas in a couple of weeks. Really, I’ll miss you terribly.”

 

“I understand,” she consoled. “Maybe God will work something out; I don’t know, but for now, I must make the move. We’ll keep in touch. After all, you’re one of my closest friends.”

 

Robert determined to keep his emotions under control and enjoy the last few days that he had available to be with his copper-haired Penny.

 

He succeeded fairly well at not showing the hurt he felt during the holiday activities. The Christmas Eve celebrations were quite pleasant for him, and for Penny, and most of all, for Lila. Her face lit up every time someone opened a gift from her. It seemed she enjoyed the giving as much as they enjoyed the receiving. It was a happy evening.

 

Grandma Sullivan was as confused as ever, but she seemed to enjoy the attention and the activity surrounding her. Sometimes she referred to Penny as ‘my daughter Ruth’. At times, she returned to her, “Today, today, today” chant.

 

Robert drove Penny to Bll and Beulah’s late that evening and thanked her for the sweater she had bought for him. He realized that her finances were tight and that it involved some sacrifices on her part to afford the gift. A quick, good-night peck on the cheek reaffirmed his growing love for her.

 

“Thank you,” she said after the little kiss on the cheek. “I’ve hoped for that for some time. It means a lot to me, Robert. And, I really had a great time with your family tonight. I almost feel that I’m part of their lives. You’re all such a beautiful family, no big problems, lots of good feelings toward each other. I envy you. Good night.”

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, if you’ll let me,” said Robert. After all, that’s the real Christmas Day.”

 

“Okee doke,” she laughed. “Just don’t come around too early.”

 

Realizing Penny’s need to rest, Robert did not arrive until after one in the afternoon on Christmas Day. He wanted to avoid lunch time at Beulah’s as well as allow time for Penny to sleep late.

 

He had to work during week days between Christmas and New Year’s Day, but he spent evenings with Penny as she was at Bill and Beulah’s during the whole week. He was uptight about her impending move to Texas. She, on the other hand, spoke openly of it, anticipating the excitement of exploring a new locale.

 

 

 

New Year’s Eve found Penny at the Lewis home, enjoying the festivities with Robert and his family. She was to leave in three days so she intended to squeeze everything she could from the time remaining in Michigan.

 

“Today, today, today,” chanted Sarah Sullivan, as she had been doing often the last few weeks.

 

“No, Grandma,” said Penny with a chuckle. “It’s three more days before I go into missionary work, not today.” Then, looking toward Lila she continued, “I don’t think she understands what I’m saying so I was just having fun with her.”

 

“Yes, I realize that,” said Lila. “It’s OK. Grandma likes the interaction with you, even if she doesn’t really understand it. It’s good for her to have you talk to her.”

 

At that moment, Grandma slumped in her rocking chair and began falling forward. Lila and Robert rushed forward to catch her before she fell onto the floor.

 

“Chauncey, quick, call an ambulance!” yelled Lila as she and Robert tried to carry Grandma to the couch.

 

Grandma did not regain consciousness until after arriving at the hospital. Lila and Robert were in her hospital room when she opened her eyes. With permission, Robert went to get his father and Penny, who had ridden along with them in the family car.

 

As they watched, Grandma began to smile. “Oh, look at the beautiful flowers,” she said with a glowing smile. Then, she began to call out names as if she were recognizing some people whom only she could see. “Luella, you’re here. Oh, John, my boy John! I’m so happy to see you here.” Many names were on her lips during the next few minutes, many whom Lila recognized as having died years earlier.

 

Hardly holding back her tears, she said, “Chauncey, Robert, I think she’s seeing into Heaven. She mentioned John, my brother who died in World War Two, and Luella, her sister. I think she sees into Heaven.”

 

Chauncey was speechless but clearly awed by the experience. Robert just watched and tried to appreciate that he may possibly be in the presence of the angels who were to take his grandmother to her eternal home.

 

Grandma Sullivan looked around the room and called each one by name, correctly. Then, she said, “I saw Heaven and my friends who are there. Oh, Lila, it’s so beautiful there.” Then, her attention turned to the unseen scene she had been viewing earlier, and she resumed talking, “I knew Jesus looked like that. I’m ready! I want to stay.” She paused only a moment before lifting her elbow from the bed in a gesture that suggested someone was touching her elbow to help her make the step into a doorway. She said, “Robert, Robert, I knew you would be here to help me in.” Her arm collapsed on the bed, and she stopped breathing, a smile of contentment on her withered old face.

 

The family doctor who was standing by pronounced her dead. She died only a few minutes before midnight on New Year’s Eve with some of her beloved family present.

 

The funeral was on the second day of January. Her living children were all present. Penny was present as she was to leave for Texas on the third, the next day. There was little crying as Grandma Sullivan had joined her precious Savior and her earthly husband in Heaven.

 

Some had suggested the song Beyond The Sunset for the funeral, but Lila and Robert had already talked of plans for the music and had agreed that Grandma’s passing was not as much like a sunset as it was a sunrise. No “old people’s songs” were used in the funeral, only upbeat songs of rejoicing that one of God’s children had gone to her home.

 

“It’s what she had been living for,” said Robert. “And, it’s what I’m living for, too, even though I’m not old yet.”

 

Chapter 8: Influence of a Rebel

 

 

Robert drove Penny back to Adrian after Grandma’s funeral service was finished. He was not pleased to be the one to make this trip, but unless she called someone from her family to come for her, she had no other way to get there. They made arrangements to call each other after she got settled in El Paso. Of course, they would write, they told each other.

 

On the return trip, Robert decided that he would have to accept their friendship as a closed chapter of his life. It had been good; it had been pleasant; he had been hoping that something permanent would develop, but it did not happen. He must now go through whatever grieving period was needed and get on with his life. God had a plan for him, he was sure. The task now was to find God’s plan.

 

When he got back to the farm near St. Leon, Robert noticed that Ben and Chauncey were in the back yard. It was clear that Ben was declaring his strongest feelings about something. He was waving his arms and talking loudly to his father. Chauncey’s talk was nearly as animated as Ben’s, and the speech was punctuated with vulgarity, as usual.

 

Rather than getting involved, Robert went inside where Lila was standing at the kitchen window, watching her husband and youngest son in their attempts to communicate.

 

“What’s happening out there?” asked Robert. “Looks like they’re both kind of excited.”

 

“They are!” exclaimed Lila. “Ben’s getting out of hand anymore, I think.”

 

“What are they yelling about?”

 

“Ben wants to use the bedroom that Grandma had,” she answered.

 

“That sounds fair to me. After all, it was his room until Grandma moved in,” replied Robert. “So, what’s the problem with that?”

 

“He’s been talking about us letting Marty Jackson move in. It seems that his dad is moving away, and Marty wants to graduate from this high school,” she began. “He asked Ben if we could take him in for the rest of the school year, just until graduation, so he can finish here.”

 

“Doesn’t sound so good to me, Mom,” he offered. “This Marty guy doesn’t have a good reputation. He spends a lot of time at the store front, where Ben goes a lot.” He paused briefly, then continued. “It’s not my business, I guess, but I think he’s a bad influence on Ben.”

 

“I think something is influencing him wrongly,” Lila said. “He’s getting harder to live with. Sometimes, I just can’t reason with him at all.”

 

“Like I said, I think it’s those people at the store front, including Marty.” They watched the man and his son still arguing in the back yard for a while. “Do you think Dad will let Marty move in?”

 

“I can’t say, Son,” she responded. “Regardless of how tough your dad seems to be, he’s really soft-hearted. Maybe Ben will convince him. I really can’t outguess him.”

 

In less than a week, Marty was in the downstairs bedroom, the one which Sarah Sullivan had been using. He had offered to pay Chauncey twenty dollars a week and do his share of the chores around the farm in exchange for room and board. Ben kept the dark center bedroom upstairs as his sleeping quarters, but he spent a lot of time in the downstairs bedroom with Martin Jackson, their new boarder.

 

Soon after moving in, Marty began asking Robert for short term loans, promising to repay when his dad sent some money. Robert gave him two or three dollars at a time for lunches at school or whatever reason Marty gave for needing a little money. Within two weeks, Robert began avoiding Marty, not wanting to hear the requests for loans. Then, Marty started asking Kerry for a couple of dollars every few days, realizing that, although Kerry did not have a regular job, he always seemed to have money on him.

 

Since Lila and Chauncey both worked evenings at their respective factory jobs, they did not notice any difference in the social life of their youngest son. However, Robert was seeing problem areas becoming more serious. Ben was seldom at home, often saying he was going to the store front for the evening. However, when Robert drove past the store front, he often found it locked up with the lights off.

 

After a week of noticing this deception on Ben’s part, Robert decided to wait up until Lila got home from work to talk about it.

 

“You’re still up?” Lila queried. “Something wrong?”

 

“I think so, Mom,” Robert answered. “Ben’s almost never home. He and Marty leave, saying they’re going to the store front, and they sometimes don’t get back here till after eleven o’clock. I drove past the store front a few times, and it was locked up and dark. I don’t think this is for good. Who knows what they’re up to, out so late, and lying to me about where they are.”

 

“I’ll talk to your dad about it when he gets home,” she offered. “Thanks for telling me.”

 

“OK I’ll go to bed now. See you, Mom,” said Robert as he started to leave the room. Then, pausing, he added, “Mom, have there been any phone calls for me in the daytime when I’m at work?”

 

“No, Robert, Did you expect a call?”

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied with some sadness showing on his young face. “I just thought maybe Penny would call. She’s been there nearly a month now. And, I don’t have a number to call her. It’s OK; I was just wondering, Mom.”

 

 

 

Two more months went by without any communication from Penny. She had promised to write or call Robert when she got settled in El Paso, as soon as she had an address and phone number to give him. Robert tried to hope she was just so busy with her first semester of nursing school that she had not had time to contact him. Yet, he was entertaining doubts about her interest in him.

 

Robert no longer made it a habit to attend Lester Chapel on first day evening services as he had been doing for a few months. Now, he found himself at Buckingham for most services. He was still faithful to the little Friends meeting on first day mornings.

 

He met his Uncle Bill one Saturday in the bank. They made small talk for a few seconds. Then, Bill asked, “Why aren’t we seeing you at church any more? Is it because your girl is no longer there?”

 

“That may be part of it, Uncle Bill,” the honest young man answered. “I was attending there before she was so you know I originally was there for the spiritual help I was getting. But, she provided a reason for me to attend there more often, that is, after we met.”

 

Bill, who often lacked a strong sense of propriety, could not resist speaking what was on his mind. “Penny said that you seemed a little shallow, not well grounded, she called it. Guess she may have been right. Think so?”

 

With an expression of shock on his face, Robert asked, “What did she mean by that? Did she really say such a thing?”

 

“Maybe I shouldn’t have told you, but yep, she said that, a couple of times while she spent those days at my house,” confessed Bill.

 

Incredulous, the young man asked, “Do you know what she meant, I mean, about me being shallow and not grounded? I never expected to hear such a thing from her.”

 

“Well, think about it, Robert,” began Bill. “You still attend the Friends Church, don’t you? That’s part of it.”

 

“Yes, I was saved in that church, and I’ve done a lot of growing because of that church,” responded Robert. “I don’t know a thing about the church that’s not good. I do remember, though, that Penny said something just one time about something being wrong with the Quakers. I don’t know what it could be, though. I find them closer than some of my own family, at least, in some ways.”

 

“Just pray about it, kid,” advised his uncle. “God will show you the truth if you’ll seek it. Just study and pray, and of course, we’ll be pleased as everything to have you become part of Lester Chapel, that is, after you see your error and correct it.”

 

“Don’t you think I’m a Christian, Uncle Bill?”

 

“Yes, absolutely, Robert,” was the answer. “Still, I think you need to learn the way more perfectly. That’s all.”

 

“Sure, I’ll pray for God’s guidance. I’m not too proud to change. Still, I don’t know what needs to be changed in my life,” answered the young Christian.

 

That conversation remained uppermost in Robert’s mind for some time. How he wished he knew what needed changing.

 

As the weeks passed, Lila and Chauncey became more observant of their youngest son, and of their boarder as well. They occasionally queried Robert about Ben’s activities. Stress seemed to be building as they worried over Ben’s attitudes and his friendships. Clearly, their baby was going down a wrong path.

 

Ben was nearly sixteen years old. He had finished driver’s education class just before Christmas, but had no car. At times, Robert had allowed him to use his car to drive to the grocery store in St. Leon but not often. The last few days, Robert noticed that Ben asked to use his car more often, and the reasons he offered were not realistic. Robert did understand that his little brother wanted to use his driving talent now that he had a license; that was rather normal. Still, he did not trust Ben enough to trust his car to him, especially with Martin so ever-present.

 

On a Saturday, just before Easter, Ben asked Robert, “Hey, big Brother, how about me taking your car to Adrian this afternoon? There’s a big mall there, and I wanted to take in some shopping. Any chance?”

 

“Sorry, Kid,” replied Robert. “Maybe I could drive you there, and even let you drive on the way, but I can’t give up my car for the whole afternoon.”

 

Ben was instantly agitated and began yelling at his brother. Martin heard the commotion and came running in. He quickly figured what initiated the loud outburst and joined Ben in verbally attacking Robert. This approach to dealing with Robert did not succeed. Robert became firm, letting his youngest brother know that his car was dedicated to wholesome activities and that Ben need never ask to use it again. “If you need to go somewhere, just ask me to take you there,” insisted Robert. “You do not get to take it without me being with you, never again!”

 

This incident rather polarized the relationship between Robert and Ben, and Robert felt sure that much of the bad attitude problem traced back to the presence of Martin Jackson. Robert doubted whether he and Ben could patch up their differences as long as Martin was around to influence the situation.

 

In the weeks which followed, Lila and Chauncey noticed more signs that their baby was slipping more deeply into a rebellious life style. Lile found a cigarette lighter in one of Ben’s shirt pockets when she did the family laundry. Chauncey found some empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, where he had pulled the latest car which had quit running and was ready to join the dozen or so others which would never run again. Ben’s attitude was becoming more bitter and hateful; he was secretive and displayed a spirit of resentment toward family activities, excusing himself from any plans which Lila tried to make for the family’s enjoyment.

 

 

 

A few weeks after finding the empty beer bottles at the back of the farm, Chauncey decided to walk back to look at his collection of non-functioning cars on a Sunday afternoon. When he returned to the house, his face showed as much anger as Lila had ever seen on it.

 

“Something’s wrong, Chauncey,” she guessed.

 

His response began with some vulgarity and arm waving. Then, he responded, “They’ve been back at my cars again. I’m going to put a stop to it. Where’s Ben and Marty?”

 

“Down at the store front, I think,” Lila answered. “What’s happened, Chauncey? Did you find more beer bottles?”

 

“More that that!” he replied. “They’ve got blankets down there in that old station wagon, and yes, more beer bottles, some not opened yet, but it’s worse than that. I found some women’s underwear and this.” He handed a small clutch purse to Lila.

 

Robert appeared apprehensive as his mother unsnapped the purse and pulled out a wallet, looking for identification in it. He felt he recognized the purse. Before looking at the identification card, Lila noticed what Robert expected her to find, a wallet-sized copy of his high school graduation picture.

 

A puzzled look clouded Lila’s face, and she looked up at Robert. “Have you been back there with someone, Robert?”

 

“Absolutely not!” he answered. “That stuff is not mine, but I think I know whose purse that is. It looks like Sandra’s, but I haven’t been back there with her. I’ve not been anywhere with her for many months, not since I met Penny at church.”

 

“It’s Sandra’s purse all right,” said Lila as she examined the ID card in the purse. “If Robert hasn’t been back there, what does this mean?”

 

“Looks like Ben or Martin have been seeing Robert’s old girl friend,” answered Chauncey, the blood vessels standing out strongly on his forehead. “I want to see them when they get back here.”

 

He did not see his youngest son, though, until after eleven o’clock that night. Ben and Martin were dropped off at the farmhouse by someone in an old pickup truck. Chauncey was waiting when they sneaked quietly in the back door of the old farmhouse.

 

“Son, I want to see you,” Chauncey announced as the back door closed. “Come on in here.”

 

“I gotta go upstairs first, Dad,” answered the sixteen-year-old. “Be back down in a minute.”

 

“No come in here now! You can go upstairs later,” replied the tired father. “And if Martin is with you, he should come in here, too.”

 

“He’s tired so he wants to go straight to bed,” said Ben. Chauncey could hear the two young men whispering in the darkness and suspected that they had reasons to not want him to see them.

 

“No, I expect to see both of you in here, now!” yelled Chauncey. “We have important things to discuss, all three of us. Get in here, now!”

 

Defiance showed clearly on the faces of both Martin and Ben as they entered the living room where Chauncey was waiting.

 

“Sit down, both of you,” demanded the head of the house. “We’re going to have the truth so don’t plan to try to fool me.”

 

“What’s this about, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin, trying to not reveal the disdain he felt for him.

 

“Just wait for me to ask the questions, Martin,” said Chauncey. “I’m in charge here. I’ll ask, and you two are to provide answers. OK?”

 

“Sure, of course, Mr. Lewis,” replied Martin. Ben, too, had decided to appear pleasant toward his father, as Martin was trying to do. He nodded his concurrence with Martin’s attitude, at least for the time being.

 

Pulling out the female underwear he had found in the old station wagon, Chauncey asked, “What’s this all about, boys?”

 

Quickly becoming red-faced and finding it harder to swallow, Ben gulped, “What do you mean, Dad? It looks like girls’ unmentionables.”

 

“Where in the world did you get that stuff, Mr. Lewis?” asked Martin with a forced chuckle.

 

Giving the young men a piercing stare, Chauncey asked, “You mean you guys don’t know anything about this?” After a long pause, he continued, “I found them in my old Ford station wagon I pulled to the back of the farm a while back. And, that’s not all, either. I found beer bottles, some empty and some not yet opened. I found blankets out there, too. Looks as though someone’s been engaging in some hanky-panky with a girl.”

 

“You’re not serious, Mr. Lewis,” chuckled Martin as he glanced toward Ben. “Are you grilling us because you found that stuff out back? If so, you got the wrong person. Just ask Ben, here. We’ve seen somebody going back there, but you’d never believe who it was. Right, Ben?”

 

With a somewhat blank look, Benjamin nodded agreement with his older friend. “Yeah, Dad. If we told you, you’d have trouble believing who’s been spending time back there.”

 

“Give it a try, Son,” urged Chauncey. “I want to know who’s been back there in my car. Mind you, I know it wasn’t just one person. Ben, who were they?”

 

Before Ben could answer his father, Martin spoke up, “We really don’t want to tell you, Mr. Lewis. You’d be very upset.” As Ben nodded his agreement, Martin continued to take charge of the confessions. “If you insist, I’ll tell you, but I’d prefer to say nothing. Maybe it would be best if we just kind of reported to you if they go back there again. We’ll be your watchdogs.”

 

Having allowed the two teens to express their alibis, the older man interrupted, “There were three or more of you out there, boys.” He watched their faces, noticing that Ben was depending on Martin to provide a remedy for their predicament.

 

“Hey, don’t look at us,” tried Martin. “We saw one of your sons and his former girl friend out there, more than once.” Pausing to let Chauncey process this new information, he grinned at Ben as if to suggest that he had just rescued them from further interrogation.

 

Chauncey picked up part of what Martin had just said and added, “You’ve given me part of the truth, Mr. Jackson. But, you twisted it, didn’t you?”

 

Assuming an air of righteous indignation, Marty countered with, “Sir, I resent the implication. It’s the truth. Your oldest son has been taking his old girl friend back there. We’ve seen Robert and Sandra sneaking to the back of the farm, haven’t we Ben? At least two times.”

 

Ben was unable to hide the shock of what he had just heard. Still, he tried to vouch for Martin’s story, saying, “We didn’t want to tell you, Dad. You and Mom seem to think Robert’s an angel or something, but what Marty told you is the truth. He’s got a phony ID and has been buying beer and drinking it with Sandra while you and Mom are at work at night. That’s the honest truth, Dad.”

 

Incredulous, the tired old father replied, “That’s just not believable, boys. Robert is living a good life, and I can’t find any way to believe he’s drinking and living an immoral life with Sandra. He quit seeing her over six months ago.” Watching the young men’s faces, he added, “I’ll ask Robert about your claim, but I’m sure I’ll be talking to you two again about all this.”

 

“You don’t trust me at all, and neither does Mom,” an angry Ben yelled. “Robert gets treated the best of any of us, all the time, and I’m tired of it.” He stomped away with Marty following closely behind.

 

Chauncey allowed them to leave without any more discussion. He would check out their accusation of Robert and then, he would determine the reaction he should take.

 

It wasn’t until two days later that Chauncey found the opportunity to talk to his oldest son. Because they worked different shifts, Robert and his father seldom saw each other.

 

Robert took a day off work. It was something he seldom did, but he felt it was necessary. He planned to try a plan, an idea which had occurred to him. Telling no one the reason he took the day off work, he decided to drive to Adrian to the Navy recruitment office. Discouragement was his constant companion any more, it seemed. Because Penny had gone to Texas and not bothered to contact him in any way, he felt life held little for him. Perhaps by joining the Navy he would find more reason to exist.

 

As he was about to walk out of the old farmhouse to get into his car, he noticed Chauncey walking toward the kitchen.

 

“You’re up kind of early today, aren’t you, Dad?”

 

True to his nature, Chauncey had few words, “Yep, I am. But, you’re running sort of late for work, aren’t you?”

 

“Well,” began Robert, “I called in to take the day off. I’m going to Adrian--on business. I mean, I didn’t quit or anything, Dad.”

 

“I’d hope not,” answered the Scotchman, again true to his practical nature. “You can’t pay bills without a job.”

 

“Right, Dad,” smiled Robert. “See you later. Maybe I’ll be home before you and Mom leave for work.”

 

“Wait, Robert,” demanded the father. “Got a minute to answer a question for me?”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Robert replied. “What is it?”

 

“Son, somebody told me that you and Sandra are seeing each other again, now that Penny has left. Is it true?”

 

“No way in the world; that’ll never happen,” was the answer. “Who would say that?”

 

“You haven’t been back on the back of the farm with her at night?” pried Chauncey.

 

“Absolutely not!” Robert snapped. “What is this all about? I’m not interested in someone of her type. I thought you knew that. Now, Dad, tell me. Who’s spreading these stories about me?”

 

“Your brother and Martin both said it,” Chauncey said. “Now, give me the truth, Son.”

 

With a clear, open countenance, Robert answered his tired-looking father. “Dad, it’s not true, not at all. I have nothing to do with Sandra. Sure, I miss Penny, a lot, but I will never return to someone like Sandra. I’ll have a Christian girl or no girl at all. Believe me!”

 

“I do believe you, Robert,” the father replied with a rather warm smile. “I really have a lot of confidence in you. To be honest, the only reason I questioned you is because I told Ben and Martin that I would ask you. That’s all. I would have been disappointed if you were guilty of what they said.”

 

“Thanks, Dad,” Robert managed to say. How he wished it was considered proper in their home to hug each other once in a while. This would have been a perfect time for him to give his father a bear hug, but he knew that Chauncey would not reciprocate. Fearing rejection by his father, Robert restrained himself.

 

“Now, go on to do your business at Adrian, Robert,” commanded Chauncey. “I’ll not bring this subject up to you again. Oh, I’m not a praying man, as you know, but I might be grateful if you would pray for - - for how I should deal with Ben and Martin. I know it’s only a couple of weeks until graduation, and Martin will be gone from here, but I guess I have to do something about him staying here, even that long.”

 

“Sure, Dad,” answered Robert. “I’ve been praying about it a lot anyhow. See you later.”

 

Driving to Adrian, Robert did some thinking, followed by some praying. It was a common activity for him as he drove. He prayed about many things whenever he was driving, both trivial things and important ones. Once, he even prayed for a dove which had flown into his car as he drove. He watched it in the rearview mirror as it flopped before dying. He prayed for God to let it die quickly with little suffering.

 

Today, besides praying about the reason for this trip, to try to join the Navy, he prayed about Ben’s obvious rebellion. He also did some deep thinking and praying about his family’s hang-up about showing emotions toward each other. Why did their affection always need to be expressed only in non-verbal and non-tactile ways? Hugs were avoided as were loving words.

 

“It almost seems that emotions must be a gift from Satan, that God does not want people to have emotions. That’s how my family acts,” he thought.

 

All too soon, he arrived at the Armed Forces Recruiting Center in Adrian. He was apprehensive about actually entering the building to express his intention. Would they consider him silly? They were always advertising for men to join, but would they want someone with as many reservations about serving as he had?

 

He found the correct office and slowly entered. A man in a crisp uniform came to the counter to meet him. “Hello, I’m Sergeant Williams,” greeted the Navy recruiter, offering a handshake to Robert.

 

Responding by shaking the officer’s hand, Robert answered, “I’m Robert Lewis.”

 

“Well, Mr. Lewis, can I get you some coffee or something?” offered the Navy man.

 

 

 

“No, thanks,” Robert replied. “I just need to talk to someone about maybe joining the Navy.”

 

“Sure, we always need men to serve our country,” he said. “Do you happen to have your Selective Service card with you? I can look up your file and begin talking.”

 

Robert found the card in his wallet and handed it to the recruiter. “Here it is.”

 

“Oh, I see you’re a CO. Is that correct?”

 

Embarrassed at not knowing what “CO” means, Robert answered, “Am I a CO? I’m not sure what a CO is.”

 

Patiently, the recruiter explained, “I can’t take a CO into most areas of the Navy. If you ask to change your status, I can consider you for more things. I could possibly take you into some type of non-combat service, like perhaps a medic or a chaplain. Do you have church credentials or medical training, Robert?”

 

“No, I don’t have either,” answered Robert. “But, I don’t know what you mean by ‘CO’.”

 

With a touch of mockery in his voice, the recruiter replied, “You are one, and you don’t know it? I take it you are either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Quaker, am I right?”

 

“Yes, I’m a member of St. Leon Friends Meeting; that’s a Quaker.”

 

“Then, why are you trying to join the Navy? Most of the Quakers are conscientious objectors,” the Navy man queried. “Do you really feel this way, or is it just some teaching of your church? Not many religious people can get by with asking for CO status, but Quakers get it.”

 

“Oh, I really believe that way,” Robert answered when he finally realized what the ‘CO’ referred to. “I prayed about it a lot when I had to fill out the Selective Service forms on my eighteenth birthday. I know for sure that I could not ever use a weapon and kill anyone.”

 

“For any reason?” asked the recruiter. “How about for self defense or to defend your family?”

 

“I’ve never had to defend myself to that extent, or my family, either, so I can’t say for sure. But, I really doubt I could do it,” Robert explained. “I’d try to trust the Lord to take care of me. If not, I’m ready to go to Heaven at any time. I really think I’m a CO.”

 

“It doesn’t look like I can use you, Robert. Unless there’s a war we can’t take a CO except for religious duties, and sometimes, for some medic duties,” the Navy man said, displaying a sense of superiority. “If you change your mind, come and see me. Have a good day, Mr. Lewis.”

 

Robert’s thoughts, as he drove back to St. Leon, led to feelings of rejection. Penny, whom he had felt sure would be a major element in his future, rejected his love and moved to Texas. His youngest brother had begun spreading lies about him. Now, even the Armed Forces would not accept him and even made him feel foolish for believing the doctrines of the Friends Church. Disappointment and depression were gaining a firm hold on his heart.

 

Robert prayed most of the way back to St. Leon. The half-hour drive was not long enough for him to express the discouragement he was feeling. Still, as he prayed, some thoughts from Sister Liming’s latest message at Buckingham Church returned to Robert.

 

“Many people are foolishly bound to evil habits and evil associations,” Mrs. Liming had said. “Perhaps most of us seem foolishly bound to something in our lives. As for me, I’d rather be considered a fool for God than a fool for any other cause.” How encouraging it was for Robert to recall this message from the little Quaker preacher. Let people think of him as foolishly attached to the teachings of the Master of masters.

 

“I’ll be a fool for God,” Robert told himself audibly as he neared the old farmhouse which was home.

 

His parents had not yet left for work. Robert noticed that Chauncey had his pickup truck loaded with what was clearly Martin Jackson’s belongings. It was obvious that the young man who had been such a bad influence on Ben was being moved out.

 

As he approached the house, Robert could hear lively discussions.

 

“I don’t want that bedroom again!” It was Ben’s voice, clearly filled with anger. “Just keep it! I’ll sleep in the dungeon that you forced me into when Grandma moved in, at least, until I move away.”

 

“Take whichever you prefer,” the older voice of the head of the home responded. “The better room is yours if you want it. If you don’t want it, maybe one of your brothers will take it, and you can have their room. But, it’s settled, and you can’t change my decision. Martin is not to return to this house for any reason, ever!”

 

“I’m out of here!” Again, it was Ben’s excited voice. “I’m not sure I’ll ever come back. Why was I born? It’s sure that you didn’t want me! Why was I even born?”

 

As Ben stomped out the back door, he nearly collided with Robert, who was about to go in.

 

`”You!” shouted Ben upon seeing his oldest brother. “I hate you! Get out of my way, and out of my life!”

 

“Wait! What have I done, Ben?” returned Robert.

 

“Never mind!” returned the sixteen-year-old. “Just leave me alone, all of you. I’m getting out of this family, just as soon as I can.”

 

 

 

Needless to say, the next few days were tension-filled in the Lewis home. Ben did come back home as he had nowhere else to go. Martin had decided to have Chauncey drive him to the home of another guy who spent a lot of time at the store front. He would finish the last two weeks of his senior year there and then move back in with his father.

 

With summer upon them, Ben decided to work for every farmer in the area who would take him on. He helped with late planting, then with cultivating and making hay. He was bringing in more money than he had ever dreamed he could. He told no one how much he made nor what he was doing with it. He didn’t seem to be spending much of his earnings.

 

With school over until September, Robert added some overtime to his work schedule. He spent weekends and many evenings at camp meetings within driving distance of home. He decided to be as spiritual as possible, and attendance at the summer camp meetings seemed the most natural route to the spirituality he sought.

 

He not only attended the annual Buckingham Community Church Tent meeting; he worked in it as well. Usually, Mrs. Liming’s three daughters and one son were the featured musicians at the Buckingham tent meeting. This year was no exception. The Liming Quartet provided special music while a minister from Colorado served as evangelist. Mrs. Liming asked Robert to provide short devotional lessons during the half-hour prayer time before each evening service.

 

It seemed natural for special friendships to develop between the workers during this two week period of working closely together to try to evangelize the Buckingham community. Even Sister Liming did not seem surprised that her oldest daughter, Emily, was spending a lot of time near Robert. They were both burdened for the success of the tent services; they were both considered part of the evangelization team this year. Before the two weeks were over, they were inseparable, sitting together during the preaching time, watching each other prepare for their respective duties in the services, even working together to pick up litter or straighten song books before and after services. It was a wholesome picture, two young people working together to further the work of God’s Kingdom.

 

Although she did not attend the services at Buckingham, Lila became aware of Robert’s new interest during those services. Although she, too, had hoped for a long-term development between Robert and Penny, she felt that his interest in Emily was a good second choice for him.

 

During those two weeks at the Buckingham tent services, Robert did a lot of secret praying, praying at home late at night, and even praying during the night if he awakened. He felt it was his lot to intercede for his lost brothers, especially for Ben, who made it clear that he wanted nothing more than to find a way to leave the Lewis home. Robert felt that he was the one God depended on to pray for Ben.

 

When Robert suggested to Ben that he attend the Buckingham tent services, Ben mocked. “What do you think I am, the Prodigal Son or something?” he sneered. “I haven’t left my father’s house, yet. I’m not the Prodigal until I go away so leave me alone until then, OK?”

 

Robert tried to reason with his little brother, “You have two fathers who care a lot about you, Ben. Our dad cares about you. That’s why he sent Marty away, to protect you from a bad influence. But, you have a Father in Heaven who cares much more than Dad does.”

 

“Listen, big preacher-man brother of mine,” said Ben. “I don’t think Dad cares, nor Mom, nor you. You hear me? And, as for God, He’s for weaklings who go to a church that believes you shouldn’t fight. You’ll all find out soon enough that I don’t go for that stuff. I’m part Irish and part Indian, and I’ll fight, and I’ll win, without a god to do it for me. Now, leave me alone.”

 

Robert had done all that he knew to do for his brother. He prayed, he invited, and he tried to show love to one who did not seem to want any love. What more could he do?

 

The tent meeting ended with no new converts from Robert’s household. He had been praying diligently for the salvation of his parents and brothers. He had even fasted a couple of meals during the last week of the campaign but saw no fruits for his efforts.

 

Sister Liming became aware of Robert’s disappointment concerning his unsaved family. She did what she could to encourage him to continually trust God to intervene in the lives of members of the Lewis family. “Who knows what God has planned for the future?” she encouraged. “He has ways of dealing with people which we could never think of. Just trust Him, Robert.”

 

Because of his involvement in the tent campaign, Robert began to feel more involved in the ministries of Buckingham Church. He began to spend more time in attendance there. He was also a more frequent guest in the Liming home. By the time school started again, Robert had decided that God wanted him to give up his position at the St. Leon Friends Meeting and attend exclusively at the Buckingham Community Church. When the St. Leon Friends people inquired, Robert advised them that he had not forsaken the Quaker church since Buckingham was largely a Quaker meeting. He reminded them that he had asked them to have more services per week and that they had refused. He now chose to attend Buckingham since they had three services each week, regardless of low attendance. He felt this was commendable.

 

Robert received intense spiritual support from Mrs. Liming and her small congregation. He shared his burdens for his family, especially for Ben. The name of Benjamin Lewis was lifted in nearly every service at Buckingham. Robert felt they were, in effect, building a great hedge around his youngest brother, a hedge of God’s awareness of the young man and of God’s interest in him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, Ben was still going to the store front every night. Kerry and Robert kept their parents informed of the activities, of the young people who patronized the store front, and the lateness of Ben’s return home each night. His attitudes had shown no improvement. Although he spent much time doing odd jobs for neighboring farmers, he spent little money. Most of his earnings went into the bank.

 

On Halloween night, Ben told Kerry and Robert that he was going to ‘trick or treat’ in the neighborhood. He wore some of his dad’s old bib overalls and carried a large bag when he left. No one knew what he had in the bag.

 

When Lila got home around midnight, Robert and Kerry were still up, waiting for their parents to get home.

 

“Why are you guys still up?” she asked. “Something wrong?”

 

“It’s Ben,” said Kerry. “He didn’t come home from his Halloween ‘trick or treating’. We’ve looked all over for him and can’t find him.”

 

“He took a big bag full of something when he left,” Robert added. “I and Kerry just got done looking in his room, and most of his clothes are gone.”

 

Beginning to cry, Lila said, “I’ve been expecting to hear something like this. We’ve not been able to reach him, to convince him that we care for him.”

 

“We’ve all tried, Mom,” said Robert, placing an arm over his mother’s shoulders. “He just rejects us, all of us, every time we approach him.”

 

When Chauncey entered the house a few minutes later, he knew the news was not good. “Something’s happened to my boy, hasn’t it?” he asked.

 

Kerry nodded without looking up at his father.

 

Calls to the police, calls to area hospitals, calls to Ben’s friends turned up no news as to the whereabouts of the youngest Lewis boy.

 

They all went to bed around five o’clock in the morning, but none slept much. No one admitted to the rest of the family that they had spent some tearful hours, but each one had wrestled with his heartbreak in his own way.

 

Two weeks later, a card arrived with a Chicago postmark. When Lila returned from the mailbox, she handed the card to Chauncey. “It’s from our son.”

 

His voice broke as he read it aloud. “It says, ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m OK. Just forget me. Ben’.”

 

Through her tears Lila said, “It reminds me of what a preacher said many, many years ago about Judas. ‘He went out, and it was night’.” She cried bitterly.

 

“Yes,” said Robert. “I heard that verse a few weeks ago at camp meeting and marked it in my Bible.” Looking in the concordance of his Thompson Chain Reference Bible, he added, “Yes, here it is, in John, chapter thirteen. It says, ‘He went out, and immediately, it was night’.”

 

Chapter 9: Impact of a Storm

 

 

Months went by with no more contact from Ben. The boys seldom mentioned him, as they did not want to make their parents recall the pain of losing him. Robert continued to pray for his brother every day and requested prayer for him at church.

 

By taking nine hours of college work per semester, Robert was in his junior year by May of 1957. He kept watching the mailbox during the first week of June, looking for his grade report for the semester he had just finished. It arrived the first Saturday of June. Actually, he received several interesting pieces of mail that day, besides his grade report.

 

Robert had been writing to several mission boards for several weeks. He had been feeling some pulling toward Christian service for months and felt he should investigate the possibility of service whenever he finished college. Those letters, along with his grade report, made for a windfall of good mail that Saturday.

 

However, another letter interested Robert more than any of the others. There was no return address. It was postmarked, ‘El Paso, TX’. The handwriting seemed familiar to Robert. His heartbeat seemed to have speeded to a very high rate. Could this be the letter he had hoped to receive nearly a year and a half ago?

 

Lila noticed the excitement on her son’s face as he entered the farmhouse and handed her all except four envelopes. “You got your grade?” she guessed.

 

“Yes Mom, but more than that,” he excitedly exclaimed. I got my grades and some letters from mission boards and ....”

 

“Mission boards?” The familiar worried look crossed her face. “You’re writing to mission boards, Son?”

 

“Yes, Mom, but even better, look at this one.”

 

He showed her the unopened letter from El Paso. His face beamed. “I’m going to read it upstairs.”

 

“Who’s it from?” asked Lila. “Who do you know in Texas?”

 

He didn’t answer but just bounded the stairs and let his bedroom door slam shut. It was about ten minutes later that he reappeared in the living room, wearing a large smile.

 

“Mom, it’s from Penny,” he announced, his face wreathed in a gigantic smile. “I finally got a letter from Penny.”

 

“That’s great, Son!” Lila returned. “What’s the news from her, coming back here?”

 

“No, it doesn’t look like it,” he replied. “Still, it is good to hear from her. She’s not in nursing school right now. She dropped out after one semester and hasn’t returned to it yet. She says she’s home schooling some Mexican children and plans to lead some daily vacation Bible schools this summer there in the El Paso area.”

 

“Why did she wait so long to write?” asked the mother.

 

“I don’t know; she didn’t say,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter, though. At least, I heard from her.”

 

He had not forgotten her during the seventeen months of her absence. Sure, he had been seeing Emily Liming, but his mind often returned to memories of the days with Penny. He had never consciously considered dropping the relationship with Emily if Penny should re-enter his life. However, now, it was a very real consideration.

 

Robert wrote a long letter to Penny that same evening and drove into town to mail it. He wanted it to get to her as quickly as possible. He informed her of the activities in the various churches; he told her of his slow progress at the community college; of course, he shared the account of Ben’s disappearance. He hoped that she would answer his letter promptly and give him some glimmer of hope that she may some day return to Michigan.

 

To Robert’s surprise, within ten days he received a second letter from Penny. It contained happy thoughts, a few clippings about home mission work among the Mexican people along with some snapshots which Penny had taken over the months. Each photo had writing on the back to explain its significance. No news, though, about returning.

 

Robert found himself spending less time at the Liming home. He wrote twice a week to Penny but continued to sit with Emily in church. He did not, however, continue taking her out on Friday nights for a meal. Somehow, his heart was not involved when he was with Emily, not the way it had been up to his receiving the letters from Penny.

 

Lila noticed the change in Robert. He no longer talked of Emily. She noticed that he was receiving a letter every week from El Paso and that he seemed to be sending out a lot of mail. She guessed it was to Penny.

 

At the end of the summer, Lila received a letter from Emily Liming. Emily was concerned about the changes in Robert’s attitudes toward her. She asked Lila to write back if she knew why Robert was becoming more detached. “Is it that I have done or said something that offended him?” she asked in the letter. “Please contact me if you know what the problem concerns.”

 

Lila did not write back to Emily. She did try to talk to Robert about his sudden coolness to Emily, but she got no satisfactory response from him.

 

“I’m not ready to talk about it,” Robert advised his mother. “Sometimes, I think you become too much involved in my personal affairs. Really, Mom, sometimes I feel you are desperately trying to get me married off. I can make that decision for myself whenever I feel it is the right time.”

 

“I’m sorry if you feel I’m crowding your life,” Lila offered. “I am concerned about you and the other two boys as well. I want you to find good wives and have happy lives and give me some grandchildren.”

 

With an expression of exasperation, Robert said, “What’s the rush, Mom? I’m only twenty-one, you know. I have enough common sense to know what kind of person I want for a wife. I don’t intend to be pushed into something I really don’t want. I’ll decide for myself whether to keep seeing Emily.”

 

“Don’t you think she’s a good Christian, Robert?”

 

“Sure, she is. But, that’s not reason enough to get serious enough to talk about marriage,” he reasoned. “I must pick the one who is right for me.”

 

“And Emily isn’t right for you?” Lila questioned. “It’s because Penny began writing to you, isn’t it?”

 

“I’m interested in Penny, for sure,” he confessed. “I don’t know that she’s the one for me, but it could be the case. I don’t know yet.”

 

“So, it’s rather useless for Emily to think seriously about you, isn’t it?”

 

“I don’t know,” Robert scolded. “Just let me direct my own life, OK?”

 

Lila realized that she had meddled too much. She kept her impressions to herself and refused to contact Emily. It was difficult, as she felt the Liming girl deserved a better explanation than she was receiving from Robert.

 

The next Sunday, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Church for their morning service. It felt so good to him to sit with Brother and Sister Wibel again. He felt very much at home with this group of Quakers who had loved him into the Kingdom of God. Robert was strongly tempted to return to this Quaker meeting for his regular worship. However, it still bothered him that they only met once per week.

 

On Sunday evening, Robert was back at Buckingham, sitting with Emily, enjoying the spirited message with Emily’s mother delivered. He felt as much at home here as he did at the St. Leon Friends Meeting. It occurred to him, though, that Penny would not have approved of either church. He recalled her scolding tones when she advised him nearly two years earlier that the Friends’ doctrine was less than acceptable.

 

Just as the service was ending, as the Limings and their small group were bidding ‘good evening’ to each other, the electric power went out, not only in the church building but in all the houses in the little town.

 

“My, look at that stormy sky,” Mr. Liming said. “It looks bad over around St. Leon. Robert, you should be real careful as you drive home. This looks like tornado weather to me.”

 

“Yes, Brother Robert,” agreed the lady pastor. “Take it easy. I’ll be praying for you as you drive. God is in control. He has a plan for everything. Remember, ‘all things work together for good’.”

 

Robert felt uneasy as he began the five mile drive back toward the farm. It was a really dark evening, and rain was beginning to pelt his windshield with great force. The wind was picking up, enough so that it became difficult at times to keep the car on the road. None of the farmhouses along the way had any lights on. Darkness seemed to close in on the young man as he headed home.

 

As Robert neared St. Leon, he saw lights, but they were not electric lights. He noticed red flashing lights, but they were beyond the railroad tracks, so he knew he was not seeing the railroad flasher. He concluded that it was some type of emergency vehicles. Approaching slowing, he saw the figure of a man trying to flag him to a stop. It was his father.

 

“Oh, Robert, it’s you!” yelled Chauncey. “We wondered if the tornado missed you over at Buckingham. Our little town is hurtint pretty badly.”

 

Robert learned that the damage was still unknown as the enveloping darkness prevented rescuers, such as his father, from making much progress.

 

“You’ll have to take the half-mile road, Son,” advised Chauncey. “There are a lot of electric lines down here, and it’s not safe to come through. Tell Mom and Kerry that I’m OK. I’ll be home when we’re sure we’ve found everybody. Go on home, and keep Mom and Kerry inside. You never know what may have blown onto our farm. We’ll check tomorrow.”

 

“OK, Dad,” obeyed Robert. “Be careful, will you? I’ll be praying for you.”

 

Robert shared what news he had when he got home. Lila was worried; it was apparent. Kerry wanted to go out to help, but Robert told him that Dad had asked them to all stay inside until morning. In the daylight they could determine the damage to their farm as well as to the property of each of their neighbors.

 

They got ready for bed by the light of kerosene lamps and candles. No one slept, though, until they heard Chauncey come in through the back door. While Lila tried to prepare some food for her tired husband, the boys listened to his accounts of the damage.

 

“The Friends Church came down,” the weary man began. “The tornado twisted around something crazy. It didn’t hit Sam Cooper’s house, next door, but it hit two houses about a quarter mile away. It was crazy.”

 

“Two houses a quarter mile away, Dad?” repeated Kerry. “To the north or the south?”

 

Sadly, Chauncey answered, “To the north. That’s part of the really bad news, Honey,” he said as he looked at Lila. Tears formed in his eyes, but he held them back. “It took Jimmy’s wife and youngest girl. They’re dead.”

 

Everyone remained silent for several seconds. “Susie’s gone?” said Lila sadly. “And their little girl? Oh, no!”

 

“Is Jimmy all right?” asked Robert, concerned for his unsaved cousin. Jimmy Lewis had been raised in church but had never yielded his life to God. Now, some of Jimmy’s dearest family members were in the presence of God’s judgment seat.

 

“Yes, he’s OK,” replied Chauncey. “It was hard for him to have to help us get the bodies out. They had run to the garage when they realized it was a tornado, but it was too late. Susie and her daughter died in each other’s arms.”

 

Before sleep overtook Robert, it occurred to him that he had been insistent that the Friends Meeting should be having Sunday evening services. IF they had listened to him, there would have been several people in the meeting house when the tornado hit. Now, he was glad that they had not heeded his advice.

 

The next morning Chauncey determined that his farm had not suffered much damage from the storm. Several neighbors, however, had lost many buildings and livestock. Chauncey returned to his farmhouse around noon, having been out to try to help his neighbors. He grabbed his rifle and a box of shells.

 

“I’ve got to go to Wendell Penrod’s and shoot all his Angus cattle,” he announced.

 

“They’re all damaged from the storm?” asked Lila.

 

Shaking his head in disbelief, Chauncey answered, “No, that stupid insurance adjuster came out and said that they won’t pay for just part of the herd. The only way Wendell can get insurance payment is to destroy all his cattle, even the healthy ones. Seems crazy to me!”

 

Cleanup from the storm took a long time. Chauncey and his two oldest sons volunteered many hours to the neighbors to help them get some semblance of order back into their lives.

 

Some church-going neighbors suggested to the Committee of Ministry and Oversight of the St. Leon Friends Meeting that they should not rebuild the church building. They cited the low attendance, the agedness of many of the members and the fact that there was still a church in town as reasons to not rebuild. However, the decision was made to replace the house of worship. Instead of the high ceilings and tall belfry, the new structure would be about the size of an average ranch style dwelling and would be built of brick. One of the members had a son would draw up the plans; he was an architect in Chicago.

 

Robert felt pleased that the church would be rebuilt. He felt a closeness to this assemblage of Christians. It was, after all, the group who had led him to Christ Jesus. He began entertaining thoughts of returning to worship with his Quaker friends at St. Leon, even before they could rebuild.

 

The rebuilding the of the Friends Meeting House was scheduled to be finished in October of 1957. In the meantime, the other church in St. Leon offered to let the Quakers worship in their sanctuary on Sunday afternoons. The Ministry and Oversight Committee thanked the neighboring church for its kindness and accepted the offer.

 

Robert continued to attend Buckingham on First Day mornings. HE was able to spend the First Day afternoons with Wibels and the other St. Leon Quakers in their worship.

 

One of the letters which Robert received from Penny contained her thoughts about the destruction of the St. Leon Friends meeting house. She stated that it could be a sign from God, that perhaps Robert should consider possible reasons that God may have for allowing the church building to be taken.

 

“Mom, Penny seems to be glad that the Friends Church was destroyed,” Robert finally shared. “Why is she against that church? Do you know? I can’t figure it out.”

 

“Robert,” Lila began. “I used to be a good Christian, before I got married. I attended the Church of God, there in Wilshire, Ohio. We were a very conservative group, and God blessed us.”

 

“Yes,” Robert wished she would get to the point, if there was a pint to get to.

 

“Well, when we moved to St. Leon, I was looking for a conservative church for you boys to go to for Sunday School. Your Grandma Lewis was a good Christian, and she was going to the Friends Church. That was the main reason I decided to send you boys there.”

 

Her story was taking too long, in Robert’s opinion. “So, that doesn’t tell me anything bad about the church, Mom. What are you driving at?”

 

“Well, Son, sometimes I wonder if I made a mistake in sending you there,” Lila confided.

 

“Don’t you think Grandma Lewis is a Christian?” asked Robert. “I have a lot of confidence in her experience.”

 

“Yes, Robert,” Lila replied. “I think your grandma will be in Heaven. She’s a good woman.”

 

Robert could discern that his mother was having a hard time trying to express what was on her mind.

 

After quite a long pause, an uncomfortable, quiet time, Lila asked, “Robert, have you been baptized?”

 

“Not in water, no,” he answered. “But we believe in the baptism of the Holy Spirit.”

 

“Do you ever take communion, Son? That’s the Lord’s Supper.”

 

“You mean the bread and wine?” asked the young man. “No, but I have great communion with god. I spend lots of hours reading, praying, really worshipping in my bedroom. I see that as communion.”

 

Continuing, Lila asked, “Does the Friends Church in St. Leon ever have foot washing services?”

 

“No, I’ve never heard of such a thing,” confessed Robert. “Why all these questions, Mom? Is this what Penny and Uncle Bill and some other people are trying to say to me?”

 

Nodding, Lila said, “I think it is, Robert. It looks to me as though the Friends don’t do any of those things that most churches do regularly. They’re really different. Can’t you see that?”

 

“This is all new to me, Mom,” Robert confessed. “I’ve never heard any of this at the Friends Church, or at Buckingham either, for that matter. And I feel these are among the best people on Earth.”

 

“I wasn’t raised that way, Robert,” Lila countered. “I see all of those activities as Biblical expectations. Jesus was baptized, wasn’t He? And, didn’t He have communion at the Last Supper? I don’t remember all the things I learned as a youngster, Robert, but I’ve been doing a little studying, just in case you and I would ever have this discussion.” After a moment of silence, Lila went on, “I think these people are not living by the Bible.”

 

Robert took a couple of minutes to organize his thoughts before asking his mother some questions. He was trying to be honest, not defensive. He wanted his life to be pleasing to his Savior.

 

“Mom, could an unsaved person pretend to be a Christian and have a preacher baptize him? You think so?”

 

“No doubt, it has happened,” Lila responded.

 

“And, is there any reason why unsaved people cannot pretend to be Christians to they can take the bread and wine?”

 

“That has probably happened, too,” she answered.

 

“And how about going through some type of ceremony to wash people’s feet? No doubt, non-Christians have done that, too. Wouldn’t you agree?”

 

“Yes, that happens, I’m sure,” she conceded. “Still, Son, that doesn’t excuse real Christians from doing those things.”

 

Robert realized that the pause which followed added a dramatic flair to his next question.

 

Slowly, he asked, “Mom, if I were to die tonight, do you think I would go to Heaven?”

 

Her eyes filling with tears, Lila answered, “I know you would, Robert. I have no doubts at all. I can honestly say that I do not know anyone who lives a more careful life than you do. You’re a real Christian; you’re genuine.”

 

Lila never again brought up the subject. Neither did Robert. However, he continued to think about it.

 

On the second Sunday in October of 1957, Robert attended the St. Leon Friends service. Their new meeting house was nearly completed. However, they were still worshipping at the neighboring church on Sunday afternoons. Dedication of the new brick Friends Church was scheduled for the last Sunday of October.

 

Robert sat between L.G. Wibel and his wife during the afternoon service. After the service, he drove to the new building and waited for them to meet him there. He wanted to walk through the nearly-finished structure with his dear friends before they drove the eight miles to their home. This was a precious experience, both for young Robert and for the aged couple who claimed him as a spiritual son.

 

Two hours later, the phone rang in the Lewis home. Lila heard Robert talking to the caller and sensed that there was some serious conversation taking place.

 

She was standing at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room by the time Robert hung up. “It’s some kind of bad news, isn’t it, Robert?”

 

“In a way, yes, it’s bad news,” Robert said.

 

“What is it?”

 

“Wibels were in an accident, on the way home from church this afternoon,” said Robert. There was some degree of sadness in his countenance. Yet, he did not seem especially upset. “They are home now, in Heaven.”

 

Lila wanted to comfort her son, but he did not seem to need much comforting. He appeared content, as if he knew they were happy.

 

“I’m so glad we stopped at the new church house before they started home,” Robert shared. “But, they’re in a much more wonderful temple now. I’m happy for them.”

 

Chapter 10: Influence of Sons

 

 

During the next two years, Robert worked at the same job and took part-time classes at the community college. He continued to see Emily at church but no longer considered dating her. He received an occasional letter from Penny, still in Texas but not studying nursing.

 

During one of the Buckingham Community Church’s summer tent meetings, Robert invited Barbara Hendrix to attend with him. She had been a classmate in high school and a rather unpopular girl. Her lack of popularity seemed to be the result of her family’s poverty. Her father was chronically unemployed, and the large family lived a rather meager existence much of the time.

 

Barbara accepted Robert’s invitation to the tent meeting. She apparently considered this to be date with Robert. He, on the other hand, considered it an opportunity to expose her to the Gospel message.

 

She went forward at the first invitation from the evangelist. Her spiritually hungry heart eagerly embraced the message of salvation. She eventually became a strong element in the small Buckingham Community Church.

 

Robert’s one-on-one ministry to Barbara was seen by Emily Liming as an insult. She and Robert discontinued their practice of sitting together at church. It was over. Robert did not seem too upset about the situation.

 

Barbara, too, soon came to understand that Robert’s interest in her was entirely prompted by a concern for her salvation. Though perhaps a little disappointed, she was very grateful that he had managed to lead her to the Lord.

 

 

 

Robert looked forward to the completion of his college studies. He hoped to be finished by May of 1960. It had taken a long time for him, taking only two or three courses per semester most semesters. A couple of semesters had been full-time studies. Now, he could see the light at the end of the tunnel. In just seven or eight months he would have a teaching degree and be ready for whatever God’s plan included for him. How he wished that Penny had stayed around to share his future. He felt so unfulfilled so much of the time lately.

 

As Thanksgiving neared, Lila began making plans to prepare the traditional meal. It promised to be a repetition of last year’s Thanksgiving. The table seemed too empty with Ben gone, and no doubt, Robert and Kerry would not have lady friends to invite this year.

 

“I don’t know whether to kill the only tom turkey we have this year or to settle for a hen,” she shared with Chauncey on Sunday afternoon. “I’ve got to decide by Tuesday or so, I guess. What do you think?”

 

“We’ll eat leftover turkey, Honey,” he replied. “I want a big bird again. Go ahead and kill the tom.”

 

“I guess I will, then,” she agreed. “I think turkey is one of the favorite meats of Robert and Kerry.”

 

As they were agreeing to kill their tom turkey, the telephone rang. Kerry, standing near the kitchen window, answered it.

 

“Hello. What? Oh, yes! Just a minute! I’ll get her! Hold on! Don’t hand up!” Yelling loudly, Kerry called, “Mom! Mom, come quickly! Hurry! It’s Benjamin!”

 

“It can’t be! Oh, Chauncey, can it be?” she cried, running to the kitchen to grab the phone from Kerry. She was closely followed by Chauncey, his eyes wide with anticipation.

 

“This is Lila!” she said, trying to be calm. After a few minutes of listening, she broke down. Unable to control her crying, she handed the phone to her husband.

 

“Ben, is it you?” he asked. “Yes, this is Dad. How are you, my Son?” He listened, trying to control his emotions, trying to maintain his tough man image. It was a losing battle, however. “Talk to Kerry for a second, Ben. I’ll talk to you again in a moment.” He handed the phone back to Kerry.

 

Kerry maintained more emotional control than either of his parents. He talked for two or three minutes, while Lila and Chauncey regained enough composure to talk to their youngest son again.

 

“I’m back, Ben,” said the father, taking the phone from Kerry. “No, Mom can’t talk right now. She’s so happy to hear from you that she can’t stop crying. You coming home, Son? We want you!”

 

Chauncey’s silence indicated that Ben was doing a lot of talking. Chauncey was again the stoic, unemotional man which the family knew him to be.

 

“Ben, I’ll sell a couple of pigs to wire the money to you,” Chauncey promised. “Paul Osborn has been wanting some of them; he’ll buy them tomorrow, I’m sure. By noon tomorrow, you should go to a Western Union office and pick up the money I’ll wire you. Mom and I had just been talking about killing the biggest turkey we have this year. I want you here to have the biggest drumstick you’ve ever had.”

 

A brief silence on Chauncey’s part signaled Ben’s attempt to communicate. Then, Chauncey resumed, “Son, take a train to Adrian. I’ll meet you. Let me know which train and what time. I’ll be there. Bye, my Boy, we’ll talk tomorrow when you’ve got your tickets.”

 

As Chauncey tried to share Ben’s conversation with Lila and Kerry, Robert arrived home. He could see that something had happened. He had never seen his father in tears before. Now, however, Chauncey was choking up as he shared the news that Ben wanted to come home for a visit.

 

“It will be a good Thanksgiving after all,” Lila rejoiced. “Kerry, will you help me catch the tom turkey in the morning before you go to school? I want to butcher it before I go to work tomorrow. We’re having a full-family Thanksgiving this year!”

 

“You know it, Mom!” beamed Kerry. “It will be great to have my brother back home. I’ll try harder to include him in my life, now. I think I failed him when he needed me.”

 

“I feel that way, too,” confided Robert. “I’ve felt guilty for a long time about not being more involved in Ben’s life.”

 

 

 

It was clumsy, trying to pretend that nothing had happened to their family, trying to not remember the anger which Ben had displayed just before he disappeared. Ben, too, was very ill-at-ease at meeting the family he had deserted three years earlier. No one asked him questions of a personal nature though everyone wondered about the type of life he had been living those three years in Chicago.

 

“I’m not staying, Mom,” Ben finally confided after the Thanksgiving meal. “I wanted to see how much damage I had done to all of you when I left the way I did. I need to go back to Chicago in a couple of days.”

 

“You’re welcome here, Son,” Lila offered. “Your room downstairs is still empty. Robert and Kerry refused to take it. They hoped you would return sometime. Now, you are back, and the room is yours.”

 

“I should have a wife, Mom,” he told her. “I fathered a little girl. It’s my duty to marry her mother and try to provide a home for them. I’m only nineteen and didn’t finish high school, and it’s hard to find good work. I did a lot of wrong things, and I hurt you and Dad. I also hurt the baby and it’s mother by my reckless life style. Now, I must marry my daughter’s mother and begin a home for them.”

 

“You’re probably right, Ben,” agreed Lila. “I still see you as my baby, and all of a sudden, my baby has a baby of his own, my first grandchild. Please arrange for me to get to see you.”

 

“You’ll see her, Mom,” Ben promised. “I don’t know how to tell Dad and Kerry and Robert.”

 

“Let me tell them, later. OK?”

 

“I’d hoped you’d say that, Mom.” He kissed her cheek, bringing a flood of tears to her eyes. “It doesn’t show, I know, but I love you, Mom.”

 

 

 

Lila waited until Ben returned to Chicago, at Chauncey’s expense, to tell her husband and sons about Ben’s family in Chicago. They all agreed that his marriage was the proper thing to do.

 

Ben kept his promise to his mother. He wrote a note to accompany the wedding announcement he sent them. In the note, he asked if he could bring his wife and daughter to visit during the Christmas season.

 

“What a great Christmas!” Lila beamed as she held her three-month-old granddaughter. “God’s gift to us, many centuries ago, was wrapped in a baby blanket, just like Ben’s gift to me.” She was all smiles. “I’m almost in Heaven, having all my family here, especially the newest member.”

 

Ben and his family planned to leave on a train to return to Chicago on the second day of January. He was in Lila’s kitchen, preparing some hot chocolate, when the phone rang. As no one else was in the house besides his wife and baby, he answered the phone.

 

“This is the Lewis residence,” he announced. “No, he’s not here right now. May I take a message? Really? I can’t believe it! Penny? No, I’m not Kerry; I’m Ben.”

 

Ben wrote the message on a note pad and left it on the table for Robert. However, everyone else read it before Robert did. Robert was the last one to arrive home that evening.

 

“Go ahead, Robert,” urged Lila. Her face nearly glowed, almost as though she had a halo. “We won’t stay in here and eavesdrop. Just call her, and talk as long as you want. Consider it a late Christmas gift from me to Penny.”

 

Robert dialed the number which Penny had given to Ben. Almost immediately, he was involved in a spirited conversation. Lila tried to keep Kerry and Ben and his wife busy in the living room, talking so much that it was not possible for any of them to hear much of Robert’s phone conversation. She had promised him some degree of privacy and intended to keep her word.

 

When the beaming Robert entered the living room a few minutes later, everyone seemed intent on voiding Lila’s promise to not delve into Robert’s business concerning Penny.

 

“Just hold the questions!” yelled Robert with one of the biggest smiles he’d worn for a long time. “Let me tell you about it.” Gently patting his moist eyes, he went on, “Penny is coming back to Adrian to finish her teaching degree. She wanted me to meet her at the Detroit airport and drive her back to Mrs. Draper’s again.”

 

“When?” Ben asked. “I and my family must return to Chicago the day after tomorrow.”

 

“Sorry, but you’ll just miss her,” Robert said. “She flies the next day. Her semester begins the third week of January so she will have about a week and a half to get settled. I’ll have her call you in a few days, Ben,” he promised.

 

Chapter 11: Love's Impact

 

 

It was the second Sunday of January. Robert attended the St. Leon Friends Meeting in the morning, singing and worshipping in his normal fashion. During the quiet time immediately after the Quaker-style prayer, he rose to his feet as a signal that he would like to give a few words of personal testimony. The pastor nodded toward him as a sign of recognition.

 

“I just wanted to say a few words. I don’t testify as much as many of you do, probably not enough, but I’m feeling something this morning and want to share it with you.” He paused to gather his thoughts, looked at the hymnal in his hand and then continued. “This song we sang a few minutes ago, In The Garden, always does something to me. The last verse in particular, though all three verses are really full of meaning, is my heart’s cry today. It says, ‘I’d stay in the garden with Him though the night around me be falling’. Friends, sometimes I wish the prayer time could go on and on, even longer than it does here. I really do enjoy being on my knees in prayer with Christians around me as we commune with God. Maybe that is the type of Christian service which God will call me to, I don’t know. I’m ready, though. I’m about through college with a teaching degree. I’m contacting Christian organizations about service. So far, I’m getting nothing which I feel is God’s leading for me. If I’m to be a prayer warrior, I say, God’s will be done.”

 

Several of the folk in the congregation uttered rather quiet ‘amens’. Knowing smiles were on the faces of some of the older saints, suggesting their understanding of Robert’s emotions. Some of them had been in Christian service in younger years. They found it easy to understand this earnest young Christian.

 

In the afternoon, Robert went to Bill and Beulah’s to see Penny. True, he could have waited until the evening service, but he knew she was spending the afternoon at his uncle’s house so he assumed it was acceptable to go visit with her.

 

Penny was taking an afternoon nap, but she got up when she became aware that Robert was waiting in the living room. Her big smile evidenced that she was pleased that he was there.

 

“Did you come to take me to the other Lewis farm? I’d like to see your parents and Kerry.”

 

The suggestion was an encouragement to the young man who had come to doubt that she had any interest in him at all.

 

After visiting with Lila, Chauncey, and Kerry for a while, Lila suggested that Penny stay for a simple supper with them before church time.

 

“Oh, is Robert going to my church tonight?” asked Penny with a grin. “I had heard that he seldom attended Lester Chapel any more.”

 

“Yes, you heard correctly, Penny,” said Robert. “However, I could be persuaded to start back there if the right person were to ask me.”

 

“Am I the one who should ask?” Penny teased. “OK, Mr. Lewis, I am inviting you to return to Lester Chapel, at least on First Day nights. Isn’t that how you Quakers refer to Sunday?”

 

“That’s how we have been saying it traditionally,” answered Robert. “But some are saying Sunday more often now, even me.”

 

“By the way, did you know that our new pastor at Lester Chapel is a Friend, too?” asked Penny. “It’s kind of strange how it happened. He’s a student at the Bible college, just like most of the pastors they’ve had. He tried out, and they gave him a call for a year. No one had thought to ask about his denominational history.”

 

“How to you know he’s a Quaker?” asked Lila.

 

“Well, Beulah told me around the lunch table today that he accidentally said something a few weeks ago during a sermon, something about “one faith, one Lord, and one baptism”. As he spoke more about that phrase, he said the baptism he referred to was the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I guess the church board met with him the next Thursday night after prayer meeting to get his views, and he told them,” explained Penny.

 

“That’s bad for him, isn’t it?” asked Robert. “They really don’t like Quakers, it seems.”

 

“No, not really,” said Penny. “They have always prided themselves on not being like the Quakers. However, everyone just loves Brother Fleetwood. His messages are so deep, and he seems to godly. I think they just asked him to not even mention from the pulpit that he’s a Quaker. They’ll keep him, at least for the contract year.”

 

During the evening service, Robert and Penny sat together again, just as they had done four years earlier, before Penny moved to Texas. Nothing was said about her not playing her clarinet although it was lying on the front pew where she had placed it after playing during the morning service.

 

The last song which the chorister announced for the congregation to sing was from the hymnal. Robert’s eyes spoke the feelings of his heart as he saw the title of the song, In The Garden.

 

“He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing, and the melody that He gave to me, within my heart is ringing,” sang Robert. As they sang the chorus, he could no longer hold back the tears. Penny smiled as she noticed the tears coursing down Robert’s cheeks while he tried to sing, “...and He tells me I am His own, and the joys we share as we tarry there, none other has ever known.”

 

After the service, Penny mentioned Robert’s tears. “You seem to be a crier,” she said. “I don’t mean that in a wrong way, just that God seems to bless you during the singing, and that you cry as a means of expressing the blessing.”

 

“I guess that’s right,” an embarrassed Robert confessed.

 

“Oh, don’t feel bad about it,” said his friend. “It’s good, very good. I know that it means that you have a very good devotional life. I respect that, a lot.”

 

Robert reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze in both of his hands.

 

 

 

Robert found himself attending the St. Leon Friends Church on Sunday mornings and Lester Chapel on Sunday nights and Thursday nights now that Penny had returned.

 

“May I come to Adrian and take you to dinner on Valentine’s Day, Penny?” Robert asked a couple of weeks later.

 

“Why on Valentine’s Day? Something special about that day?” smiled Penny.

 

“Not necessarily,” he replied. “Just that it’s a good occasion for flowers or candy, and I’ve never bought either of those things for you in the past. OK if I come over that evening? We can find a nice sit-down restaurant and enjoy a little quiet time together.”

 

“Sure, but let’s make it the day before Valentine’s Day, if you don’t mind. See, Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. I don’t really want to eat out on Sunday, not do I want to miss church that night.”

 

“Great with me!” exclaimed the young suitor. “I hadn’t realized that it was on a Sunday. We’ll make it Saturday night then.”

 

Robert asked Penny to pick a restaurant for their Valentine date. Upon arriving at the restaurant, she asked for a table near a window. That particular table had a red carnation in a white vase as a centerpiece.

 

“Isn’t this just like the flowers you brought to me tonight, Robert?” she asked. “I like red roses.”

 

“Well, it’s red, but this one’s a carnation. I gave you roses,” explained Robert. “Roses are better than carnations. At least, I think so.”

 

“But the roses have thorns, right?”

 

“Yes, roses have thorns, but their extra beauty is worth the risk of a little thorn prick.”

 

“I guess you’re right,” she acknowledged.

 

Clearly, they both enjoyed the fine meal and the relaxed atmosphere of the evening. Smiles seemed to be so easy to manufacture throughout the leisurely enjoyment.

 

Robert became a little nervous after the check was placed on the table. Clearly, something was on his mind. He could not hide his preoccupation.

 

“What are you thinking about, Robert?” Penny finally asked. “You seem so nervous or something the last few minutes. Is something wrong?”

 

“I hope not, Penny,” he responded. He cleared his throat, looked around to see how near the nearest occupied table was and decided to ask her.

 

“Penny.”

 

“Yes,” she answered after he remained silent for an uncomfortable amount of time.

 

“Penny,” he started again. “Remember, before you went to Texas?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, do you remember that I had an idea one day?”

 

“I remember one time that you had an idea that I didn’t want to think about at the time.”

 

“Yes, I think we’re both remembering the same idea I had,” said the young man. “Well, I still have that idea. The other time it was to keep you from going to Texas. Now, it’s just to keep you. Do you know what I mean?”

 

“Possibly I do, Robert. Why don’t we pay for the meal and go outside to talk, maybe in the car or somewhere more private than this restaurant.”

 

“Good suggestion,” he agreed.

 

The moon was shining through some pine trees which surrounded the restaurant. Through the windshield of the car, the couple could see the warm-looking moon. Robert started the car to let it warm up although it was a rather warm evening for February.

 

“Where should be go to talk?” asked Robert.

 

“This is a nice view here,” she replied, her warm smile removing whatever chill was in the air. “I’m warm enough, and enjoying watching the moon through those willow trees.”

 

“Pine trees,” he corrected.

 

“Oh, pine trees. I’m not much of a biologist.”

 

“That’s OK.” He reached for her hand. She slid toward him and allowed him to hold her left hand in both of his .

 

“Your idea?” she reminded.

 

“I think you know what I’m thinking, Penny,” he began. “I really did not want you to go to Texas, you know.”

 

“I know. I knew it then, and I know it now, but it was a good experience for me.”

 

“I’m about to the place where I can be free to travel, with my college graduation in just four months. I’ll have a teaching degree, and not many bills to catch up. If God would call me, I could go anywhere to serve Him.”

 

“Are you beating around the bush about something, Robert?” she asked him. “Just tell me what you’re thinking. You don’t want me to have to say it for you, do you?”

 

“No, I need to say it myself. I just need more courage than I seem to have.”

 

Knowing that her big, open smile often made situations easier for people, Penny allowed her face to bring a more relaxed state to the atmosphere.

 

“Thanks,” offered Robert. “That smile does so much to help me feel more at ease.”

 

“I know, Robert, and it is yours.”

 

“Does that mean that it is mine because you are mine?” Robert asked. “That’s not the speech I rehearsed but...”

 

“That’s what it means, Robert Lewis. That’s exactly what it means.”

 

“This makes my next question a lot easier. You’re so good a making me feel at ease.”

 

She responded with the contagious, beautifying smile.

 

“Should I say something before I ask?” Robert asked himself aloud. “Or just ask? I guess I’ll say something first.” Pausing for an instant, he looked into Penny’s eyes and said, “Penny, I feel sure that I love you very much. I’ve never said that to you before.”

 

“I’m aware of that, Robert,” she replied. “It would have been the right thing to do, even a long time ago. I’ve felt sure about your love even though you lacked the courage to tell me.”

 

“Well, then,” sighed Robert, beginning to gain confidence. “Since you know that I love you, and you know that I’ve loved you for a long time. Also, since you know that I’ll be a college graduate in June so I could support you, Penny Spangler, will you do the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Her big smile was teasing him. She smiled for several seconds before speaking. “Mr. Lewis, since you expressed it so well, and because I believe you are a sincere and godly young man, and because I came back to this area with the hope that we could become serious, I accept. I want to be Mrs. Penny Lewis.”

 

 

 

They decided to wait until noon the next Sunday to tell anyone. They wanted Robert’s family to be among the first to know of the wedding plans. Robert decided that he would have Penny come to his home for lunch the next day.

 

“Mom, Dad, Kerry, we have something to tell you,” said Robert after the table grace was finished. The dishes of food continued to circle the table, always ending at Chauncey’s place as he still refused to place food on his plate before everyone else had been served. The usual table noise accompanied the peaceful Sunday lunch until Penny made an appeal.

 

“Would you all just stop and be quiet for a minute!” she demanded although her beaming face revealed that her demand was made in a spirit of peace. “Now, listen to Robert. It’s kind of important!”

 

“Wow! I’ve never seen our lunch table become so quiet before,” said Robert. “This really is important. Don’t be shocked but...”

 

Seeing that Robert had reverted to his tongue-tied state of the evening before, Penny continued for him, “We’re planning a wedding! He couldn’t say it so I said it for him.” She was beaming, her smile seeming to reach from ear to ear. She raised her hands above her shoulders and squealed, “We’re getting married!”

 

The kitchen remained very quiet for a few more seconds. Then, Lila clapped her hands and rose to her feet. Then, she walked toward Penny, who was still standing after having made the announcement, and the two women hugged each other.

 

Chauncey had a big, toothless smile and raised his eyebrows as he looked toward Kerry. Kerry seemed somewhat unsure as to what he should be doing so he simply said, “That’s great, Robert!”

 

“We want you to be in the wedding, little brother,” said Robert. “Our plans are not all complete yet, but we do want you and Ben in the wedding.”

 

“And Julie!” said Penny.

 

The excited atmosphere became quiet. No one had expected that statement.

 

“Really?” asked Robert. “You want Julie in the wedding?”

 

“Yes, I want to call her tomorrow, now that you all have been told. I want her to come and walk down the aisle with me if she’s able.”

 

“That sounds great!” said Robert, putting his arm around Penny’s shoulders. “And your dad, too? He should walk you down the aisle, you know.”

 

“We’ll discuss that later, Robert,” Penny’s smile had faded somewhat. “Probably, though, he won’t be there.”

 

No one wanted to touch that statement. So the topic of discussion changed to the when, where and how questions concerning the wedding.

 

“We’ve discussed it, and we decided to ask Brother Fleetwood to perform the ceremony. He’s the new pastor at Lester Chapel.”

 

“Then, you’re having the ceremony at Lester Chapel, Penny?” asked Lila.

 

“No, now here’s another surprise,” squealed Penny. “Lester Chapel is not an attractive church, and it’s harder for people from out of town to find it. We decided to have the wedding in the St. Leon Friends Church. It’s a new building, easy to find.”

 

“Really?” Lila asked incredulously. “That will be nice. I think that will be the first wedding in that new church house.”

 

“Yes, we already checked, and there have been no wedding in there yet. Ours will be the first,” Penny said. Looking toward Lila, she added, “Lila, I was wondering about where to have the reception. It’s kind of bold of me to ask, but I hoped we could have the reception here.”

 

“Here? You mean in my house?”

 

“Is that asking too much?”

 

“Not at all! I’m honored,” said Lila. “It will be like a family reunion and wedding all in one.”

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GreenRay

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* En celle fra et menneske inneholder 75MB med genetisk informasjon

 

* En spermcelle inneholder halvparten av det, altså 37,5MB

 

* En milliliter med sperm inneholder rundt 100 millioner spermceller

 

* I gjennomsnitt har hver ejukalasjon rundt 2,25 milliliter sperm og varer rundt 5 sekunder

 

* Dette betyr at informasjonen som strømmer ut av mannens lem er lik (37,5MB x 100 000 0

Dette betyr at kvinnens eggcelle kan motstå et DDoS-angrep på 1,5TB i sekundet, og slipper kun gjennom en eneste datapakke.

 

Dette må sies å være den beste brannmuren i verden.

 

Forøvrig skal det nevnes at den ene pakken som slipper gjennom

henger systemet i hele 9 måneder...

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En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles. En god stil må først og fremst være klar. Den må være passende. Aristoteles.

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