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AllFather

AllFather

Skrevet
Skrevet

Jeg har nå fire Liverpool spillere på laget, så jeg gjør ikke bytter, dvs kan ikke uten å fjerne en fra Liverpool :p

Siden det gikk på ræv forrige sesong når jeg var relativt taktisk men gikk på noen blundre og falt ut av topp 10 til 20, så satser jeg denne gang med hjertet, så har jeg iallfall en unnskyldning inne :p

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Benbjo

Benbjo

Skrevet
Skrevet

 

 

For en idiot. På tide at tidligere spillere ikke automatisk er kvalifisert til å bli "fotballeksperter".

 

 

Leste du artikkelen? Scholes sier da ikke noe spesielt galt, og det at han liksom skal ha sagt at Sanchez er et feilkjøp er noe journalisten finner på. Scholes sier at Arsenal trenger en topspiss og en midtbanespiller for å være seriøse tittelkandidater. Det tror jeg veldig mange Arsenalfans generelt er enige i. Så stiller hans også spørsmål om Sanchez var et riktig kjøp eller ikke gitt behovene vi har.

 

Kanskje, kanskje ikke. For tidlig å si. Sanchez kan fort bli toppspissen han, men det fordrer jo at han får tillit der og vi har dekket behovene på kant.

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AllFather

AllFather

Skrevet
Skrevet (endret)

Denne må man nesten like , Liverpool supporter eller ei:

 

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/liverpool-fc-201415-what-probably-7567035

:D

 

 

 

Liverpool FC in 2014/15: What (probably) won't happen this season

 

 

August

 

Liverpool begin the season on a bright and breezy day at home to Southampton and start the game like a house on fire, hitting the post 36 times in the first 15 minutes before start to tail off towards the end of the first half.

 

Then, a jinking run from Coutinho in which the little Brazilian performs 54 stepovers, a Cruyff turn, a Maradona turn and a three point turn before being felled by Vincent Wanyama, the only player who has been at Southampton for more than a month, wins the Reds a penalty.

 

 

Philippe Coutinho of Liverpool celebrates after tying the whole Southampton squad in a knot.

Rickie Lambert steps up against his former club and scores past a gloveless Fraser Forster, who was forced to sell his Sondicos for £500,000 to Newcastle.

 

The second half is a drab affair until Dejan Lovren repeats his Anfield heroics - for Southampton. His own-goal means the game ends 1-1.

 

Elsewhere in the Premier League, Manchester United start the season with a 4-1 win over Swansea - sending shivers of dread down the spines of each and every manager in the Premier League. Chelsea win 1-0 at Burnley, with Jose Mourinho playing 5-5-0 formation and a last-minute goal from a £24m reserve that has spent six years on loan at Vitesse Arnhem.

 

Liverpool lose their second game of the season after going in front and dominating in the first half. Unfortunately, City pull one back before the linesman grabs a dramatic last-minute winner. The Reds bounce back with a comfortable win over Tottenham.

 

Jim White appears at every stadium in the Premier League on a frantic last day. Liverpool, still in need of a striker, announce the signing of a 12-year-old Macedonia striking starlet with just seconds remaining on the clock.

 

The transfer window comes to a close with Harry Redknapp frantically trying to secure Tony Adams on a one-year £200,000 a week contract. "He's a triffic player," says Harry. Jamie Redknapp agrees.

 

September

 

Liverpool continue their impressive start to the season with a routine win over Aston Villa, before heading to West Ham to play Sam Allardyce's side.

 

"Big Sam", under pressure from the fans, implores his team to play ugly for a change and feels there was nothing wrong when Simon Mignolet is mugged by Matt Jarvis in a balaclava in the build-up to West Ham's goal.

 

 

West Ham manager Sam Allardyce

The Merseyside derby, meanwhile, ends 5-5 as both teams continue with their philosophy of trying to outscore each other.

 

Arsenal continue to win every game and Skybet stop taking bets on them to win the title. At the forefront of their title charge is Sanchez, with a season total of 0 goals, 0 assists and 386 step-overs continues to be Paul Merson and Charlie Nicholas' player of the season.

 

October

 

The Reds comfortably beat both West Brom and QPR with Daniel Sturridge scoring in both games. Unfortunately the Reds suffer their routine "Anfield off-day" against Steve Bruce's Hull City, who escape with a 1-0 win. Alex Ferguson sends Bruce a congratulatory text, which Bruce has blown up to the size of his head and put above his mantlepiece.

 

 

A portrait of Steve Bruce.

Meanwhile, Ferguson's old club Man Utd keep in touch with the top four with a 1-0 win over West Brom. Louis van Gaal modestly claims afterwards that he invented the 4-4-2 formation.

 

Chelsea continue to entertain with a 0-0 draw against Crystal Palace and Newcastle back Alan Pardew despite a run of seven games without a win and his karate chop on an opposition kitman.

 

November

 

Liverpool get back on track with a 2-0 win at St. James' Park, before facing Chelsea at Anfield. Jose Mourinho's latest tactical masterclass is to play a 10-0-0, escaping with a 1-0 defeat.

 

Sky replay Liverpool's 3-3 draw with Crystal Palace 78 times on each of their five channels in the space of four days in the build up to Liverpool's game at Selhurst Park. Dwight Gayle says he is ready to have a similar impact against the Reds.

 

He watches from the bench as Liverpool win 3-0.

 

But the Reds can only manage a 0-0 draw with Stoke City, who spend the majority of the game lumping balls up to Bojan.

 

Arsenal meanwhile, continue to win every game they play. The Premier League get so carried away that the scratch the "A" onto the trophy prematurely.

 

December

 

All the Premier League managers band together to hold a mass press conference in which they are to voice their disapproval of the notoriously "hectic winter fixture list ," only for no one to turn up as they are far too busy taking part in the "hectic winter fixture list" to commit to complaining about the "hectic winter fixture list."

 

They then proceed to grumble about the "hectic winter fixture list" in every post-match press conference until the end of time.

 

Liverpool's Boxing Day match against Burnley is called off when ex-Clarets goalkeeper Brian Jensen is found on the Turf Moor centre circle in an Eggnog and sausage roll-induced coma and can't be moved by conventional machinery.

 

He's left there as a warning to the local children on the dangers of festive overindulgence and the match is re-scheduled for a later date.

 

Oh, and Liverpool win every game this month, progressing into the Champions League second round and beating Arsenal 5-4 after being 4-0 down in 20 minutes.

 

Merry Christmas.

 

January

 

The Reds make it 10 consecutive wins in the league after outfoxing the Foxes and hammering the Hammers.

 

In between the Reds meet Aston Villa and Sunderland and Martin Skrtel is chokeslammed, powerbombed and bodyslammed by cultured duo Connor Wickham and Christian Beneteke. The Reds concede six goals in the two games, but score 10.

 

Villa's French left-back Aly Cissokho impresses everyone with his positional sense during the game until he is found wandering down Walton Breck Road 10 minutes into the second half.

 

 

Aly Cissokho was later found dazed and confused wandering down Queens Drive.

Sky Sports attempt to clone Jim White so he can be at every ground at once on transfer deadline day, spending millions of pounds in the process. They finally succeed, only for him to sign a multi-million pound deal with BT Sport soon after. They also snap up the yellow ticker and exclusive rights to deadline day for the next 31 years.

 

It's money well spent as Harry Redknapp signs Jermaine Jenas and Nicky Barmby on four-year contracts. Robbie Keane meanwhile, gets his dream move to boyhood club Guadalajara in the Mexican Superliga.

 

February

 

The month begins with the Merseyside derby, which ends 6-6 as both teams continue with their philosophy of trying to outscore each other.

 

Reds fans treat their other halves to an exciting Valentine's Day trip to Reading in the FA Cup fifth round. Most end up single soon afterwards, but the Reds march on in the cup, winning 3-0.

 

Wins over Spurs and Southampton follow. But Man City escape from Anfield with a 2-2 draw.

 

But Liverpool are eliminated from the Champions League by Legia Warsaw, a surprise entrant in the last 16 following months of pleading with Uefa for one last match. Liverpool, who didn't even realise the game was being played, lose 1-0.

 

Elsewhere Arsenal continue a losing streak that has seen them lose every single game since the start of the year, but Arsene Wenger dismisses a 5-0 defeat to hated rivals Spurs as "a slip up" and insists that the Gunners goal of Champions League football remains intact.

 

 

A normal day at the office for Arsene Wenger.

Louis van Gaal insists his decision to commission a statue of himself outside the Arndale Centre isn't egotistical, insisting it's just reward for someone who helped invent goalposts.

 

March

 

Liverpool defeat Burnley and but Clarets boss Sean Dyche endears himself to Merseysiders by charitably volunteering to help out by covering a shift on the doors in Mathew Street the following night.

 

The Reds look on the verge of defeat in their next game in South Wales at Swansea after a first half 45-yard overhead bicycle kick from Jonjo Shelvey, who refuses to celebrate. He does, however, celebrate in the 95th minute when his back-heel flick pass-back is intercepted by Lambert to salvage a draw for the Reds.

 

 

Jonjo Shelvey holds his hands up, for everything.

Liverpool then travel to the Louis van Gaal Stadium to face Manchester United. Steven Gerrard is pictured on the front of the OK Magazine in the build-up to game talking about his love affair with the Sky Sports Camera, and shows his love to the world by snogging it one more time after scoring the winner with his fifth penalty of the game.

 

The Milk/Coca-Cola/Worthington/Carling/Capital One Cup final is won by Newcastle. Alan Pardew is the promptly sacked for failing to meet the club's targets of zero trophies and constant misery.

 

April

 

The Premier League enters its final straight with Liverpool, Chelsea, Manchester City and Manchester United all neck, neck, neck and (van Gaal's) very long neck.

 

Liverpool's trip to the Emirates is crucial. Premier League title favourites Arsenal, who are now 27 points off the top having lost every single game since the turn of the year, are now battling for the Fourth Place Trophy.

 

The Gunners take the lead with a well taken goal from Sanchez, his first of the season. He spends the rest of the game having a well-earned nap with Mesut Ozil on the touchline. Liverpool win 2-1.

 

Jack Wilshere wins man of the match for his five minute cameo at the end of the game, and commentators hail him as the future of England's midfield.

 

Man City and Man United play out a 4-4 draw before Chelsea hold United to a 0-0 draw. Mourinho declares his side out of the title race but praises his side for the least entertaining performance of the season.

 

May

 

Churches, synagogues, mosques, temples and Robbie Fowler all witness a surge in popularity in Liverpool as fans across the city offer their prayers to higher powers as the title race nears its conclusion.

 

Arry's QPR side are dispatched at Anfield to start the month and a showdown with a Portuguese fella has stomachs in knots throughout the city.

 

Chelsea's young emerging side defend heroically in Mourinho's patented 10-0-0 formation. The "Special One" admits he is forced to adopt such tactics having only been afforded £78m to strengthen his squad in the January transfer window.

 

 

Jose Mourinho attempts to buy the match-ball, offering £59m for its services.

With moments left and a 0-0 draw sending Manchester City top Gerrard rolls the years back to 2006 with a 30-yard humdinger into the top corner. Liverpool are top of the league.

 

The Reds then face Crystal Palace at Anfield and Rodgers' side win 3-0. No drama.

 

Rodgers' men defeat Stoke City on the final day of the season to finish top of the league but the trophy is sent to the Emirates after the Premier League got carried away and, along with pundits up and down the country, declared Arsenal champions in November.

 

Tony Pulis wins the Premier League manager of the year after his reappointment at Stoke City. He guides the Potters from 15th to 13th within the space of three months.

 

The Champions League is won by Barcelona, spearheaded by Lionel Messi, Neymar and Luis Suarez, who score 146 goals between them in the competition alone.

 

Endret av AllFather
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SUSE and Pepsi

SUSE and Pepsi

Skrevet
Skrevet

Denne må man nesten like , Liverpool supporter eller ei:

 

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/liverpool-fc-201415-what-probably-7567035

:D

 

 

 

Liverpool FC in 2014/15: What (probably) won't happen this season

 

 

August

 

Liverpool begin the season on a bright and breezy day at home to Southampton and start the game like a house on fire, hitting the post 36 times in the first 15 minutes before start to tail off towards the end of the first half.

 

Then, a jinking run from Coutinho in which the little Brazilian performs 54 stepovers, a Cruyff turn, a Maradona turn and a three point turn before being felled by Vincent Wanyama, the only player who has been at Southampton for more than a month, wins the Reds a penalty.

 

 

Philippe Coutinho of Liverpool celebrates after tying the whole Southampton squad in a knot.

Rickie Lambert steps up against his former club and scores past a gloveless Fraser Forster, who was forced to sell his Sondicos for £500,000 to Newcastle.

 

The second half is a drab affair until Dejan Lovren repeats his Anfield heroics - for Southampton. His own-goal means the game ends 1-1.

 

Elsewhere in the Premier League, Manchester United start the season with a 4-1 win over Swansea - sending shivers of dread down the spines of each and every manager in the Premier League. Chelsea win 1-0 at Burnley, with Jose Mourinho playing 5-5-0 formation and a last-minute goal from a £24m reserve that has spent six years on loan at Vitesse Arnhem.

 

Liverpool lose their second game of the season after going in front and dominating in the first half. Unfortunately, City pull one back before the linesman grabs a dramatic last-minute winner. The Reds bounce back with a comfortable win over Tottenham.

 

Jim White appears at every stadium in the Premier League on a frantic last day. Liverpool, still in need of a striker, announce the signing of a 12-year-old Macedonia striking starlet with just seconds remaining on the clock.

 

The transfer window comes to a close with Harry Redknapp frantically trying to secure Tony Adams on a one-year £200,000 a week contract. "He's a triffic player," says Harry. Jamie Redknapp agrees.

 

September

 

Liverpool continue their impressive start to the season with a routine win over Aston Villa, before heading to West Ham to play Sam Allardyce's side.

 

"Big Sam", under pressure from the fans, implores his team to play ugly for a change and feels there was nothing wrong when Simon Mignolet is mugged by Matt Jarvis in a balaclava in the build-up to West Ham's goal.

 

 

West Ham manager Sam Allardyce

The Merseyside derby, meanwhile, ends 5-5 as both teams continue with their philosophy of trying to outscore each other.

 

Arsenal continue to win every game and Skybet stop taking bets on them to win the title. At the forefront of their title charge is Sanchez, with a season total of 0 goals, 0 assists and 386 step-overs continues to be Paul Merson and Charlie Nicholas' player of the season.

 

October

 

The Reds comfortably beat both West Brom and QPR with Daniel Sturridge scoring in both games. Unfortunately the Reds suffer their routine "Anfield off-day" against Steve Bruce's Hull City, who escape with a 1-0 win. Alex Ferguson sends Bruce a congratulatory text, which Bruce has blown up to the size of his head and put above his mantlepiece.

 

 

A portrait of Steve Bruce.

Meanwhile, Ferguson's old club Man Utd keep in touch with the top four with a 1-0 win over West Brom. Louis van Gaal modestly claims afterwards that he invented the 4-4-2 formation.

 

Chelsea continue to entertain with a 0-0 draw against Crystal Palace and Newcastle back Alan Pardew despite a run of seven games without a win and his karate chop on an opposition kitman.

 

November

 

Liverpool get back on track with a 2-0 win at St. James' Park, before facing Chelsea at Anfield. Jose Mourinho's latest tactical masterclass is to play a 10-0-0, escaping with a 1-0 defeat.

 

Sky replay Liverpool's 3-3 draw with Crystal Palace 78 times on each of their five channels in the space of four days in the build up to Liverpool's game at Selhurst Park. Dwight Gayle says he is ready to have a similar impact against the Reds.

 

He watches from the bench as Liverpool win 3-0.

 

But the Reds can only manage a 0-0 draw with Stoke City, who spend the majority of the game lumping balls up to Bojan.

 

Arsenal meanwhile, continue to win every game they play. The Premier League get so carried away that the scratch the "A" onto the trophy prematurely.

 

December

 

All the Premier League managers band together to hold a mass press conference in which they are to voice their disapproval of the notoriously "hectic winter fixture list ," only for no one to turn up as they are far too busy taking part in the "hectic winter fixture list" to commit to complaining about the "hectic winter fixture list."

 

They then proceed to grumble about the "hectic winter fixture list" in every post-match press conference until the end of time.

 

Liverpool's Boxing Day match against Burnley is called off when ex-Clarets goalkeeper Brian Jensen is found on the Turf Moor centre circle in an Eggnog and sausage roll-induced coma and can't be moved by conventional machinery.

 

He's left there as a warning to the local children on the dangers of festive overindulgence and the match is re-scheduled for a later date.

 

Oh, and Liverpool win every game this month, progressing into the Champions League second round and beating Arsenal 5-4 after being 4-0 down in 20 minutes.

 

Merry Christmas.

 

January

 

The Reds make it 10 consecutive wins in the league after outfoxing the Foxes and hammering the Hammers.

 

In between the Reds meet Aston Villa and Sunderland and Martin Skrtel is chokeslammed, powerbombed and bodyslammed by cultured duo Connor Wickham and Christian Beneteke. The Reds concede six goals in the two games, but score 10.

 

Villa's French left-back Aly Cissokho impresses everyone with his positional sense during the game until he is found wandering down Walton Breck Road 10 minutes into the second half.

 

 

Aly Cissokho was later found dazed and confused wandering down Queens Drive.

Sky Sports attempt to clone Jim White so he can be at every ground at once on transfer deadline day, spending millions of pounds in the process. They finally succeed, only for him to sign a multi-million pound deal with BT Sport soon after. They also snap up the yellow ticker and exclusive rights to deadline day for the next 31 years.

 

It's money well spent as Harry Redknapp signs Jermaine Jenas and Nicky Barmby on four-year contracts. Robbie Keane meanwhile, gets his dream move to boyhood club Guadalajara in the Mexican Superliga.

 

February

 

The month begins with the Merseyside derby, which ends 6-6 as both teams continue with their philosophy of trying to outscore each other.

 

Reds fans treat their other halves to an exciting Valentine's Day trip to Reading in the FA Cup fifth round. Most end up single soon afterwards, but the Reds march on in the cup, winning 3-0.

 

Wins over Spurs and Southampton follow. But Man City escape from Anfield with a 2-2 draw.

 

But Liverpool are eliminated from the Champions League by Legia Warsaw, a surprise entrant in the last 16 following months of pleading with Uefa for one last match. Liverpool, who didn't even realise the game was being played, lose 1-0.

 

Elsewhere Arsenal continue a losing streak that has seen them lose every single game since the start of the year, but Arsene Wenger dismisses a 5-0 defeat to hated rivals Spurs as "a slip up" and insists that the Gunners goal of Champions League football remains intact.

 

 

A normal day at the office for Arsene Wenger.

Louis van Gaal insists his decision to commission a statue of himself outside the Arndale Centre isn't egotistical, insisting it's just reward for someone who helped invent goalposts.

 

March

 

Liverpool defeat Burnley and but Clarets boss Sean Dyche endears himself to Merseysiders by charitably volunteering to help out by covering a shift on the doors in Mathew Street the following night.

 

The Reds look on the verge of defeat in their next game in South Wales at Swansea after a first half 45-yard overhead bicycle kick from Jonjo Shelvey, who refuses to celebrate. He does, however, celebrate in the 95th minute when his back-heel flick pass-back is intercepted by Lambert to salvage a draw for the Reds.

 

 

Jonjo Shelvey holds his hands up, for everything.

Liverpool then travel to the Louis van Gaal Stadium to face Manchester United. Steven Gerrard is pictured on the front of the OK Magazine in the build-up to game talking about his love affair with the Sky Sports Camera, and shows his love to the world by snogging it one more time after scoring the winner with his fifth penalty of the game.

 

The Milk/Coca-Cola/Worthington/Carling/Capital One Cup final is won by Newcastle. Alan Pardew is the promptly sacked for failing to meet the club's targets of zero trophies and constant misery.

 

April

 

The Premier League enters its final straight with Liverpool, Chelsea, Manchester City and Manchester United all neck, neck, neck and (van Gaal's) very long neck.

 

Liverpool's trip to the Emirates is crucial. Premier League title favourites Arsenal, who are now 27 points off the top having lost every single game since the turn of the year, are now battling for the Fourth Place Trophy.

 

The Gunners take the lead with a well taken goal from Sanchez, his first of the season. He spends the rest of the game having a well-earned nap with Mesut Ozil on the touchline. Liverpool win 2-1.

 

Jack Wilshere wins man of the match for his five minute cameo at the end of the game, and commentators hail him as the future of England's midfield.

 

Man City and Man United play out a 4-4 draw before Chelsea hold United to a 0-0 draw. Mourinho declares his side out of the title race but praises his side for the least entertaining performance of the season.

 

May

 

Churches, synagogues, mosques, temples and Robbie Fowler all witness a surge in popularity in Liverpool as fans across the city offer their prayers to higher powers as the title race nears its conclusion.

 

Arry's QPR side are dispatched at Anfield to start the month and a showdown with a Portuguese fella has stomachs in knots throughout the city.

 

Chelsea's young emerging side defend heroically in Mourinho's patented 10-0-0 formation. The "Special One" admits he is forced to adopt such tactics having only been afforded £78m to strengthen his squad in the January transfer window.

 

 

Jose Mourinho attempts to buy the match-ball, offering £59m for its services.

With moments left and a 0-0 draw sending Manchester City top Gerrard rolls the years back to 2006 with a 30-yard humdinger into the top corner. Liverpool are top of the league.

 

The Reds then face Crystal Palace at Anfield and Rodgers' side win 3-0. No drama.

 

Rodgers' men defeat Stoke City on the final day of the season to finish top of the league but the trophy is sent to the Emirates after the Premier League got carried away and, along with pundits up and down the country, declared Arsenal champions in November.

 

Tony Pulis wins the Premier League manager of the year after his reappointment at Stoke City. He guides the Potters from 15th to 13th within the space of three months.

 

The Champions League is won by Barcelona, spearheaded by Lionel Messi, Neymar and Luis Suarez, who score 146 goals between them in the competition alone.

 

 

Skal innrømme at det fikk meg til å flire.

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Dapper Chap

Dapper Chap

Skrevet
Skrevet

Leste rask gjennom artikkelen, og der var det ikke mye å bli klok av. Samme oppbrukte skvipet som alle "ekspertene" kommer med. Det er aldri noen som tilføyer noe nytt eller noe som ikke er kjempeenkelt å tenke seg til. Aldri noe som er interessant å lese. Helt på trynet at alle tidligere fotballspillere er automatisk kvalifisert til å få jobb som fotballekspert, som må være den letteste jobben i verden fordi den krever null kunnskap, eneste kriteriet er at du må klare å fortelle det åpenbare, og blande inn litt av sin egen partisket, som for eksempel Owen er kjempeflink til.

 

Jeg synes man enten burde droppe fotballeksperter helt, fordi man lærer aldri noe nytt, eller faktisk ansette noen med litt kunnskap. Fotballsupportere har ofte mye mer kunnskap enn spillere. Eller (tidligere) managere. Tony Pulis var ekspert for BBC her om dagen og det var noe av det beste jeg har hørt på lang, lang tid. Managere har hvertfall peiling, i motsetning til spillere som kun vet hva de skal gjøre for å bli god i sin posisjon, og ikke en dritt om resten av laget eller andre lag.

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SUSE and Pepsi

SUSE and Pepsi

Skrevet
Skrevet

Leste rask gjennom artikkelen, og der var det ikke mye å bli klok av. Samme oppbrukte skvipet som alle "ekspertene" kommer med. Det er aldri noen som tilføyer noe nytt eller noe som ikke er kjempeenkelt å tenke seg til. Aldri noe som er interessant å lese. Helt på trynet at alle tidligere fotballspillere er automatisk kvalifisert til å få jobb som fotballekspert, som må være den letteste jobben i verden fordi den krever null kunnskap, eneste kriteriet er at du må klare å fortelle det åpenbare, og blande inn litt av sin egen partisket, som for eksempel Owen er kjempeflink til.

 

Jeg synes man enten burde droppe fotballeksperter helt, fordi man lærer aldri noe nytt, eller faktisk ansette noen med litt kunnskap. Fotballsupportere har ofte mye mer kunnskap enn spillere. Eller (tidligere) managere. Tony Pulis var ekspert for BBC her om dagen og det var noe av det beste jeg har hørt på lang, lang tid. Managere har hvertfall peiling, i motsetning til spillere som kun vet hva de skal gjøre for å bli god i sin posisjon, og ikke en dritt om resten av laget eller andre lag.

 

Tenk Assou-Ekotto som pundit i Sky :/ Synes jeg hører det allerede

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